Adopted son personifying stuffed animals? Part II

I wasn't sure if I should continue this in my other thread, but I decided to start a new one since it is (technically) about a new topic.

I posted yesterday about my adopted son's love of his stuffed animals and his penchant of using them to convey his opinions and ideas, as well as the fact that his therapist considers this a bad idea. I later decided to drop her and find someone else who can understand my son more, so today I thought would be my LR's last session with her.

DH and I dropped him off around lunch and went to pick him up an hour later, but when we got there he was in tears. I'm feeling emotional just writing this. It turns out his therapist took his toys away for the entirety of the session so as to force him to speak for himself. I am so unspeakably angry at her, but at least now I know I made the right decision.

What I really need help on is: LR has been unconsolable since then. We immediately returned Sergeant Bear and Raccoon to him, but I think the damage has been done. It's been ten-ish hours since we came home and he's still crying uncontrollably. I honestly don't know what to do, I'm in tears. DH has tried everything and I'm scared to do anything in case I upset him more. Someone please tell me what to do...

I know as a parent it's my job to handle my son by myself, but right now I feel less like a parent and more like a failure. I think if this continues I might have some sort of break down, and I just can't handle his heart-broken expression. The therapist completely destroyed any progress we made with LR, and now he's convinced that we'll take away his stuffies at any moment.

This was very pointless, I just need some help.

You should validate your sons feelings. That it upset him to have his T take his stuffies and that you are not going to do it. Given that his grandma also took his stuffies he may just be waiting for the next person to take them from him. Let him know that you are not going to take his stuffies. Ask him what he needs. Ask him to ask his stuffies what they need. I hope he clams down soon.

I'd let him know that no matter what she said to him she was wrong to take them and she was wrong to say anything about him needing to get along without them.

Wow! That T needs to be retrained.

I would reassure him that you are not going to take the stuffies away from him. Poor little guy has gone through so much. Talk through the stuffies to see if that helps calm him down, say he no longer needs to see "the bossy lady" (I have a few other names for her). Let him know that you understand that having the toys taken away was very scary. I would probably let him have tomorrow off school (he will be tired anyway) and spend time with him, hugging him firmly may help calm him down (deep pressure helps calm autistic kids and may help in this situation).



Also, you are 7 hours ahead of me, hopefully he calmed down enough to get some sleep.

Oh dear...

I've been sort of following you and your son in the last thread you made about his use of his stuffies. Is there any way you can, I dunno, lodge a formal complaint against this therapist? She obviously is much more than a "bossy lady" and the words I'd like to call her, I won't say. However, something must be done so she doesn't do this to another child.

I would just comfort him and reassure him that he won't ever lose his stuffies again. Hug him tightly like techgal said. Maybe allow him and his stuffies to do a special activity that he finds really enjoyable for a while.

I'm not a parent, but I do feel for you, as I have autistic tendencies myself, and am probably a very highly functioning autistic person or something.

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Hey everyone, thanks for your help.

I guess I was feeling pretty stressed out last night, and I figured someone would know what to do. Anyway, LR fell asleep not long after I wrote that, and when he woke up he was still a bit shaky, but his toys wanted to go for ice cream in our pyjamas and that's what we did (even though we did get stared at)! Ended up having a long conversation about what happened and then we had a cuddle when we got home, which I think has happened maybe twice before, if that.

He's watching TV right now with DH, so I figured I'd update you all and say thank you.

As for the therapist, I know the woman who owns their company (I know that's not the right word) vaguely, so I think I'm going to mention all of this to her. What she did was unacceptable, and you better bet there are going to be repercussions.

Thank you again.