What Would You Do?

Mostly goes to the library and reads. When he is willing to go to counseling and goes for a while plus shows some more positive changes--he might be able to return home. I am going to lean on my husband to help decide this. He won't admit anything is wrong with him but something is. Perhaps it is simply his attitude.

Miguel's Mom--I am taking all my medications (four of them) and now realize that coorperatively working with my PDoc and T is necessary for me. My paranoia of my husband and noncooperation with him was one of the things that caused my family's tragedy. Now my children aren't always very cooperative and that has hurt their transition to independence. I now preach the importance of cooperation to them. I think I am a lot better.

I am getting really involved in my VIPKids certification and am finding that that can be what consumes me rather than PC. I made a request to delete my account. I am ready to move on. I read your posts and many others. I learned from you. I like you and hope things get better for you. I will say a prayer for the people of PC that helped me now and then. So glad I came back a third time.

Could you get him into a day program? frame it as somewhere to go and meet new people...

I was taught from a young age not to trust the mental health system. My parent's threatened therapy and hospitalization more times than I can remember. I currently mistrust my husband because my issues aren't bleeding out to other areas. I'm trying to trust. Hopefully it'll come easier to my son. Thanks for giving me hope it can get better. Good luck and we're here for you when you need us

Thanks for your suggestions. Yes, during the past year, when our son exhibitted some odd behaviors, we did asked the police if he could be Baker Acted (committed for observation). The police advised to let them arrest him for trespassing instead (we declined). They thought he had an attitude problem, not a mental problem. It is actually hard to have this done once someone turns 18 unless you can show they are dangerous to themselves or others. My POV is that our son is usually a gentle, compassionate person. Sadly, he might be suffering from PTSD (which might start other things/"flip switches --don't feel qualified to diagnose) from my husband's "tough love" approach and my mental issues drama. I think when I was the one that kicked him out that that was really heartbreaking for him. It is hard to feel so rejected and abandoned. Also being homeless has caused him a lot of trauma. {We have ruined his life (I shouldn't think like this because my son also played a big role though we did make mistakes but we did a lot of good things for him too).} I will take whatever medications I have to take to calm my anxiety enough to deal with the mess we caused. I won't give up on him. My husband/his dad is not giving up either but his approach is much different than mine. It is still a tough situation because we view it so differently.

I remember how when I went inpatient voluntarily (but would have been sent involutarily if I hadn't volunteered)---I was terrified my rights/free will would be taken away. Our son does mistrust us because of this. Thanks for your reply.

I have admitted my part in the tragedy but of course it is more complicated than that. We all played a role and learning to work together is a work in progress. It could get messy and I don't want to spill anymore details about it on here. Things change. It's a roller coaster. Some of the things said to each other and in therapy should be private. I do not know how it will turn out but don't want to be tempted to give a "blow by blow" of the drama as it occurs.

Tisha, thanks for your hug. I will always be grateful for all the encouragement you consistently gave me.