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#1
Nov 29, 2014, 06:19 PM
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Her dad signed her up for a modeling audition today. I felt obligated to take her because he keeps threatening to take her back from me. He wasn't charged with anything only his friends were but I have a bad feeling he has and would hurt her. I took her to the audition and she liked it, but I feel like it's not good for her recovery. They want her to model dresses and bathing suits. They had her in a tiny bikini and said right in front of her "we can photoshop out all of those scars." Am I overreacting or is this bad for her recovery?
They also wanted her bikini waxed. I do wax her eyebrows so she doesn't have a little unibrow but bikini waxing seems harsh. She also is taking it really seriously. She wouldn't eat much the last few days because she wanted to make sure she looked skinny. |
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#2
Nov 29, 2014, 09:33 PM
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What does her therapist feel? How about her mother?
Seems too soon, yet, seems her biological parents are reentering the picture and want their control back.  Sent from my LGMS323 using Tapatalk |
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#3
Nov 29, 2014, 09:56 PM
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Seems like another abusive situation. Not sure how to get out of it now though. :/
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#4
Nov 29, 2014, 10:22 PM
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Quote:
He doesn't actually want to take care of her. He just wants her sometimes. But at thanksgiving I caught him reaching up her skirt so if he tries to take her I will fight him. |
 healingme4me
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#5
Nov 29, 2014, 10:48 PM
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Quote:
Sent from my LGMS323 using Tapatalk |
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#6
Nov 29, 2014, 11:38 PM
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How does a 5 year old girl have anything to wax in the bikini area? What did you do when you found her father reaching up her skirt? Given her history, it seems like that should have been reported to the police.
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| Angelique67
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#7
Nov 30, 2014, 05:41 AM
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it is not good for her...i know you are struggling with meeting her father's demands so he doesn't take her....please report him...every single thing...
document every single interaction with him...i really believe he is using veiled threats to manipulate you...stand up to him! she needs to be protected!
__________________
 Children's talent to endure stems from their ignorance of alternatives. ~ Maya Angelou Thank you SadNEmpty for my avatar and signature.
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#8
Nov 30, 2014, 08:20 AM
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I took her to the audition. It is legitimate. But I'm worried the first time she's touched too close to a trigger area she will start being bad. |
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#9
Nov 30, 2014, 08:29 AM
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Last night I found her standing in the mirror picking at her body she hardly has any fat on her and keeps grabbing her skin and saying it needs to go or she won't be pretty.
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#10
Nov 30, 2014, 09:02 AM
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Csa manifests itself in many ways. Tell her father, this isn't in her best interests right now.
Sent from my LGMS323 using Tapatalk |
 livelaughlove22
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#11
Nov 30, 2014, 10:32 AM
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Did you report the incident with his hand in her skirt? If not... you NEED to report that. It doesn't matter if "nothing happened" but that it was the starting of something that could have happened. Report and record everything. Keep a detailed journal of what he says about the modelling, and report down all of her behaviours and things she says about it. And pay attention to her eating habits (and listen in the bathroom possibly to ensure she doesn't make herself start throwing up).
It's clearly already having a horrible influence on her. She's interested in it because she wants to feel like her dad loves her... and now she thinks to do that she needs to be "pretty" and in the modelling thing. That's a horrific enough experience for healthy, stable, confident girls in loving families... let alone this poor girl. And don't worry about her "being bad". No kid is bad - they can just make bad choices. Please don't ever tell her she's bad.... she'll incorporate that into her entire self-image. And if she DOES misbehave at the modelling thing? Well, that might turn out to be a good thing.. maybe they'll tell her she can't come back, and at least you'll have her removed from such a poisonous environment. Get the therapist and social workers involved in this - they should be having some say in what is a good choice or not for her.
__________________
"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
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#12
Nov 30, 2014, 11:51 AM
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Your first two posts said this:
"I am taking care of my friends 5 year old daughter for a while. Her and her ex husband are divorced and she recently discovered that anytime she's been at his house the past two and a half years, she's been sexually abused by him and his friends." How could you not CALL THE POLICE if he had his hand up her dress????? I am beginning to wonder about your posts, but can't figure out why you would want to deceive all of the wonderful folks here. |
| Angelique67, dinna-fash, Middlemarcher, unaluna, Yoda
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#13
Nov 30, 2014, 12:38 PM
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I reported it to the Prosecutor. She told me to not let him be alone with her under any circumstance. |
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#14
Nov 30, 2014, 12:42 PM
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Also, her therapist left town for the holiday so we haven't seen her in a week. I will ask her about it at her next session which is Tuesday. |
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#15
Dec 01, 2014, 07:17 AM
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Her therapist just got into the office and called me back right away. She's calling child protective services then getting us in today instead of tomorrow.
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| pachyderm
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#16
Dec 05, 2014, 02:49 PM
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I'm sorry that you feel that way. But I am not trying to fool anyone. There has been a lot that has happened out of my control. I am also not an expert so I don't know how to handle a lot of these situations. It's not easy. I've never had a child before her. I also do not post everything that happens. |
| Can't Stop Crying
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#17
Dec 07, 2014, 10:19 AM
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Get her therpist to write a letter that modeling is negatively effecting her mental health
__________________
Dx: Me- SzA Husband- Bipolar 1 Daughter- mood disorder+ Comfortable broken and happy "So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk My blog |
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#18
Dec 10, 2014, 10:44 PM
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The restraining order against her dad was lifted due to lack of evidence. Now she has to model again or he will try to take her away from me. She went today and was so scared. The people who hurt her used to take photos and videos of it and she froze up when she heard the flash. She ran to me and started crying and said don't make me do this. Her dad yelled at her for crying and ruining her makeup, called her bad and told her to grow up
 among other things.
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#19
Dec 11, 2014, 12:21 AM
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Is her father just trying to make some money off of her or what? I don't mean to sound irate, I'm just very confused as to why the system isn't more involved on her and your behalf. Last edited by Angelique67; Dec 11, 2014 at 02:16 AM. |
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#20
Dec 11, 2014, 06:36 AM
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#21
Dec 11, 2014, 08:21 AM
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I'm confused.
At least here where I live, if a child has been removed from their parents and are put into the care of someone else, then the biological parents don't get to have a say in things until the government decides to return the children to them. They don't even get to visit outside of the government-decided visitations, which are always supervised.
__________________
"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
| Angelique67
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#22
Dec 11, 2014, 06:12 PM
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Her mom willingly went to treatment and was asked if she wanted her daughter to be put under the care of a friend or relative. Social services cleared me as an acceptable household. As I have said many times her parents are divorced. As I have also said many times his friends are charged with hurting her. He will not be facing charges but at the time she was placed with me he was still being investigated. Now he has been cleared because there is no evidence to file charges. He does not want to keep her full time. Last edited by livelaughlove22; Dec 11, 2014 at 06:43 PM. |
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#23
Dec 11, 2014, 06:21 PM
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Are the people who abused her going to jail?
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#24
Dec 11, 2014, 06:42 PM
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| Angelique67
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#25
Dec 11, 2014, 11:29 PM
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Is anything going to be done about the father having his hand up her dress? |
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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