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#41
It has got to be understood that spanking should be used as a last resort rather than a first resort.
After using methods such as time out with an explaination star charts with an explaination discussion with the child individualy and as a family, you reach the point where the child cannot have that thing explained to them because they just dont think that way. Then comes the time when cause and effect has to be shown to them because of the impact that it is having on the rest of the family, see Juran's 80:20 theory. To say that there should be no ultimate deterant means we need to ban capital punishment world wide and close all the prisons, and just have a chat with offenders. |
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Elder
Member Since Dec 2007
Location: The Netherlands
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#42
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#43
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Um... Just to you know, the sexual bullying has little, if anything to do with the fact that students are friends with their teachers. I've always been friends with my teachers, since elementary school even! (probably because I couldn't make friends with other kids ) in high school a lot of times we give them nicknames, call them by either their first or last name, and it's pretty informal. Only one or two teacher's think it's disrespectful so we just address them as Mr. or Ms. ____ In fact, it has the OPPOSITE effect on the students here, we want to get work done for them and we want to follow their rules not because we were forced into it but because you don't want to see a friend of your angry or disappointed in you. Unless they are just angry children to begin with, and then it seems no matter what the environment they would still hate their teachers, they would probably lash out even more (because they can't even handle being forced to do something they don't want to do here, imagine what they would be like with a strict school district!), and get kicked out of school. HOWEVER, even with that thinks like grabbing each other is NOT tolerated in schools. Maybe the only reason why it is happening is specifically because the teachers have no idea how to handle it. Maybe in that sense they are just plain bad teachers. Quote:
It's sort of like in Japan kids can bully their classmates litteraly to death and be extreemely rude, obnoxious and disruptive in class and they can't be diciplined because the teachers can't "interfere with their education" There have been a few fist fights, and a catfight or two, but the teachers are supposed to break them up... and hey, lucky for us we have some pretty buff staff around here, seriously, the principal has guns! (and by that I mean the slang term, no wepons in school after all, or anything that could be remotely used as one) We also have two cops in our school (I don't know about the UK, but in the US it's pretty common to have a cop or two in school) Oh, and I've always thought the no touch of any kind policy is not only rediculous, but unhealthy. I could understand some things but for god's sake you should at least be able to give your friend a high five when something awesome happened or give your friend a hug when they are hurting. Touching eachother in small, harmless ways like that during social interaction is just a part of being human. |
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#44
"Not all spanked children are abused, but all abused children were spanked."
I have never had to hit, spank, or do any physical punishment to have my children behave. Now they are great teenagers, they do good behavior because they realize that good behavior will get more attention than bad. Since I show them respect, since they were babies, they show me and others respect now. I know personally my friends who were spanked, just learned to do bad behaviors so they wouldn't get caught. We keep talking about the good old days. One hundred years ago parents were allowed to kill their children if they got out of hand. Hansel and Gretel was actually a true theme during those times and later. There are so many other ways to raise children now. We have to teach future parents of these, so they will know better. Not spanking doesn't mean that no discipline was used, just something different. Sure it might take more work in the beginning, but the future will become much easier, especially in the teens. Teens who are being respected during their childhood have no reason to rebel. |
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