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ducky86
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Default Jan 09, 2014 at 06:44 PM
  #1
My girl feel like she is blah. She woke up on new years day and said that all of 2013 hit her hard. Last year we did not get into 1 argument then out the blue she says she is depressed. She constantly tell me that she loves me but it just feel really different. She also asks me to be patient while she goes through this but she says that she has to do it alone. Im just confused and still feel like I did something. But it feels as if I have to force her to tlk to me and she swears she dnt think she does. Wat should I do? I love this girl but this funk is depressing me....
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Default Jan 10, 2014 at 07:11 AM
  #2
I would say it depends on the nature of the depression. If it's just, as they say, "a case of the blues", then being supportive and giving her the emotional strength she needs is probably the best medicine.

If she doesn't come out of it soon though, it might be a clinical depression (like mine is Major Depressive Syndrome) and she'll need help. If that's the case, her depression would be mainly due to chemical problems in her brain and therapy and possible medication could be needed.

Overall, I would suggest being as supportive as possible, do things for her that will help her self-esteem (like praise for achieving little goals and such) and just being there for her when she needs you. If it goes on for more than a few weeks though you should talk to her about maybe seeking some help.
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ducky86
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Default Jan 10, 2014 at 11:16 AM
  #3
She went to the doctor to see maybe wats wrong. The doc put her on a low dosage of anti depressant and scheduled a therapist session later on this month. She says she is making an effort and im trying to be supportive but little things like I would go buy her flowers or candy or just things to make her smile....and its just a blah response...I love this girl and will go through anything with her. Should I plan on going somewhere with her like I wanted to this month? Even if she constantly tells me she have no energy?
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Default Jan 10, 2014 at 12:57 PM
  #4
Really, she can't react like she normally would. The brain of someone who is depressed shows very little activity compared to someone normal. So basically, her brain cells aren't talking. It's like trying to play basketball with a broken leg. You can put in all the effort in the world, but with that snapped leg, you aren't going to jump.

Do keep doing the things you're doing. It will reinforce in her that she is loved and cared for. Also, consider some help for yourself in some way so you don't get pulled down as well. You can't help her if you're emotional strength is gone.

As far as going out this month, I would suggest still planning on it. Again, getting out and things will help reinforce that there are people there for her that want her around. She won't have any energy because her brain isn't firing on all cylinders, but that's just something you have to keep in mind.

Best of luck!
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Default Jan 10, 2014 at 01:18 PM
  #5
Thank u for the help...
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Default Jan 10, 2014 at 01:36 PM
  #6
One more question? Does this mean I should be understanding and deal with the no affection coming from her? Like I feel like when she kiss me that it is forced....also no sex but its only been a week.
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Default Jan 10, 2014 at 02:53 PM
  #7
I guess my biggest fear is she will try and find that happiness with someone else that we shared before she started feeling like this. I mean our only thing in the whole year of dating is this issue right now. I dont know...im second guessing her feelings toward me now because of the lack of affection...
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Default Jan 13, 2014 at 07:06 AM
  #8
Quote:
Originally Posted by ducky86 View Post
One more question? Does this mean I should be understanding and deal with the no affection coming from her? Like I feel like when she kiss me that it is forced....also no sex but its only been a week.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ducky86 View Post
I guess my biggest fear is she will try and find that happiness with someone else that we shared before she started feeling like this. I mean our only thing in the whole year of dating is this issue right now. I dont know...im second guessing her feelings toward me now because of the lack of affection...
Exactly. Right now, even though she still loves you the same as she did before and all that affection is still there, she's just not capable of showing it. It's there, just be patient and it will come out again.
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