[.:ronnie89:.]

i am tired of fighting for my life... i have asthma and its getting worse... i have been intubated two times in the past three weeks... i am tired of the doctors giving me false hope... they tell me that all i have to do to stay out of the hospital is take my medicine and avoid my triggers... i do that.. i have been doing that... so why isnt it working??? if that is all i had to do then i would not have been intubated and put on a ventilator two times in three weeks... i am tired of having to be rushed to the er literally fighting for my life... i am 21 years old... i should not have to live this way... i am scared that one of these times i am either not going to make it to the hospital in time for them to help me or they are going to intubate me and i am not going to be able to come off the ventilator... i cant help thinking about it... i know that if it comes down to that, i am ready, but at the same time i am not ready because there is so much i want to do with my life... what do i do??? i just cant take it anymore... i dont want to live like this anymore... i either want to die or get better... i just cant do it...

[Fresia]

I am so sorry to hear this is happening for you. After having to go the ER a lot myself lately for something else, I can understand your concern, frustration, and need for it to stop.

My asthma has been controlled as of late. But when I moved here, it flared significantly. I went back to the doc to discuss new possible triggers and additional ways to control these. I don't know what your normal triggers are but the doc sent me for allergy testing. They found sensitivity to more kinds of molds, pollens, grasses, and some trees, which had not been there previously. Was able to get onto Singulair, which take year round now to help with this and the flares decreased.

I'm not implying this is the case for you, only that there may be new things triggering that you are not aware of. Consider if there is any pattern or timing that coincides for your flares, when and what you were doing. Sometimes this can give you an idea for new triggers to help with management . I also know that sometimes there is no way to tell, and this is where the frustration comes in too.

I understand the fear and the frustration of not having it controlled. It is scary not knowing if you are going to make it. Talk to your doc about other things you can have at home to help so you might not have to go to the ER, such as I had Oxygen at one point too besides the nebulizer, and inhalers and to look for other causes/triggers too.

I don't know if this might help. There really might be other possibilities to get it under control. Please don't give up hope.

[Perna]

Oh, I hate when my asthma flares. Fortunately it hasn't now for about three years. When I've had to go to the ER twice in the past, I've had to go on prednisone and that got it under control pretty quick.

What does your regular doctor say? Have you been tested for other problems? My asthma seems to have gotten even better than it was since I've had to start taking Vitamin D.

http://www.webmd.com/asthma/news/201...asthma-control

If I were you, I'd have my doctor do all sorts of tests, see if they can figure out why your asthma won't get under control.

[.:ronnie89:.]

we are trying to get alot of testing done... right now i take advair and singulair on a daily basis... i also have two neb treatments.... one is a duoneb and the otehr is straight albuterol... also am on ventolin rescue inhaler... i am jsut so scared... we already know alot of my allergies, but are trying to get more allergy tests done but having trouble finding that allergist that accepts medicaid... i have also been to the pulmonologist... mine are more of the broncial spasms that make my airways close up rather than the wheezing and stuff like that... that is what we are trying to figure out... thE BRONCHIAL SPASMS... for some reason that is what the problem has been.... i get such bad bronchial spasms that my airways clsoe up and i cant breathe... it is rather quite scary...

[(JD)]

I know exactly how you feel. First, may I gently remind you that becoming upset will trigger chemicals that you could be reacting to, within your body?

Breathe...slowly and deeply if you can...

As we age, especially when our hormones change (like maturing, having children, etc.) our allergies and triggers change too.

I can't take any of the rescue breathers as I have anaphylactic reactions to them! I'm also allergic to epi (and am oversensitive to the nor epi my body produces.)

It's very difficult tracing and tracking down what has changed and what is the biggest threat now, but well worth it. I pray for answers for you, and healing. Good wishes.

[.:ronnie89:.]

thank you for that... it gave me a little more hope for finding out what is wrong... i don't feel so bad now... maybe now i can push on and get through this... wiht my boyfriends help of course... i mean there are still fears and questions and concerns, but i guess i just have to trust that the doctors know what they are talking about and give them time to do what they need to do to help me... i have had children and my allergies i know have changed... i used to not be allergic to alot of the things that i am alleric to now... i am still in the trial and error stage of my allergy list... good lord help me!!! i have such a long journey ahead of me... there is so much i want to do with my life... i just hope it doesn't end too soon... but i have to keep in mind that tomorrow is never promised to any of us...