Is dying of cancer

[Rhapsody]

I am sorry

[AWhispersEcho]

I am so sorry to hear that. I lost my Gramma 3 years ago, we miss her very much...

keep posting...



It always helps me.

AWE

Well, here is some more info...

About six months ago or so, she had cancer in her lower abdomen area. The first doctor said that it was aggressive and had to be removed...and well, my grandma...being her ornery self got really huffy with him because that was apparently not what he told her earlier. The guy then told her that she has to find another doctor because he won't operate on people that don't trust him. (that pisses me off. I don't care whether or not you like your patient, you should do your job as a doctor!) the next doctor said that it was very slow growing and was like skin cancer but on the inside and is treated with radiation and chemo. Well, she got the treatment which shrunk the tumor down to nothing and she got another scan that said she was cancer free. Well, it seems the first doctor must have been right because they found out recently that she has cancer in her lungs, liver, and with hot spots in other areas like the adrenal glands, etc. believe it or not just a few years earlier, at the same age, her sister had the exact same cancer and died. Right now though my grandma doesn't feel sick and opted against treatment because it's just too late at this point for it to work and she'd rather enjoy her last year or so. My mama said that we were either going to visit in June, or that she'd come up for my graduation (she lives in Georgia) and that she and my step dad would move in with her to help take care of her after we graduate and stuff.

I'm pretty sad about it. Which actualy, is abnormal for me. Even though everybody else would be sad. I mean, I know she was going to die eventualy, I just thought she was going to stick around longer that's all.

[free2beme]

(((((((((((((((( kaika ))))))))))

[notz]

Kaika,

I'm sorry to hear about your Grandmother. Try to stay focused on the things you need to do for you. As odd as it may sound, this is an opportunity for growth. Try to stay in the moment and experience all that your Grandmother's illness touches. Watch your Mother, see how it affects her. Put yourself in her shoes. Don't be afraid to talk about your feelings or your observations. Let your Mom know she can talk with you too. You're very astute and a very caring person. The time may come during this illness when you become aware of that for yourself in a new and different way.

Remember, we care about you.

I know, I've already talked with my mom. I know she probably feels worse then I do because it's her mother. But I don't think she needs me. She has her faith now. And her husband too of course. There isn't much I can really do for her anyways.

You know, she was talking to her friend on the phone, she was talking about how it seemed to be as though she was narrating in her head...like one of those magazine articles and stuff and how weird it was. I wanted to ask her why that was so weird. I've been like that pretty much my whole life. I mean, not all of the time, and probably not even most of the time...but enough so that if it does happen it doesn't sound off any alarms...it's just ordinary for me to detach and reattach myself to reality.

Another update: My aunt Myra visited her, and apparently she is a lot sicker then she let on, and we'll be lucky if she lives another six months

Another update: Her physical condition is still pretty bad because she is having a hard time getting around and wants to be put on oxygen because she feels like she isn't getting enough air. I filled out a blank card for her yesterday and I asked mom today after listening to her talk on the phone in great detail about her condition (which by the way, I was "erk" earlier) if she would be able to get my card before she dies...you know how postage is. My mama reassured me that she would. I think she is less scared now too, and she is anxious to see us, as we are anxious to see her too. I'm always very aggravated and upset when they talk about religion around me...but I decided over the weekend when step-dad decided he wanted to pray before ever meal (or at least dinner) that I just gave up on thinking that they'd ever lighten up on this stuff despite my quiet protests (more about that in my post in the healthy parenting forum I think) and given the situation I was way more acceptable of it because that is what my mama is trying to use to cope anyways.

[notz]

It's good of you to acknowledge and respect your Mother and step father's need to cope in their chosen way. That's real maturity on your part, sweet one.

Already, you are receiving lessons from this end of life event. Stand tall.

I guess I am just a fast learner?

Well, if forgot to update that she went to the hospital last week because her blood/oxygen level was low because the cancer is in both of her lungs ( the level was eighty-something. The normal is ninety something.) and they gave her medicine for her swelling feet. She's really happy that they look and feel like normal feet now. She's also feeling a jillion times better thanks to the hospital giving her oxygen and she is feeling well enough to get around her house at least. (before she was stuck in bed alot because she couldn't breathe well and she has always had circulatory issues in her legs that made her feet hurt really bad to walk) also ever since she had her heart attack last year she has been on meds to reduce her heart rate, mama thinks if they lessen the dosage she might feel better because maybe one reason why she is having so much difficulty getting around is that her heart is too slow. My mom is pretty smart about these things because she works in a clinic that deals with old people with the same issues every day.

But for the moment, physicaly she is doing a lot better. She's also accepted that she's just going sooner rather then later so she is doing a lot better mentaly and emotionaly too. If she stays this way for awhile maybe she will be well enough to go somewhere like the beach when we visit

[nightbird]

That would be lovely Kaika.... an outing.
Make sure she wears a hat, (a floppy one maybe). She will benefit from the vitamin D in the sunshine.

Does she like fresh, home made juice, Kaika?

If so, maybe she'd like a Jack LaLane juicer (they are like $89.00 at Costco and Walmart) because she can juice all the veggies and fruits she wants too! It's good for cancer patients nutrition.

Then, there is also another easy way to slow this down, and that's to drink warm water with lemon also.

Things like 'juicing' and drinking lemon-water turn the ph in our bodies towards the alkaline state, and it's hard for cancer cells to grow in conditions like that.

Also, there are terrific green drink recipes all over the web and at websites about the best cancer nutrition ... so she can have quite the variety.

She can still do her hot meals... and oatmeal is wonderful in the a.m., as is drinking green tea, if she likes that.

If not, well, there are other sources of nutrients she can get into her system that will make life a little easier.

There is a wonderful cookbook, called 'One Bite At A Time' for Cancer Patients and their Families... the pictures are beautiful of the plated recipes and they are simple to make, and the best cancer fighting foods are on each plate. It's really remarkable how well nourished we can be these days.

I wish you all the best and I'm so sorry this is happening in your family, to your Grandmother.

So, juicing is real easy, and she may take to that like a fish to water... and she can be real creative with it too. Ask her if she'd like to try it, if you think you want to go there with her ~

I hope the best for your family, and that your Grandmother has quality time with her loved ones, and that she makes a little time, if she can, to join a cancer support group, as all ages benefit from the support and sharing of info, ideas, and recipes too!

I think you are handling this in a mature fashion, and I know that it will be appreciated, everything you do and say, during this difficult time.

A sense of humor helps too, as we all love to laugh... and doesn't that make us feel better. Comedies are great to watch when one has cancer as it helps balance things a bit.

So, any funny things she likes, and an outing to the beach sound so divine!

You are a treasure!

Peace and Compassion,
Night
xoxox

(sorry I bounced around on this post, I wanted to say so much, yet I shouldn't say too much as people want to handle things in their own fashion, and I get that. I am just making some suggestions that maybe you can use, is all, I don't mean to be pushy, or anything, so if it looks that way, I'm just a little anxious is all...Luv ya!)