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BalishBun
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Default Jun 15, 2008 at 12:05 AM
  #1
viewing choices... For all you parents out there (and anyone else who wants to give input), My husband has two children from a prior relationship. The ages are 4 and 6. The boy has behavioral problems. The girl (6) was already asleep, but the boy was still awake. I asked hubby what they were watching and he said "wrestling". I said "hello, what are you crazy? He is only 4 he does NOT need to watch that". Husbands response was "well I watched it at that age". What is everyones viewpoint about screening objectional material, and if so; what do you screen and what age, etc. Do you think its okay for a 4 year old who already has behavioral problems to watch wrestling? (and even if the 4 yr old didnt have beh prblms, would you still think the same), what methods do you use with your own children.... I basically have a bunch of related questions to this so maybe an answer and a ton of opinions, experiences, etc would help.

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Default Jun 15, 2008 at 12:17 AM
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I agree with you.. there is no need for him to watch wrestling even though most of it is staged. at this age he does not comprehend this. some nice family time would be a great wind down. I know its hard as a working parent to spent some quality time, but after all this is what creates nice memories..

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BalishBun
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Default Jun 15, 2008 at 12:21 AM
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Thank-you for your input I greatly appreciate it.

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Default Jun 15, 2008 at 01:54 AM
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While I too agree that a four year should not be watching wrestling - I have to say that sadly many fathers will feel differently that their wives do on this subject as they believe that wrestling is ok for any male at any age to watch.
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Default Jun 15, 2008 at 08:10 AM
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I feel that it is probably not possible to censor TV watching -- the boy will find a way to see it anyway. And that he knows you want to censor it will make it more fascinating in his mind.

I can think of things more objectionable than wrestling, anyway...

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Default Jun 15, 2008 at 09:25 AM
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I have to say I agree I spoke to hubby about it and he thinks different to me (with the amount of children we have I am surprised we havent had this discussion before lol) and I feel there is so much on telly including general cartoons where do you draw the line ? Boys will be boys and will play fight anyway. As long as the play fighting is monitered I dont have a problem with it.
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Default Jun 15, 2008 at 01:41 PM
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My husband watches wrestling (I think its their soap opera) and when the kids were young they watched it with him. My daughter still does. What I don't understand is why you are connecting his behavorial problems with TV. Are you suggesting that watching wrestling is the cause of his problems?

I too wonder where you draw the line. My boys all LOVED power rangers. At 2 they knew their colors because of power rangers. I used to love to watch the three of them play for hours re-enacting the "battles" that they saw.

And now that I think of it, they re-enacted the wrestling too. No one was hurt in this play. I don't know how big actual wrestling is in your community, but ours had a program for 4 year olds to beging training in wrestling. Our kids lost interest in it around 6 years of age, but it might be something to think about. They run off a bunch of energy, learn discipline, meet new people.

The show that I objected to (I just saw wrestling as stupid, not dangerous in any way) was South Park. My 7 year old was running around saying "you bastard, you killed Kenny" not knowing he was repeating a bad word. I threatened hubby's life if he watched it again with our kids in the room.

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Default Jun 15, 2008 at 04:31 PM
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AAAAA I actually don't think the wrestling is the cause of his problems, no, but i figured its probably something he would be better off not watching until hes older because oh his behavioral problems already. I am just the "step-mom" and a younger one "22" at that, and so I figured I would try and ask out for how other parents out there think, and if they do anything specific with their children as far as watching certain things. And btw that is a great way to put it.....
(wrestling is the guys soap opera) you are so right!

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Default Jun 16, 2008 at 09:36 AM
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I think you are on the right path as far as limiting what a 4 year old child watches on TV. Especially a child who already has behavior struggles. I also agree with what others have already stated in that the big time wrestling did not cause his behavior problems - but will do nothing to help.

My son had severe behavior problems when he was little (3 years old) and what we eventually discovered was that he had learning disabilities. He had difficulting regulating his emotions, understanding facial expressions, sensory integration disorder, and is dyslexic. He also had a great memory in that all he had to do was watch something one time and he had it memorized. And there are certain phrases within most movies that you just don't want your 4 year old repeating !

