Supporting family

lonely and scared · Jul 24, 2011 at 08:00 AM

I'm not sure if this is the right place to put this.
But I am a 19 year old who now seems to be paying for most of the bills and giving my mum money so we are able to survive the month.
I have been giving my mum a bit of money since I have been getting money. But now I am at uni and getting loan money and what not but it has become a bit more now. My mum is constantly asking for money and it is now leaving me strapped. I don't have a job as it isn't easy to find one, and with my uni course there isn't a lot of time.

danii24 · Jul 24, 2011 at 12:25 PM

your put under financail burden which is 2 much 4 u. while its good u give her something but getting loans out for her and leavin yourself broke isnt right.

Why is your mother so bad 4 money has she got a job?

SillySelf · Jul 24, 2011 at 08:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lonely and scared

I'm not sure if this is the right place to put this.
But I am a 19 year old who now seems to be paying for most of the bills and giving my mum money so we are able to survive the month.
I have been giving my mum a bit of money since I have been getting money. But now I am at uni and getting loan money and what not but it has become a bit more now. My mum is constantly asking for money and it is now leaving me strapped. I don't have a job as it isn't easy to find one, and with my uni course there isn't a lot of time.

SHE is the mother, not you. It is up to her to find ways to support herself and the rest of the family. If you are still living with her and she is short on cash, I could see giving her a little bit of money IF you had a job, but by no means should you be paying the FAMILY'S way. YOU are only responsible for YOU only. I know it will be hard, but you need to set up some boundaries with her. If you feel comfortable enough and have a little cash to spare, maybe you can give her a SET amount, and nothing else, and only what you could afford. That money is for school and your future. She is the mom. You need to look out for you. Do not let your studies suffer because of monetary reasons because of this. Also remember, YOU have to pay back those student loans. You really need to ensure your own success and not let things get in the way of that. You sound very promising and I wish you all the best. Be sure to post more if you need some more support or even just to vent. I am rooting for you.

lonely and scared · Jul 25, 2011 at 01:08 PM

She does have her own job but they cut back on what they paid her.
I just find it really hard to say no when she asks for it as if she is unable to pay for bills then that could lead us into some trouble and in debt.
This worries me as it could effect me later on.

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danii24 Veteran Member Member Since Jun 2011 Location: Ireland Posts: 374 12	Jul 24, 2011 at 12:25 PM #2 your put under financail burden which is 2 much 4 u. while its good u give her something but getting loans out for her and leavin yourself broke isnt right. Why is your mother so bad 4 money has she got a job?
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lonely and scared Member Member Since Dec 2009 Location: London England Posts: 168 14	Jul 25, 2011 at 01:08 PM #4 She does have her own job but they cut back on what they paid her. I just find it really hard to say no when she asks for it as if she is unable to pay for bills then that could lead us into some trouble and in debt. This worries me as it could effect me later on. __________________ Trust is like an eraser. It gets smaller and smaller after every mistake!!
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