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Community Support Team Chat Leader
Member Since May 2001
Location: Greater Boston, MA
Posts: 13,544
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#1
Hi folks,
While this is indeed a forum and safe place for men to post about their own thoughts and reflections on their own recovery and interactions with members of the opposite sex, I would remind members to try and err on the side of being respectful of that opposite gender. You can express your opinions about others without resorting to gross characterizations or generalizations that really are meaningless. I would never refer to any large group (and certainly not one that constitutes 50 percent of the population) with a generalization that doesn't capture the complexities of them. I would ask you not to either. This isn't meant primarily as a place to vent, but rather a place to better understand our interactions with the other opposite sex and to share our own insights and thoughts along those lines. Thanks for your cooperation and understanding. DocJohn __________________ Don't throw away your shot. Last edited by DocJohn; Nov 06, 2015 at 09:19 AM.. |
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CoffeeLove, LifeIsCruel, Mike_J, RenouncedTroglodyte, Skeezyks
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Member
Member Since Nov 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 451
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#2
note taken, I promise not to flame the men
__________________ Diagnosis: Free Thinker - Daydreamer - Campaigner -Animal lover - foodie - anti-psychiatry - anti-labels Medication: food, air and water |
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#3
OK, I can agree with that, but wasn't this section of the forum originally meant to be for all men-focused support, including male-specific health problems and everything? It wasn't designed to just speak about women, not so?
So, I think what's happening is, when someone does post something about the opposite sex, it will most likely be a very challenging thread and possibly a vent, and when one considers the male-psyche in general, and our tendency to keep quiet about stuff that bothers us, I would say if it were on here, it's definitely serious enough that the guy felt he had to post about it. I am not arguing or anything, but I personally would say it'd be good for a guy to get something out, and women shouldn't be reading this forum in the first place, and get offended, and I assume, complain about it to the powers that be. If they are, then they need to be able to handle what they read, unfortunately. If one chooses to open a Pandora's box, be prepared to be shocked, because one was warned beforehand that opening it would change one for life. Kinda reminds me of a certain lady who couldn't resist eating fruit from a certain forbidden tree, many thousands of years ago, if you know what I mean. There needs to be an understanding that certain things can never be unlearned once learned. So, I think the onus should lie on the individual curious enough to "sneak a peek" even after being advised not to do so. |
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bighands, DeterminedSlacker, emgreen
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Member
Member Since Jul 2015
Location: U.S.
Posts: 267
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#4
Quote:
So in effect, a handful of women were given veto power over what gets posted in the Men's Support forum, which seems rather absurd to me. What if there's a guy (not me) who hates all women and needs to talk about it? How does one do that "respectfully"? Should he just simmer in silence? Doesn't seem very "safe" to me, or particularly healthy. I for one am less likely to post if I feel that I have to be so careful about what I type, for fear of offending someone for whom the forum wasn't even designed. The same holds true for the women's forum; if there's a lady out there who just plain can't stand men, why shouldn't she be able to say so within the confines of a "safe" support structure? I really don't think most men would be bothered by it. I wouldn't. |
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bighands, DeterminedSlacker, emgreen
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Member
Member Since Oct 2015
Location: NY
Posts: 221
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#5
Well put. We can't expect a man to try to come to terms with his feelings towards women, as dark as they may be, if he's scared of offending women who aren't supposed to be reading his posts in the first place. Some men do truly battle misogyny and hatred towards women, be it from parental abuse or an abusive partner. If he can't let his feelings out, which sometimes include rage and hate, then he will have them brewing inside himself instead of being able to receive constructive advice in a safe space for men to vent.
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4in1, emgreen
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Member
Member Since Mar 2012
Location: Mid-Atlantic
Posts: 304
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#6
And over in the women's forum, they're insulting men in Doc John's note. That makes things MUCH better.
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Daystrom, DeterminedSlacker, lv99atheist
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Member
Member Since Oct 2015
Location: NY
Posts: 221
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#7
All I see in this thread is a few reasonable points as to why sometimes men do need a place to vent and doing so in a controlled environment online where they can receive helpful advice from men is a good thing. Apparently that means we're "rednecks scratching our balls". Stay classy, ladies.
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bighands, lv99atheist
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Member
Member Since Jul 2015
Location: U.S.
Posts: 267
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#8
Quote:
Not that I'd ever dream of doing that, of course. |
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Member
Member Since Jul 2015
Location: U.S.
Posts: 267
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#9
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#10
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Guest
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#11
Quote:
Please change the title of this forum to Straight Men-Focused Support. Thank you. |
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scorpiosis37
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#12
I think he meant with respect to posts about women/in light of posts about women, besides/barring (for the meantime/purpose of his point) the other topics not involving women. He was sort of singling it out.
Of course there is room too for posts about everything else regarding men, he was just focusing specifically on the posts about women for the moment. Welcome to the forum kindness, feel free to post. |
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Member
Member Since Oct 2015
Location: NY
Posts: 221
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#13
Not to dig up old drama but I'm late to the party, what's the deal with this "tires" thread that caused such an uproar?
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