[coyotee]

My son just turned 4. He's very intelligent and has a good nature about him. As a result, I haven't had to enforce much discipline. Time outs work very well when he's frustrated and needs a break to calm down. But I just have no idea how to handle this:

He was very reluctant to use the toilet. We were very late with that. He's been officially potty trained now for about 6 months. But for the last few weeks he is absolutely obsessed with bathroom talk.

He talks about pee and poop with everyone he sees - family, friends, people at the store even, kids at the park. He writes those words down everywhere on every single piece of paper he finds. He thinks its funny and he jokes about it - that's reinforced when many people laugh with him at what he says.

I keep trying to reinforce the fact that those things are private and gross and he shouldn't talk about it unless he needs help from me or dad or the grandparents when he's in the bathroom.

My words aren't working. Timeouts aren't working. Ignoring it isn't working. I don't know what else to do. This phase is lasting a little too long and it's driving me crazy.

[MiddayNap]

Have you explained there is a time and a place for such humor? Telling a potty joke is perfectly acceptable when speaking with other little boys are being silly with close family, but shouldn't be shared in public or during supper, for example.

[Sabrina]

I can imagine this must be worrying. But it isn't "gross". It's normal bodily functions that all humans have to experience and I would hate for your little boy to think that it is gross. Certainly inappropriate to joke about at all times. Hope you can find the reason your boy is so intrigued with this process.

[Yoda]

I feel for you. Dealing with a toddler can be a challenge. But from my personal experience....... if you child is anything like mine you will wish for the toddler problems when your child becomes a teenager. My personal belief is they become tyrants when teen so we will be happy to see them move out of the family home.

Just my perspective.

[TishaBuv]

I agree with explaining about a time and a place for bathroom humor. I remember my kids asking why Daddy was allowed to use bad words and people on TV. I said 'they think that makes them sound like they really mean what they are saying and are trying to sound tough', but it's not polite and they shouldn't say bad words, especially not at school.

I told them it was OK for them to go into the bathroom and say bathroom words. They loved that!

[MiddayNap]

Originally Posted by Sabrina

I can imagine this must be worrying. But it isn't "gross". It's normal bodily functions that all humans have to experience and I would hate for your little boy to think that it is gross. Certainly inappropriate to joke about at all times. Hope you can find the reason your boy is so intrigued with this process.

I would imagine because, at his age, the act of communication and going to the toilet are fairly new experiences.

[TishaBuv]

BTW- This is a totally normal developmental stage and he will outgrow it.

[Patagonia]

I personally would totally ignore it. Yeah maybe use the broken record theory ....we use that talk in the potty...do you need to go?" Then ignore it.
I think this is testing grounds. Let's see where your limits are & how far they can be pushed. I have 3 kids & all have tested my limits.
Right now my 5yo is obcessed w: putting his middle finger up. Then giggles & looks to me. He's waiting for my reaction. I always ask him...did u hurt ur finger?" He knows from media, family, god knows where that putting it up means something bad. So he wants to explore that. Nothing like negative attention. So it's just a finger. No big deal.

I'd say relax & snicker about it. Take a deep breath when it gets under your skin. I know just that may be difficult.

My oldest got off the bus in kindergarten w/a brand new 4 letter word. Yeah the worst one. Lovely. That was hard to ignore too. We just didn't give the word any power & she lost interest.
Thank god!

[coyotee]

Originally Posted by TishaBuv

I agree with explaining about a time and a place for bathroom humor. I remember my kids asking why Daddy was allowed to use bad words and people on TV. I said 'they think that makes them sound like they really mean what they are saying and are trying to sound tough', but it's not polite and they shouldn't say bad words, especially not at school.

I told them it was OK for them to go into the bathroom and say bathroom words. They loved that!

Thank you!! This is really helping.

I wanted to completely cut out the bathroom humor, but now I'm seeing that it's not so bad when it's confined to the bathroom. Plus he gets distracted away from it when he actually has business to do in there

Originally Posted by Patagonia

I personally would totally ignore it. Yeah maybe use the broken record theory ....we use that talk in the potty...do you need to go?" Then ignore it.
I think this is testing grounds. Let's see where your limits are & how far they can be pushed. I have 3 kids & all have tested my limits.
Right now my 5yo is obcessed w: putting his middle finger up. Then giggles & looks to me. He's waiting for my reaction. I always ask him...did u hurt ur finger?" He knows from media, family, god knows where that putting it up means something bad. So he wants to explore that. Nothing like negative attention. So it's just a finger. No big deal.

I'd say relax & snicker about it. Take a deep breath when it gets under your skin. I know just that may be difficult.

My oldest got off the bus in kindergarten w/a brand new 4 letter word. Yeah the worst one. Lovely. That was hard to ignore too. We just didn't give the word any power & she lost interest.
Thank god!

I have been showing my emotions when I send him to the bathroom. I'm gonna use your technique now. Not outright ignoring it, but with a super calm expression, just pointing to the bathroom when that starts up, and that's that. This will help too. Thank you.

Thanks everybody for the replies. I've got a lot of good advice in my back pocket now to handle this sort of thing.

[AncientMelody]

Yup. Son kept talking about how he's going to flush me down the potty and it would drive me nuts "do not say that, it's not nice/not appropriate/etc

Now he's been saying it to little sister, and little sister thinks it's hilarious and they are going to both flush each other down the potty. And somehow it's a little exasperating yet amusing but not obnoxious. I guess the kid just had to find his audience. lol

[Patagonia]

Originally Posted by AncientMelody

Yup. Son kept talking about how he's going to flush me down the potty and it would drive me nuts "do not say that, it's not nice/not appropriate/etc

Now he's been saying it to little sister, and little sister thinks it's hilarious and they are going to both flush each other down the potty. And somehow it's a little exasperating yet amusing but not obnoxious. I guess the kid just had to find his audience. lol

OMG that's hilarious! Sorry I'd have to join into the frivolity there too!

[chimera17]

My 4 yr old's favorite phrase right now is: tooty butt. Absolutely everything is a tooty butt. He sings it in the car, he calls his sisters tooty butts, he called me a tooty butt face at once point. I believe he sings it at preschool too. The teacher says have patience, it is just a phase, and they give redirection/time-out style corrections in class, but it is driving me crazy! I'm on the verge of resorting to my mother's old method of washing out your mouth with soap, but I don't think that would have any impact.

I tried the whole 'potty talk is for the bathroom', which worked great on his older sisters when they were in a similar phase, but this lil guy is completely immune to such things. Going to try the suggestion to avoid emotion (probably impossible for me), but maybe that'll work. Hope you have good luck!!