[beatbox]

I've never been diagnosed. and i surely won't be going to a doctor any time soon. I'm very normal from the outside. Goes out, play sports, stuff like that. But I know I'm not normal.

Since i was little i do strange things that make me feel good, or relaxed i guess.
Walking on sidewalks, i can only take one step in every other block. I shade things in a black and white pattern in my head. If i was hit or nudged by my sister or anyone, id have to do it to myself on the opposite side so that i would feel "even". I would secretely draw very. disturbing things. I felt like if i drew them, it wouldn't happen to me. I'm very sensitive with my fingers, theres twitches and itches i have to fix when i'm touched in certain places in my fingers. I'm a mild germaphobe.

I do this thing where I get it in my head that if i don't touch or don't make a small specific move, something either good or bad will happen. It will be completely random or irrelavent. Sometimes its for the better sometimes its for the worse. For example, "if i don't go touch that wall over there and cross that chair, I won't have a good race tomorrow". Stupid things like that.
One of my biggest issues is that this "OCD" (if thats what it is) controls my eating habits. I can be completely satisfied and full after a delicious meal but if i dont get a taste of a cereal, or a pudding, or something.. It will bug me forever. So i'll over eat, surpass fullness just to calm my "needs" of a certain taste.

does this sound like OCD? I'd really like to know. I've wondered what the heck is up with me since i could remember.

[Christina86]

We're not professionals here, only other people dealing with our own problems. So we can't say for certain one way or another that you may be dealing with a certain condition. You really need to talk to a doctor or a therapist if you want an actual diagnosis. If it's bothering you, that's even more reason to see out psychological/psychiatric help.