Any ideas on what may be going on with my son?

My son is 11 years old and is displaying really weird psychological disorders. I was wondering if anybody on here may be able to understand what could possibly be wrong with him to make him act like he does. One thing, he has no friends that I know of although he says he does, none ever call him or come visit. There are kids his age in the neighborhood and he refuses to go out and play with them. I think he has been bullied at school and I am pretty sure he's annoying to the other kids his age because he is always acting weird.

He has had a roller coaster life because father has always talked really bad about me to him since he was a baby trying to get him to hate me and we had a nasty custody battle when he was still a baby. Starting in Kindergarten he has done off the wall stuff. He interrupts people all the time. He's bouncing off the walls, he's defiant, and the only thing that he ever cries about is if he loses on a video game. He started peeing his pants when he turned 11 last June. He said he likes the way it feels and smells after telling 4 or 5 different lies but he's been to the urologist had x-rays, ultrasounds & nothing is physically wrong with him.

Finally, his dad left the state back in November but I wish it had been when he was a lot younger because every summer he has spent with him, when I would get him back for the school year he would have another weird habit and I was constantly getting complaints from the school saying how he was making meow noises and taking his shoes off walking around the classroom and rocking in his chair constantly, etc. etc. etc.

He had tests done at the psychiatrist. These were the results. The house-tree-person, the Rorschach, the Thematic Apperception Test, The integrated visual and auditory continuous performance test and the Connors parents rating scale. The house tree person suggests a rich fantasy life, focus on the past, mood lability, dependency needs, lack of identity, feelings of inferiority intelligence, , feelings of helplessnessness, feelings of hopelessness.

The Rorschach suggests feelings of inferiority, intelligence, social anxiety, hostility, depression, and sexual concerns.

The TAT reveals feelings of inferiority, anxiety and depression.

According to the patients performance on the IVA + CPT, test results do not support a working diagnosis of ADHD. According to the forms I had to fill out he does have ADHD & the psychiatrist agreed. His IQ score ended up being 122 total and Said he has a superior range of intellectual functioning. The last line said "the patient appeared ous as he was fidgety throughout the testing session.

I was curious what all this could be that he has and what would help him besides being a guinea pig for different meds which none seem to work. Would this qualify him for disability? His father never has paid any support & I do not make a lot of money. I was trying to find out if this is not only ADHD, ODD, and conduct disorder which he's already been diagnosed with but could he have borderline personality disorder too? The psychiatrist said they can't get him in a hospital to be tested and I thought about bootcamp but he has to get in trouble with the law first. What I'm reading is making me feel like the onset of a serial killer & this scares the heck out of me and I don't know what else to do. He's put kittens in the refrigerator, tied a jump rope around a kids neck at day care, and the same day ripped the head and limbs off a little girl's barbie doll. He does all kinds of crazy things but instead of growing out of it, it is getting worse the older he gets.

Any advice on my parenting or anything would be appreciated. All the psychiatrist said the last time was asking me have we tried this med or that med and he's been on Vyvanse, Concerta, Strattera, Risperdal, he wants to try Intuniv but I have just not gave him any meds now that he is out of school for the summer.

I think you have to be working age to be eligible for Disability. I know that Disability income that the recipient is awarded is based on age and education. (Which I do not full understand. I mean persons of the same age and one with a degree and one w/o a degree will get different SSDI benefits I believe.)

Did the psychiatrist ever say that he did not have Aspergers?

Does your son have a therapist?

What meds has he tried for the adhd? How is his sleep?

Why is his father not paying child support? Was it not part of the divorce agreement that he was to send child support? If yes then hire an attorney and sue for back child support. They will garnish his wages and even his tax returns if he owes back child support.

Well, they do have children's disability--it's that the parents or guardians are usually the payees.

A bit confused here .

Did the doctor tell you to not give him meds once school was out?
Or did you stop them on your own?
Is he seeing a therapist?

i am not a medic or psych of any kind, just giving my view based on years of running a pre school, nannying many pre teen kids and my psychology studdied over 20 years ago.

many high functioning/intellectual kids are mis diagnosed as ADHD. this is because they are bored in class so mess about, shout out answers to the annoyance of the teacher or find other annoying ways to try and let the teacher know they are not interested or are done waiting for the others to catch up to their thinking speed. Although highly itellectual these kids often lack the understanding of how or why they feel how they do so often can't tell the teacher they are bored.

being told mum is bad yet seing mum is good will really have an impact on his thinking/view of himself. he could be doubting himself and his views/thoughts. usually the adult caregiver is the best thing since sliced bread and knows everything in young kids eyes, to have someone consistently saying otherwise will make the child doubt their ability to judge others hence his lack of social intergration
often kids do things for a reason that is not visible or clear to an adult, tying something around a kids neck could have been your son pretending to be a cowboy or something and using the other kid as the horse or it could have been the kid was doing something your son disapproved of so he was trying to move him away or any one of a long list of things, the only way to know why is to talk to your son and ask if he remembers why he did it, same goes for the barbie and the kitten and any other 'weird' stuff he does/did.
until you understand why he does things you will not be able to help him.
if possible try restricting video games to use as rewards for spending time talking to you about what he has done and how it made him feel. start off with five or ten minutes when tv is off and there are no distractions, let him know you love him to bits, that he can tell you anything and you will not get cross or punish him for what he tells you, and that you may even be able to help him find a way to fix any problems or things he doesn't quite understand. next night spend five or ten minutes again no distractions, sit him on your knee if permitted, talk about good times from his younger days, ask if he remembers ....if yes then ask how he feels about it, was it fun, were you sad etc. acknowledge and confirm his feelings are/were ok and valid, from then on try every night to build up time talking with him ask more leading questions till you understand what is going on in his mind, over time you will catch up to present day things then you can let him take the lead by simply asking what did you do today? and how did it make you feel. by doing the reaffirming work before this stage he should be ready to more open with you than a lot of pre teens whose favourite words are nothing much and ok i suppose!
the pant wetting could be a sign of his insecurity in the world as a pre teen, sometimes people who have had a tough time enjoy regressing to a time they felt safe and loved, this is a way of self nurturing/comforting. there is a whole fettish world of people who love wearing and using diapers for their intended purpose ok some do it for sexual self gratification, but others do it simply because they make them feel more confident or better about themself. you say he wets because he likes the smell/feeling, this could be a sign his inner child is insecure and needs some nurturing...mine was screaming insecurity at me for a while, by me talking to my inner child and letting her know i understand she was upset and by doing a few very young childish things in private every now and then for a while, everything settled down and now my inner child is usually pretty content. i say this because your son suffered a trauma in your break up from his daddy, and in that he probably grew up in some areas faster than most kids do hence an imbalancce between his inner child and the child he had to be/is now. this is not that uncommon in split parent kids. some cope better than others with this.
a lot of things in your post seem to lean towards asperges to me, the high functioning, lack of tears, lack of social skills, lack of understanding of social etequet etc. has this ever been discussed?
does your son show remorse when he has done something wrong or get cross/stroppy if things do not go how he wants/ thinks they should?
like i said at the begining i am only going off experience and 20yr old learning, not professional qualification, so i may be way off the mark. if i am i do apologise.
take care x

I would agree with those that suggest something on the autism spectrum. While some of them do not, many of the behaviors you listed remind me of my nine year old, who was evaluated in kindergarten and found to be on the spectrum.

Has his school not requested to evaluate him to put an IEP in place?

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