[spincera]

I was just recently diagnosed with OCD. I also have Bipolar I and PTSD. I had thought, in the past, that my anxiety was related to generalized anxiety disorder. My pdocs never really explained anything to me about my anxiety. However, I did not realize that my thoughts (obsessions) and my mental and sometimes physical actions (compulsions) were a more serious form of OCD. I have been living in silence for years, alone with my thoughts. It was not until a psychotic episode and a trip to the hospital that I was finally given the shocking diagnosis. This happened about a week ago.
I am currently an English and Psychology student, but never related OCD to what was happening to me. I had seen OCD as a hand-washing, lock-checking, counting illness that went to the extremes. I have always counted to some degree and have needed to arrange a few things "just so" but had thought my intrusive thoughts and visions made me feel like I was just evil or crazy. I now realize that I am neither and that there is help for me. I no longer have to suffer in silence, and while I may still have these thoughts, they do not have to consume me and cause so much distress.
Currently, my pdoc cannot put me on any anti-depressants, because I go manic on them. So, she is gradually increasing my anti-psychotic in hopes that it will help. My therapist will also be working with my pdoc and myself regarding my treatment.
I just want to say, "Thank you" to all those who were brave enough to create threads to discuss your thoughts, because these thoughts clicked with me and made me realize that my doctor did diagnose me correctly. I had initially doubted her. Additionally, it is nice to know that I am not alone in this.