We watched Disney's Hunchback movie and there is a part in that movie where some poor guy was in the stocks and during the commotion of the gypsy getting away and all the guy was accidentally set free. The guy exclaims "I'm free !!". Then the guy trips and falls into a little cage and says "dang it". Well - didn't we just get to hear that little phrase ALL THE TIME.

We also noticed that our son would take on the persona of whoever the "strong" personality was in whatever he watched. If it was the prince in sleeping beauty then he was swash buckling the furnature, drapes, dog etc with anything that even resembled a sword. Which was certainly not a big deal at home but in daycare - that was a problem. Whenever my son would feel overwhelmed or believe that an injustice had just occurred .. he would swash buckle someone. And it didn't seem to make a difference to him how often he was punished.

Sorry this is so long, but my point is .. with a child like mine who was struggling with his behavior anyway .. and who was drawn to the "tough" guy persona as a role model .. the last thing I wanted was him watching big time wrestling or anything with Clint Eastwood !!

I totally think you are on the right path to limit aggressive TV/Movies and games from your step-son's viewing. Meanwhile, you and the child's father very much need to investigate how you can help this 4 year old manage his behavior.

p.s. my son is 14 now and he is doing great ! he watches movies that are PG-13 but the violent R rated movies are still off limits. ditto with the violent video games.
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BalishBun
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Default Jun 19, 2008 at 09:29 PM
  #10
thanks for the input viewing choices... I appreciate all the responses.

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Default Jun 20, 2008 at 12:05 PM
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Did you and his father come to an agreement about what the child was permitted to watch?

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Default Jun 20, 2008 at 08:28 PM
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I never let my kids watch wrestling mainly because I didn't want them trying to imitate the moves on each other and break each others necks or something. I did however allow the to watch Power Rangers and Jackie Chan. They also watched the Tell-a-Tubbies despite the controversy over the purple one. My personal favorite was taking my oldest to see his first movie...Pokemon The Movie.. It took me less than to minute tof "peeka...peeka...peekachu" to say WTF did I just pay 8 buck for?

I have two very active boys who fight like cat and dog regardless of what I let them watch on TV. I think the important thing is to set standards of behavior and the stick firmly to them. I am usually much more vigilant about other content such as treatment of women, making a thug look like a social activist and hero, and the reality TV. For me it is these shows that my kids seem to have trouble separating real from fiction. I also as much as I hate it sometimes, sit and watch or at least listen to what they are watching. I find myself oftentimes looking up from my book or what ever and making a comment like.... "what do you think about that? or Do you really think someone would act like that in the real world? or Wow, would you have done that if you were Josh?" What is currently beyond my capacity at the moment is keeping all of the Naruto characters straight. I think Cartoon Network is doing a good job of prepping my kids for taking Japanese in high school.

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Default Jun 21, 2008 at 05:52 PM
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We talked more about it, so will see where that goes. Random thought: In elementary school days, I would hang out with a boy my age and he was a major wrestling fan. He decided to try a wrestling move on me and bam it worked, he knocked the wind out of me! Im sure not every kid will try and imitate what they see but this one did, and wooooa yea it worked I'll never forget that one! So even though that incident happened, whether or not it happened wouldn't change my outlook on things that might negatively influence young children.

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Do not stand at my grave and weep; I am not there. I do not sleep. I am a thousand winds that blow. I am the diamond glints on snow. I am the sunlight on ripened grain. I am the gentle autumn's rain. When you awaken in the morning's hush, I am the swift uplifting rush of quiet birds in circled flight. I am the soft stars that shine at night. Do not stand at my grave and cry; I am not there, I did not die. R.I.P. Bandit 7-12-08 I love you I miss you.
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Default Jun 22, 2008 at 02:08 PM
  #14
When my older sons were younger they watched wrestling but not at age 4. I think you should trust your judgement. If the child cannot handle the program, and if he already has behavior issues, then he shouldn't be watching wrestling.

