[Kylz74]

Hi

My name is Kylie and I have a 12yr old son who was diagnosed with ADD last year and is on Ritalin which has made a huge difference to his life, however he still has a very significant problem with organising himself. Yesterday I stumbled across an article on the Psych Central Website called Being Born a few weeks early affect learning and behaviour. My son was born at 35weeks and I truly believe that his planing organisational & motivational problems have been there since birth. Throughout his life he has had Occupational Therapy (to help with handwriting, fine motor & sensory processing problems etc), Physiotherapy & Speech Therapy. He has also seen a Psychologist who said that he is a bright kid who has developed a creative way to get out of doing work. We went to his first high school parent teacher night tonight and each of his teachers talked about him not doing his work or handing in his assignments and his poor organisational skills. My son says "it is too hard, no-one understands I can't cope". I was wondering if anyone could suggest how we can best help our son. I am now thinking about finding another Psychologist or are there other ideas on how I can best help my son. I also live in Australia.

Thanks

Kind regards

Kylie

[Victoria'smom]

Look into ASD. My son was improperly DX.

[Maranara]

I taught 12 year olds for over 20 years, and it is the absolute worst time for kids to have organizational issues. The best thing to do is for you and him to come up with a check list that gets checked off before he's allowed to come home, and if he has a locker at school, tell him that he has to bring all of his things home every night. That way, you can look through things together and determine assignments that need to be completed and such. Also, if his teachers will agree, get a day planner and have each teacher sign it at the end of class. Have him write down tests coming up, assignments, homework, etc, and have the teacher sign off on it letting you know of any particular issues that come up. If it's not signed by all of his teachers, he doesn't get to do whatever he likes in the afternoon.

It is possible he is gifted. It is common for very intelligent kids to get bored and stop working. It is too early, in my opinion, to conclusively label him with anything. Sometimes a system to help with organization and a system of reward/punishment if he doesn't follow through is all you'll need.

[Kylz74]

Hi Maranara

Thank you so much for those suggestions. I really like the idea of a checklist. It is interesting that you ask if he is gifted. His speech therapist identified that he is gifted when he was 4, so we had him tested and his in the mid range however because he does not produce any work his teachers don't extend him. His teachers are really concerned that he is going to fall behind because he can't keep up with the work. Counsellors and Educational Psychologists have said that he "is a bright boy who has worked out creative ways to get out of doing work". I just can't help thinking that it is more to it than that. It is almost like the motivational & organisational part of his brain is disconnected.

Originally Posted by Maranara

I taught 12 year olds for over 20 years, and it is the absolute worst time for kids to have organizational issues. The best thing to do is for you and him to come up with a check list that gets checked off before he's allowed to come home, and if he has a locker at school, tell him that he has to bring all of his things home every night. That way, you can look through things together and determine assignments that need to be completed and such. Also, if his teachers will agree, get a day planner and have each teacher sign it at the end of class. Have him write down tests coming up, assignments, homework, etc, and have the teacher sign off on it letting you know of any particular issues that come up. If it's not signed by all of his teachers, he doesn't get to do whatever he likes in the afternoon.

It is possible he is gifted. It is common for very intelligent kids to get bored and stop working. It is too early, in my opinion, to conclusively label him with anything. Sometimes a system to help with organization and a system of reward/punishment if he doesn't follow through is all you'll need.

[Maranara]

Originally Posted by Kylz74

Hi Maranara

Thank you so much for those suggestions. I really like the idea of a checklist. It is interesting that you ask if he is gifted. His speech therapist identified that he is gifted when he was 4, so we had him tested and his in the mid range however because he does not produce any work his teachers don't extend him. His teachers are really concerned that he is going to fall behind because he can't keep up with the work. Counsellors and Educational Psychologists have said that he "is a bright boy who has worked out creative ways to get out of doing work". I just can't help thinking that it is more to it than that. It is almost like the motivational & organisational part of his brain is disconnected.

That is common at his age and I wouldn't allow it to be a gigantic concern. At 12 years old, a lot of students are experiencing peer pressure for the first time and hormones are also starting to creep in to the picture. I have seen many, many students who were honor students in grade school, and then when they hit 12-13 years old, their concentration and organization goes to pot and they barely pass. Usually, by high school, say 15 or so, they are able to figure things out. I would just work out a plan to cope with it for now, which should include reducing computer/video game exposure (which have both been linked to ADD), and if things don't work themselves out in the next 2-3 years, then sound the alarm. My son has Asperger's Syndrome and a 16 is just starting to get it together. It is just too early to worry too much.