[ocd5mom]

I applied for my daughter to attend an Online Public School this week. I haven't heard back from the admissions office yet, but hopefully we will hear something very soon. I decided to enroll her in this type of school setting, rather than continue to homeschool her, but I was told, rather explosively, that I am not pushing her hard enough to work through her fears and her OCD and anxiety. She is terrified of being in front of people, or in large groups, and I decided that with her medical issues, both physical and mental, that this would be better for her. She has an advanced intellect as well, which makes it difficult for her to perform at the same level as other children her age and I don't want to watch her suffer because she is not being challenged. I am a single parent and I want to do what is right for my child, but I worry that I am coddling her; and I also worry, maybe even more so, that I am pushing her too hard, too fast, and that it will push her to breaking. I don't want to force a "group" setting on her before she is ready, and I don't want her to have difficulty because of her Oxygen Tank (which she has to take everywhere with her, along with two different inhalers because of her lung function-or lack of I should say).

Does anyone have any advice, or an opinion? I will always do what I think is best regardless, but I am also open minded and I want to hear what others think. Sometimes there is a better way to see/do something and I don't want to close myself off from that.....

[Perna]

Who is telling you what you are doing is wrong? You are her mother, have been home schooling her and working with her one-on-one; don't let some "outside" person tell you what you are doing (the best you can!) is "wrong" when they have not been in your position and/or do not know your daughter and her issues as you do!

[googley]

Is she getting therapy? If not, I think that would be a good way to get help for her issues. You would be able to work with her therapist on helping her deal with groups and her OCD. If she is in therapy, this is something you should take up with her therapist. Her therapist would know what is realistic for your daughter to be doing and how to help her best.

[ocd5mom]

Thanks for the support and encouragement...I just wanted to get some outside advice, its mostly my family that's the issue....they think I coddle her. And as for therapy, we are in the process of changing therapists....nothing this one is doing seems to be making any different...so, maybe the new one will, but we don't know who that will be yet.

I am hoping that this new school idea will be good for her, she is a little excited about it. But, I've never known anyone that has/had a child in this type of program, so I'm a little nervous about it, but excited too. Do I sound frantic or crazed yet?

[BlueInanna]

I think you're doing the right thing, sounds to me. In my area, a lot of people home school their children.

[ocd5mom]

Thank you...I wish I could afford to straight homeschool her but this is basically the same thing, except its covered by the state like a public school...so, I guess we will just have to see how it goes...I don't want it to turn out badly for her and make her distrust my decisions. She already questions things too much as it is.

Another option is a small charter school (that's what they are called in Texas). They are free and accredited generally, but much smaller and more individualized than a public school. My hairdresser and his wife homeschooled their sons, but once they reached middle school, they felt the need to let them work more in a school setting, but didn't want to public school them. They found a well-run charter school (you do have to be careful; all charter schools aren't created equal) that they have used ever since. Their youngest son was accepted into a technical high school charter school that focuses on the use of technology and specifically in media and film-making. He's really enjoying it. Perhaps a smaller group environment like that would be the best of both worlds.

[zbmom]

There is nothing wrong with respecting your child and ensuring she gets her education. Having some therapy for her might be helpful so she can work on tolerating things and become a successful adult but throwing her into a school setting when she isn't ready would probably do more harm than good. Trust your instincts, YOU are the expert on your child.

[ocd5mom]

Originally Posted by zbmom

There is nothing wrong with respecting your child and ensuring she gets her education. Having some therapy for her might be helpful so she can work on tolerating things and become a successful adult but throwing her into a school setting when she isn't ready would probably do more harm than good. Trust your instincts, YOU are the expert on your child.

Thank you for that. She is in therapy, but the doctor isn't helping as much as I would like and she doesn't return calls or help reschedule appointments liike she aught either. i'm in the process of looking for a new doctor, but right now its not going as easily as I had hoped. Her progress has slowed and is actually starting to reverse, so we have to do something soon.