[windyday]

Hello all,
I believe i have suffered from OCD since 1981, waxing and waning, first hocd with many associated thoughts. Currently i have just one distressing sexual thought that i just have all the blooming time! It was first with men then started if i was near children or saw babies, and now with my 2 year old. This is the worst as you can imagine and i have been severely depressed on several occasions. I have started checking( imagining scenarios to see if i "like" the feeelingS .These usually backfire as most of the time as i neither like or dislike what i feel but of course i am disgusted and distressed that i had the thought in the first place! I feel absolutely no sexual arousal when having these thoguhts and most of the time there is no graphic imagery, just a kind of notion and an anxiety rush. The checking is the worse as i am consciously acting out my thoughts, which is very sick, even though they are just stupid thoughts. Sometimes i feel like i may like the thoughts, especially when checking, can OCD distort how you feel? I am so distressed and depressed, with thoughts of suicide. Id never do anything like that to my child. I find it difficult to ne near him, nappy change, bath him as the thoughts woosh into my mind. Where did these bloody thoughts come from, i believe ive had them off and on for over 20 years. My mom has ocd and it has ruined her life, now its ruining mine and my families. I have an appointment with mental health team but i dont think i can tell them about such thoughts, someone told me that the police were called with a similar patient! as they thought he was a risk to hi child....that is awful.

Please give me some advice , thanks!

[Nike007]

Hello. I also suffer from OCD. The intrusive thoughts are terrible for me too. I believe someone may harm me in some way.

Is there evidence that shows you would harm your child in some way? If not, they should not arrest you. Many people with OCD that have thoughts that they would never act on, but we have them anyways. I have thoughts of being shot, but i don't believe i will be shot. I suggest you tell them. They'll be able to help you. They shouldn't do anything bad to you. Not telling them would harm you even more. It's good that you are getting help for it and I wish you luck.

[Daphnelover]

I think you should make sure that whoever you are going to see is competent in dealing with OCD. The thing about OCD is that they are just thoughts. They are usually completely irrational. For instance, I read about a guy who was terrified he was going to throw his baby away. So, when mailing things, he would have to check the evelope to make sure the baby wasn't inside. I'm sure his mental health team didn't take away his baby for this. My OCD affects me in a lot of different ways. Sometimes when driving, I get the thought that what if I just keep driving strait even though there is a big curve coming up and I visualize me crashing through whatever is alongside the road. It's completely irrational but that doesn't mean it isn't scary as all get out! A good therapist will know that these thoughts are nothing more than obsessive irrational thoughts. Am I right in that you visualize or check them to be sure you won't actually follow through? I think that's your way of checking to make sure you won't actually act on the thoughts. I feel for you, that must be terrifying because they feel so real! I hope you find the help you need. Good luck

[Daphnelover]

Just want to stress that you need to see someone who specializes in OCD. I understand why you're scared to tell them. Maybe you could write to Doc John or use the ask the therapist in PC and see what they think is safe?

[Squirrel25]

Me too I have sexual thoughts about the neighbors and I worry that they are going to shoot me. Sometimes it's just my imagination but sometimes they really don't like me. Even at the doctor's office I get funny looks from other people because of inappropriate sexual thoughts.
I am taking Lexapro and a mood stabilizer. Does anyone have success with medication?