[Akyra]

So I'm biologically female.
Up until I got my first period (11 years) I pretty much thought that since I didn't have a penis, my mom must have asked the doctors when I was born to make me a girl, which disappointed me, but I figured if that was what my mom wanted then I would have to live with it. I played with the guys, I hated pink, blue was the best. Sparkles were dumb, dirt was cool. I loved playing soccer; gym was my favorite part of school. I was really upset when I got my period, I cried, and was so embarrassed.
After that I started hanging out with girls more often. I was a girl, so I should hang out with girls. I still thought about being a boy though. How great it would be.
When I was 13 I found out about cosplay. It made me so happy. I could dress as a boy without anyone really questioning it. So I did that. I bound my chest, put on a wig, and went to the mall. It was great. (Besides the fact that I used an ACE bandage and it hurt so badly)
When I was 14 I cut almost all my hair off. I loved it, but I dreaded going to school because of how people would react. A lot of people freaked, saying how my long hair had been so beautiful, but I was glad to get rid of it. I've kept it short since then.
My grandmother always makes remarks like, "You're not turning boy on me are you?" and "You're too pretty to be a boy." When she says that it feels like I'm being punched in the gut.
I'm 16 now. Still young. I like both boys and girls. I think I'm trans. I don't know... Being a boy sounds so right.

[ishiru]

there's pretty much pretty boy out there .you're the same w/ me besides i'm your opposite gender

from my thought, family always wanted their son/daughter be normal.so it's hard being ourself as long as they still around..there always a way

Sent from my LG-E988 using Tapatalk

in my opinion.... you sound too young to be making such a huge decision.

just give it time and live the best life that you can. and worry about the sexual stuff after you are 18-20ish

[SeekerOfLife]

Please ignore the stereotypes of what a girl is supposed to be/look like/dress like.....You are a girl who likes sports, nothing wrong with that. Don't let other peoples opinions confuse you about what a girl is supposed to be like.

When I was in my teens, I very much resented that I was a girl. I loved sports, but had this idea that I could not participate in sports because of my period. (Might spring a leak). Eventually, by about the age of 21, I was glad I was a girl. Girls are cool! We can do all this great stuff with our hair. Girls have a nice shape (I mean that in a proper way). Be yourself. Genetically, you are female. Love it. Love yourself. Be yourself. Accept yourself.

[cybermember]

Hey Akyra,

If it feels right to be a boy then that's okay. That's what you feel. Don't let anyone tell what you feel. Those are your feelings and if it feels right to be a boy then so be it.

[cybermember]

Originally Posted by Useless Me

in my opinion.... you sound too young to be making such a huge decision.

just give it time and live the best life that you can. and worry about the sexual stuff after you are 18-20ish

Gender identity has nothing to do with sexual stuff.

"you're too pretty to be a boy" would be like someone said "you're too butch to be a girl", I know how that could feel. If you feel like you want to have short hair, then do it, people will accept it sooner rather than later, and if they can't, too bad for them.

It's great you found cosplay to express yourself, and I might be wrong here, but I think girls have more freedom to express themselves than guys. i'm no expert, but I suggest try be as much as yourself as you can.

Originally Posted by cybermember

Gender identity has nothing to do with sexual stuff.

You are correct. When I said "sexual" - I meant not just the act, but the body parts as well.

Sorry that I was unclear on my statement.

[Perna]

Gender identity can take awhile to decide on; no rush. I remember when I was 5 (back in the ancient 1950s) and we had to wear dresses, anklet socks, mary jane shoes, etc. to school and in the winter, I had a huge, snow suit with leggings, etc. and I remember crying when I got into the kindergarten classroom because I had to take off those leggings. I wanted to be "comfortable" and in pants so much. Obviously you are sexually female and pretty much gender female but what you want to identify with is your choice, gender is a "taught"/society thing and it is easy to look at the others and decide they are more comfortable or just "freer" in some way. I would wear a tie over to visit my grandmother see how you enjoy dressing up like a grown male instead of just hanging around in generic clothes and having easy-to-care-for hair. What's not to like about that?

