I live in a world of desperados (& don't like it)

(1) I am poor. I have on $800 of SSDI per month. I live in a slum neighborhood, in an apartment.
(2) I have realized that virtually of the factors in my life that are troubling, disturbing, stressing and upsetting me are due to the fact that I live in a social environment of people who can be called "desperados.'
(3) The term "desperados" (Spanish for "desperate ones") was first used for the outlaws who lived on both sides of the Mexican border back in the days of the Old West. Desperados, because they had no regular way to earn a living, resorted to lying, cheating, stealing and sometimes killing, to survive.
(4) I live in a modern city in the USA. But I do not live among normal people. I live among modern-day desperados. From my apartment manager, to the others who live in my apartment complex, to the staff at the community mental health center where I go, to the state welfare office where I have to sometimes go, everyone is a desperado. Everyone is poor, and financially desperate. This creates lots of lying, cheating, brutality, bullying, stealing, hating, crime, and cliques and gangs.
(5) I am sick of this. I am sick of living among desperados. In my pre-mental illness life, I lived among people who more normal, who had good jobs and lived in good neighborhoods and had good family lives. It is getting hard for me to remember that there is a world were everyone isn't so dishonest and so hateful. Jesus, I want out of this world of desperados.

"Be the change you wish to see in the world"
~ Gandhi

Give love and it comes back to you.

Look for the good and you will find it (and you will BE it).

Extend yourself and you will grow.


I am not discounting your assessment of your situation, only reminding you that the only angle you can come from is you. Do something good for someone today and see if you don't feel a touch better. In a sense, love is a selfish prospect.

If you have good internet access and some research skills then maybe you can look into the possibility of relocating outside an urban center. There may also be an urban alternative. Not all poor neighborhoods are full of desperadoes. Good luck

What you wrote is true sometimes, for sure. But did the Jews deserve to the the Holocaust done to them by the Nazis? I don't think so. Did the Africans deserve to be kidnapped and shipped to the Americas to be slaves? Did the people in the 9/11 events deserve to be murdered by terrorists? Give love to bad guys doesn't always work, or, doesn't work at all.

Woah there, I don't see where it was implied any of those things were deserved. I think the point was more getting to caught up in bitterness towards others really doesn't help things a whole lot...so sometimes it is better to instead focus on ones self and things they can do to feel better or make their life more pleasant.

Well, Maria in "The Sound of Music" has a positive, loving attitude. The captain and his children came to love her. But all of them had to flee the Nazis and flee Austria, and come to the USA. Hitler and his henchmen were not going to be won over by singing and smiles.

Either way a hateful negative attitude doesn't solve any problems either really but yeah I certainly don't think you should delude yourself into thinking everything is perfect and just 'be happy' in your current situation but you don't want to get to caught up thinking about your anger at people around you to the extent it consumes you was more my point...best thing to do would probably be focus on finding some way to maybe move to a better location. I'd just hope you keep in mind not all struggling poor people act the way you describe, its unfortunate there are a lot like that where you live though, worst I've had is the occasional homeless person b***ing if I don't have change to spare which is very rude.

Your story resonates with me! I recently descended the social/class ladder at a very rapid pace. It is a very hard pill to swallow. I now live in a ghetto neighborhood and the goings on by the desperados around here are indeed something to see. My plan is to make my stay short as possible. I try to fill my day with dreams and plans of my exodus as visualization has been key to seeing me through tough spots in the past. Research and seek out all options to lift yourself up and out of your position. Goodluck to us both!

Do you know anyone from your pre-mental illness life you can live with, relatives, etc.? My cousin, in her 50s still lives in the home she grew up in in the City, helps her 85 year old mother, has friends and activities within walking distance (a good outreach church), etc. Familiarity of surroundings can help a lot when thinking about the desperados around.