Renting apartment 1st time don't know how

I've been on disability since my early to mid 20s and at 38 I'm finally thinking of moving out of my parents house. I have no clue how to live on my own.

I have been paying them rent to have the upstairs for my own place (no bathroom, but i do have a fridge and sink, all utilities included). I also pay towards car insurance to have use of their second car and I pay for whatever gas I use in the car.

I have Bipolar 2 and fibromyalgia (and maybe PTSD? Just recently had that given as a possibility by my psych).

I don't always do well alone, I forget to do necessary things and shut down when I get stressed, but i really want to try at least to see if I could live alone in my own apartment without roommates.

But I have no clue how much of my monthly $800 to use towards rent, or if is even possible to rent anyplace on my own with that being my only income. I do get SNAP (food stamps) and have Medicare and Medicaid. I highly doubt I could handle a part time job to supliment this but if I could I don't even remember how much I'm allowed to earn with disability. Last time I worked I ended up in the hospital after months of extreme depression and ocasional hypomanic episodes where I would work non stop and felt I was losing my mind.

TW!..... [[(literally I thought I was going to snap and do some of the crazy **** that my brain was churning out!) The emergency department did an involuntary inpatient admission after they heard I had suicidal and homicidal intrusive thoughts.]]....

Anyway... I know I need to ask my therapist about getting help and guidance from a case worker or something, but i was just wondering what guidance you guys might have from personal experience.

My therapist mentioned some programs that have rooms with some supervision and then you move to an apartment type setting but still have some kind of supervision.. we didn't get into that very much, as I popped out with my grand idea for a new treatment option and ended up getting sent to emergency department for evaluation as I was clearly going towards hypomania.

TW!....[[(note to self do not offer self harm as an alternative "self treatment plan" and also mention recent suicidal & homicidal ideation, you will get a visit to the ED. I didn't end up inpatient thankfully and I actually calmed down from my hypomania by the afternoon.)]]...

Don't worry I still will mention those things to my therapist if they happen again. I know honesty is the only way I can get the help I need, even when I don't always realize I need help.

As I read over my other posts I question my fitness to be on my own
Lol!

Why stress yourself by moving out? Sounds like you have a good environment.

Oh I guess I forgot to add the reason for feeling a need to move out..
My parents own mental health problems are causing me to get very stressed and triggered a lot. Especially my father who has always been manipulative and emotionally abusive (he has no diagnosis as he refuses to see a Dr. But a marriage counselor that my parents went to briefly felt that he had some signs of narcissistic personality disorder). My mom has CPTSD and my mental health can trigger her and then we both fall apart. So I'm thinking at least trying to remove myself from the toxic environment my dad creates, and the constant worry about my own behavior triggering my mom, could be healthier.

I think you need to talk to public housing in your area cause $800 is not enough to rent a studio most places. The program you mentioned would be a good start and an excellent place to get experience at being on your own.

Living on your own for the first time is an extremely stressful undertaking even when you aren't symptomatic. $800.00 isn't enough for rent, utilities, your phone, transportation, and life's incidentals. Plus it isn't just rent. It's the security deposit and last month's rent you have to pay up front. If you have a pet, there is a pet deposit. If you think you qualify for a supervised living situation, you need your psychiatrist and a social worker to do all that paperwork. Also waiting lists are long. You could wait a year or more for a placement.

The way this works is if you already have a home and it isn't an emergency homelessness problem, you'll be put at the bottom of the list. I have two sisters living in group homes. One got her placement because the state hospital she was long term placed in closed her wing. It was a direct transfer state hospital to group home. My second sister was in a nursing home for years with MS and psychiatric illnesses until a group home opened up for her. She was considered low priority because she had a bed in a nursing home.

I can understand the stress of living with mentally ill parents, but it doesn't sound like you are in the best space to live on your own. You can get the paperwork started for a supervised living arrangement, but just know it'll be a long wait.

Do you live in the city?
7 Different Housing Options for Disabilities in NYC - Jason's Connection

Quote:

Originally Posted by Isurvive I've been on disability since my early to mid 20s and at 38 I'm finally thinking of moving out of my parents house. I have no clue how to live on my own. I have been paying them rent to have the upstairs for my own place (no bathroom, but i do have a fridge and sink, all utilities included). I also pay towards car insurance to have use of their second car and I pay for whatever gas I use in the car. I have Bipolar 2 and fibromyalgia (and maybe PTSD? Just recently had that given as a possibility by my psych). I don't always do well alone, I forget to do necessary things and shut down when I get stressed, but i really want to try at least to see if I could live alone in my own apartment without roommates. But I have no clue how much of my monthly $800 to use towards rent, or if is even possible to rent anyplace on my own with that being my only income. I do get SNAP (food stamps) and have Medicare and Medicaid. I highly doubt I could handle a part time job to supliment this but if I could I don't even remember how much I'm allowed to earn with disability. Last time I worked I ended up in the hospital after months of extreme depression and ocasional hypomanic episodes where I would work non stop and felt I was losing my mind. TW!..... [[(literally I thought I was going to snap and do some of the crazy **** that my brain was churning out!) The emergency department did an involuntary inpatient admission after they heard I had suicidal and homicidal intrusive thoughts.]].... Anyway... I know I need to ask my therapist about getting help and guidance from a case worker or something, but i was just wondering what guidance you guys might have from personal experience. My therapist mentioned some programs that have rooms with some supervision and then you move to an apartment type setting but still have some kind of supervision.. we didn't get into that very much, as I popped out with my grand idea for a new treatment option and ended up getting sent to emergency department for evaluation as I was clearly going towards hypomania. TW!....[[(note to self do not offer self harm as an alternative "self treatment plan" and also mention recent suicidal & homicidal ideation, you will get a visit to the ED. I didn't end up inpatient thankfully and I actually calmed down from my hypomania by the afternoon.)]]... Don't worry I still will mention those things to my therapist if they happen again. I know honesty is the only way I can get the help I need, even when I don't always realize I need help.

Thanks for the info. Yeah I think I'd be worse off if I moved right now to unsupervised totally on my own, as my symptoms are cycling a lot! Way more than they ever have since I started bipolar meds 15+ years ago. And I kinda figured that the wait list would be long for the supervised places. Gotta figure out ways to get out of the chaos more often and keep working on getting more stabilized again.
I was in a hypomanic eppisod when the thought of moving out came up... So I was like yup I need to do that asap! Now I'm back down of off the hypomania I'm going to refocus towards other copeing mechanisms, but I am going to ask my psych care team to start the paperwork for one of those group living places, they said if I'm not in a stable enough place to move when my name comes up I just get bumped back onto the list.

Nope not in the city. I live upstate NY way in the middle of nowhere. It's 30 minutes drive to anything. I'm a country girl Lol!