[-jimi-]

Originally Posted by Useless Me

You are correct. When I said "sexual" - I meant not just the act, but the body parts as well.

Sorry that I was unclear on my statement.

So no one should feel if they are boy or girl until they are adult?

Is that how it usually works? Um, don't think so.

[Spiced]

Originally Posted by seekersinking

Please ignore the stereotypes of what a girl is supposed to be/look like/dress like.....You are a girl who likes sports, nothing wrong with that. Don't let other peoples opinions confuse you about what a girl is supposed to be like.

I have to echo this sentiment really because I completely agree with it.

Don't let stereotypes get to you whatsoever, Akyra.

I know that's easy for me to say when I'm not the one dealing with the same issues as you, but I do think about something similar. I only wish I were a braver and more confident person to be able to do it.

I really enjoy wearing high-heeled boots. I think they look great, they feel great, I can walk in them well and they make me feel pretty empowered. Cosplay helped me a lot as well because I can cosplay my favourite male characters, but I can also attend conventions as my favourite female characters and be more respected and treated as my own person than anything else.

With that being said, I'm a completely straight guy with a girlfriend of three years. I just hate the fact that society says guys can't wear heels without being publicly ridiculed, so I can completely understand feeling scared or worried of being stereotyped.

I was at College a few years ago and was close friends with a girl there, but she wanted to change gender and be referred to by a name of her choice. From then on we all treat her the way she (still feels weird referring to him officially as a she) wanted to be treated and we never bat an eyelid.

My best advice is to try your absolute hardest to drive those stereotype fears out of your mind and focus on what you want, and not what society says you have to want. We're only here once, and while it's easy for me to say, I think we should all make the absolute most of it and make ourselves as happy as possible. Otherwise what are we taking to the grave? nothing.

Tell you what - you work on being the person you want to be, and I'll work on working up the courage to go out into public wearing my heels. Let's make ourselves as happy as possible.

All the best, and stay happy.
x

[Tenrin]

Akyra,

You may very well be trans*. Or, there's a chance you may not be. Some people do question their gender identity for a while and then come out of it having decided that they identify with their birth sex the most, or that they are genderqueer (which is still trans but not binary). You totally have to be the one to figure this out though, because no one else really knows. No one else has been inside your head.

I don't know how much you already know, but I'm assuming you're fairly new to this subject. Do research. There are many ways to be trans*. Like I said above, some people identify as other, non-binary identities such as bigender, agender, etcetera. You could also read/watch other trans* people's stories and see how much you can relate to them.

You could try thinking about the future. If you don't think you could stand living the rest of your life as your birth sex, and think that you'd be much more comfortable as a man, that could be an indication that you're trans*. And if you've felt like this for most of your life, that could be an indication. And of course, you should try to figure out why you feel like you do. Some women wish they were male because of various advantages that men tend to have. (You know... for example, in some places/cultures women have next to no rights and are basically owned. So they might wish they were male in order to have rights.) If you just feel like you're inherently male, that could be an indication that you're trans*.

Honestly you sound a good deal like me. I'm a trans guy. I'm not much older than you either (17). I can really relate to a lot of the things you said. The period (hate just typing that word--ugh), the hair, feeling like it'd be so great if I were physically male. And my own grandma says things just like yours, and I feel hurt and insulted by it.

I've still got to emphasize that it's up to you to figure this out, which can be hard and frustrating sometimes. But there's not really anything else for it. Good luck.

@Useless Me:

You have no idea how often young trans* people hear things like that (and how darn sick of it we are). By the time you're in your late teens, you usually pretty much know whether you're a boy or a girl inside. It's understandable for us to be confused because we've been told all our lives that we're something we feel we're not.

@seekersinking:

You make a good point about the stereotypes, but that doesn't mean the OP is a girl. Being genetically female doesn't make you a girl, and you are not your body.

@cybermember:

"If it feels right to be a boy then that's okay. That's what you feel. Don't let anyone tell what you feel. Those are your feelings and if it feels right to be a boy then so be it."

Amen to that!