[mf1438]

Well I tried. We were on a long distance trip and all alone in the car. I tried to strike up a conversation about sex and she shut me down. Now I know what I’m missing in the bedroom. A little pillow talk is a welcome prelude and postlude to sex. What’s a happily married man supposed to do? Should I look for a FWB?

[Webgoji]

Originally Posted by mf1438

Should I look for a FWB?

Unless you guys have seriously discussed an open relationship which it sounds like you haven't since there's no sex talk, the answer is absolutely NO.

Originally Posted by mf1438

Well I tried. We were on a long distance trip and all alone in the car. I tried to strike up a conversation about sex and she shut me down. Now I know what I’m missing in the bedroom. A little pillow talk is a welcome prelude and postlude to sex. What’s a happily married man supposed to do?

The first thing is to consider marriage counseling. You guys should work on your communication. Maybe even consider a little exercise using dolls (a la Marriage Bootcamp) to talk about your sex life together.

[yagr]

Originally Posted by mf1438

Well I tried. We were on a long distance trip and all alone in the car. I tried to strike up a conversation about sex and she shut me down. Now I know what I’m missing in the bedroom. A little pillow talk is a welcome prelude and postlude to sex. What’s a happily married man supposed to do? Should I look for a FWB?

She shut you down for a reason. What's that reason?

She doesn't like to talk about sex and you say that you're happily married. Weigh your current happiness without this against your happiness without her and make a decision. Because really, if you are thinking about the FWB route, you're going to be without her - it's just a matter of time, and you'll hurt someone you loved enough to marry as well.

[mf1438]

FWB, Friend With Benefits. I prefer the platonic kind (no sexual acts), but talking about sex is OK.

I've been married 23 years. I consider myself happily married. I love my wife and I don't want to leave. I just have to find a way to bring out the sex in her. And you hit the nail on the head, we don't communicate enough. I started individual counseling (she refuses to go), so this should help me to learn better coping skills!

[Maxmo]

Originally Posted by mf1438

I started individual counseling (she refuses to go), so this should help me to learn better coping skills!

As long as coping doesn't mean sweeping your own mental and physical needs under the rug...

Been married 26y myself, in a similar situation and at the end of my rope sexually. I've had a couple of flings, was found out and officially pardoned, but a FWB would be out of the question for her.

Couples therapy is probably the way to go and I think you should tell her about your feelings about what's wrong in your relationship. If she doesn't want to listen at first it'll sink in gradually, just keep bringing it up without nagging about it...that is if you indeed still want her.

[December2015]

Originally Posted by mf1438

FWB, Friend With Benefits. I prefer the platonic kind (no sexual acts), but talking about sex is OK.

I've been married 23 years. I consider myself happily married. I love my wife and I don't want to leave. I just have to find a way to bring out the sex in her. And you hit the nail on the head, we don't communicate enough. I started individual counseling (she refuses to go), so this should help me to learn better coping skills!

Good luck with that . I wanted my wife to do counseling with me and she refused also . That's her problem not yours .