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Old 01-19-2021, 01:15 AM   #1
~*glass_owl*~
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Blush does this make me bisexual?

I've only dated cis-gendered men and had sex with them, but I've had some experiences with women. I made out with another woman at least once when I was drunk and I can't remember if more happened. I was sober when I let a woman use s&m tools on me. The same night I wouldn't let a woman go down on me. nor that woman. I can't really say that I've had crushes on other woman, but I am sometimes drawn to their faces or see that they are attractive, but they do nothing for me. This one woman touched me when I was sober as we were dancing and I was turned off and I took her hands and shoved them off me and made out with the first guy I could see. But that one woman at the s&m club makes me think, we almost had a threesome with this guy and I turned it down (I didn't know any of them and it felt weird). It seems like I'm bi for this fetish, but not for anything else.
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Old 01-19-2021, 01:51 AM   #2
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Default Re: does this make me bisexual?

It can be difficult to work out, and at the end of the day itís really what you feel comfortable with when you want to describe your sexuality. I think if you havenít met a woman you felt an innate urge to take to bed (and/or want to have a romantic relationship with - romantic and sexual attraction go hand in hand for most people, but are actually separate things. Thereís also aesthetic attraction where you just like a personís appearance and not much else... human attraction is pretty complex, really!), youíre likely not bi, though.
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Old 01-20-2021, 12:03 AM   #3
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Default Re: does this make me bisexual?

That makes sense, thank you for your advice!
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Old 05-02-2021, 12:37 PM   #4
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Default Re: does this make me bisexual?

Are you sexually attracted to women?

It sounds like the answer is no. I would honestly say you're probably not bisexual.

Our society heavily sexualizes women. It seems common for many to feel this way about women without being sexually attracted to them. I'm not saying it's right or wrong - but it is a thing. I even know bisexual women who say they would never pursue a romantic relationship with a woman but are only sexually attracted to them (I know not everyone who is bisexual is like that, but it is a thing) and honestly, I feel this, too, goes back to society sexualizing women so much.

To me it sounds like your attraction is purely aesthetic. Attraction exists on a spectrum. You can be romantically attracted to someone without sexual attraction, or sexually attracted without romantic attraction. You can be aesthetically attracted to someone, too.

I identify as bisexual only because it's easier, I think. But honestly I'm only romantically attracted to women (and sometimes aesthetically). Sexually speaking, they do little for me and I've only ever been sexually attracted to men (and literally only like 2). If I were to get into technicalities I'd probably be biromantic not bisexual.

Sexuality is confusing, only you can define yourself.

ETA: I want to add that fetishes are a unique thing. You can, indeed, be into a fetish but not necessarily sexually attracted to the person doing it. This is very common in the community, and totally okay and accepted.
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