I think that we have to be very careful about what our pre-schoolers are exposed to. Get him some books and some crayons and paper and have some family interaction writing letters and reading them to one another! Board games also help develop literacy skills.

Good luck! viewing choices... viewing choices... viewing choices...

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Default Jun 22, 2008 at 02:18 PM
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LOL Chaotic! I’m the same way. Hubby would bring the boys to the movie they wanted to watch and I’d take my daughter (usually a better movie!). One time we went to see a sequel of the Pokemon movie and my daughter didn’t come with us so I went with the boys. Two minutes of Peeka peeka Peekachu and I turned to my husband and said “Is the WHOLE movie going to be this way?!?”

I also agree with you on setting standards of behavior and sticking with them. My kids know how they are supposed to behave. When I’m on the phone with a friend and hear her kids talking to her with absolutely no respect, like she’s some sort of hired help, it’s like nails on the chalk board. I tell her “if my kids talked to me like that I’d slap them right in the mouth.” I’ve never had to slap them in the mouth because this behavior was addressed when they were toddlers and a time out was the worst thing ever.

When they were younger I also watched what they watched and read what they were reading. And if you’re able to keep the Naruto character’s straight you get parent of the year award! “I’m always asking “who’s that guy with his hair straight up?” They’re like “they ALL have their hair straight up.”

My kids are older now, and one of my son’s took Japanese this year (my daughter was born there) and the animae (sp) did help him immensely. The writing part is difficult for him (he’s a lefty).

I’d love to have a portion of the money back from the millions of Yugeo cards. They all still play it. Older one goes to tournaments (geeky I know). But they have dozens of shoe boxes of those stupid cards. On the upside, it helped basic math skills. And memory! If someone could figure out how to put something like history or science into a game like that we’d have a generation of geniuses’.

I home schooled the twins their 8th grade year. (Algebra is the highest math subject that I felt comfortable teaching.) It was awesome. We had the minimum hours required by January. We were able to discuss everything! History, literature, science, it was so fun that hours would just get away from us. My husband would come home from work and we’d be “wow, 4:30 already?!? Ok, we need to finish this up before we end for the day.” I never had a problem with them doing their homework either, they were anxious to do it.

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Default Jun 22, 2008 at 08:45 PM
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<font color="purple">I remember when we were younger we watched wreseling...it's funny how just a couple of years ago it was less drama and more violence. Anyways, for better or for worse it affected us. Back when we lived with mom though we didn't have cable so we'd just rent movies. I remember my favorites were Ki ki's Delivery Service, Kimba the White Lion and tapes of Bill Nye the Science guy and The Magic Schoolbus.

lol AAAAA my brother still plays yu-gi-oh cards too (I just like to collect Pokemon cards for the pictures) and we both watch anime. I've tried learning Japanese but it's really hard finding the time to learn a language on your own. My poor parents had to watch Pokemon every morning with us and keep all the characters straight and go to the Pokemon movies when they were out and everything viewing choices... In my personal opinion we're pretty lazy kids but we're good too. I feel so bad for some parents though because their kids were so spoiled! On the flip side though I've felt bad for the kids though as I've been over at houses were the kids did all the work wile the parents just drank and smoked and watched TV all day.

...I give Pokemon partial credit for my steel-trap mind though because I memorized all 151 (at the time, now I think there are almost 500- a little more tricky to memorize viewing choices...) and their types, and what types they are good against and what they are bad against. Not to mention at the same time following the TV show every day and knowing exactly what was going on while all the adults were clueless. AND there is the card game, I just collected the gards and never played them...but aparently they are very good for math too! And well...a whole lot of other stuff too! There is alot of stuff that I memorized when I was little about those games so I could be one of the best kids at Pokemon in school. viewing choices... ...I was only 7 or 8! </font>
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Default Jul 10, 2008 at 01:00 AM
  #17
I would say no to wrestling....it is a violent sport.

TJ

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