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Member
Member Since Jul 2012
Location: England
Posts: 138
11 21 hugs
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Aug 01, 2012 at 12:00 PM
#1
For most of you in America may find that this is a good problem to have in a way. We are very very lucky to have a benefit system and to date it has enabled me to take long term sickness claiming Employment and Support Allowance (ESA) because I used all of my entitlement to sick pay. I can only claim for 12months because of my income, basically reclaiming my National Insurance payments which had been taken out of my wages by the government. My 12 months is up in September.
I also got Disability Living Allowance because I have a slipped disk and chronic pain I qualified for lower rate mobility and with PTSD, Anxiety and Depression and with me being at high risk of suicide I was awarded higher rate. This all came up for review this month. I am so proud to be British and have our benefit and welfare system and free NHS I cannot imagine how impossible it must be for you over there. You all should all vote for it if you ever get the chance. It does not come without its problems though...... Things here in the UK are all about austerity measures (saving pennies to pay back gov debts) so everyone who is not fully established in the benefit system are all having them stopped and forced to go through these crazy medical assessments. How on earth is a random nurse meant to establish the extent of my mental distress from a 10min meeting? They scored me nothing so now i have to attend a tribunal. I have an internal conflict at the moment, i am aware that I am my own attacker and in fact I have done more damage to my life and mind than they ever did. I have come to see it as an evil entity that lives within me which forces me to remembers and relive the terror over and over again. Creating a delusion of being there, experiencing is reality and therefore it is no longer an illusion, I am being hurt I am being attacked but it is not real is it. It happened when I was 9. So it is me... or at least someone/something sordid sodomising evil force. I tell you this because I came to see the tribunal as my sentence, if I was doing this to someone else they would lock me up. They cannot do that to me but I am a drain on the economy and the world so they punish me by stripping me of everything i have left. My home, my car.... ultimately my life because I won’t survive this i will end it before then. The unbelievable happened; the DLA reviewed my claim and said that they did not consider me physically or mentally ill. What does this mean???? How is inflicting this level of cruelty on myself not mentally ill???? This means I would have to attend a tribunal for this as well. But with the ESA stopping I do not have 12 months to wait for a tribunal. With both stopping I would be left with £2 a week to live off. I am unable to return to work because I can't leave the house or sustain any level of physical activity because of the slipped disk and anxiety and flash backs and dissociation. The stress of this on top of the emotional stress resulted in 3 large overdoses. I did get good news today, the disability (DLA) out of the blue, having just sent me a letter to say they reconsidered my claim and that they had awarded me nothing to three days later... a complete change of mind and from awarding me nothing for physical or mental health they have now given me lower rate mobility and higher rate care. They are playing with me, sick mind games this should be illegal although i dare not complain because i am so happy they changed their mind.... But they toy with me further, they have only awarded the care element for 6 months in case the mental health services have miraculously cured me of all this within that time. They take the mick they really do. So kept the wolf from my door for 6 months and i have to go through the fear of losing my home and car again whilst managing with all the mental health problems. Yet they get angry with me for having enough and wanting to bring everything to a swift end. Has anyone else been played with like this by the government and find that they are actually making me sicker and forcing them to take actions like massive overdoses because the only other option is utter stripping of everything I have left? Is there any hope? How do you manage? How do you get them to hear your pain and give you a break? I did well in school, went to uni, had a good job in which I was a workaholic but now had a mental break down I am not a work dodger yet they treat me the same as the benefit bums, why do they play with us like this? Don't they know its cruel torture? __________________  *********MINEFIELD 
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