Many Forms

Hi Folks,

I've been on the forum for a while now, and I've noticed that a lot of us have symptoms that cross over from one section to another. In may case, I have bits of different diagnoses and I still get taken by surprise by my own stuff, even after years of coping with it all.

I'm beginning to wonder if the illness comes in many forms, but has a core which is common across many diagnoses. For instance, anxiety and fear seem to be common to agraphobia and to panic disorder, and also to OCD, and problems with eating. It's like the illness is expressed in different ways, but the common rail is that we are not comfortable and happy in ourselves. The Chinese have a saying, "He is not comfortable inside his own skin."

I had do to a quick double take just yesterday. I was getting irritated with a domestic appliance in the house, and I suddenly realised that the irritation I was feeling was way over the top, a sign of OCD kicking in. I quickly had to check my anger, leave the cooking for my (long suffering) wife and take time out in the bedroom, with some breathing. The key was to spot the OCD, face it, and not end up in a domestic row with my wife about something else.

So, my question is. When something blows up for us. How good are we at spotting our own situation, and addressing our own illness rather than projecting it and confusing the issue? How good are we at covering the 'many forms' that the illness can present to us?

Cheers, Myzen.

i think you make a very interesting point and i have had similar experiences especially where my ocd was involved.......to be able to recognize that its the ocd and not the situation kept me from getting out of control and perhaps wrongfully involving my family or friends in my plight ........i think we are lucky if we are able to do this ...but i think some folks "can"t see the forrest for the trees" thus exacerbating the situation........not by their fault but by the extent that their illnesses have overtaken them......interesting post.....thanks

Wow, Myzen, that's right at the heart of it for me. I've been on about this for a while now, as I have such a genetic example of cross symptom dx's in my own family. Some form of severe mental illness with middle age "onset" travels uninterrupted through my mother's side starting with her mother. No offspring from either of them avoided it, and no two carry the same dx, yet we nearly all carry similar symptoms in different heirarchy.

Also, I think the process you describe is one of expanding conciousness, pure and simple. This to me is the great gift of mental illness. I feel pretty sure that it is incumbent on all human beings to evolve conciously, and those of us with mental illness are ironically forced into it. Disillusionment is painful as a process, but would we cling instead to illusion to avoid it? lol. See what I mean?

I sure like your posts, and only wish I saw more of them. Thanks.

Hi Butterfly,

Yes, that's exactly what I was thinking about. Of course we only know it's the illness when we know it's the illness. If we don't know, then it's just so easy to blame everything and anything in our world, and why shouldn't we?

With the 'many forms' thing, I was thinking that illnesses hit into everyday lives in all sorts of ways, not just OCD. For instance, I have often heard people say, "That's the depression talking" indicating that the person talking (usually complaining) doesn't know where they are coming from. Of course this must be the stuff of counselling and therapy.

By learning to recognise our patterns, we are doing a lot of people around us a favour, but I don't know if it makes me feel any better. Sometimes I would just like to blame the whole d**** world for having such a rough deal - but it passes.

When we make great efforts to understand our illnesses, as so many people here have done, it does feel that we have gained some wisdom and some normality, but of course it is a normality with the illness in it. That's the reality.

Cheers, Myzen.

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
Wow, Myzen, that's right at the heart of it for me. I've been on about this for a while now, as I have such a genetic example of cross symptom dx's in my own family. Some form of severe mental illness with middle age "onset" travels uninterrupted through my mother's side starting with her mother. No offspring from either of them avoided it, and no two carry the same dx, yet we nearly all carry similar symptoms in different heirarchy.

Also, I think the process you describe is one of expanding conciousness, pure and simple. This to me is the great gift of mental illness. I feel pretty sure that it is incumbent on all human beings to evolve conciously, and those of us with mental illness are ironically forced into it. Disillusionment is painful as a process, but would we cling instead to illusion to avoid it? lol. See what I mean?

I sure like your posts, and only wish I saw more of them. Thanks.

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Hi Sqrlb,

I enjoy your posts as well. I'm wondering if you have studied philosophy/psychology at all? You certainly have the concepts.

Cheers,

Myzen.

What do the letters stand for? I've probably been told and have forgotten.

OCD is obsessive-compulsive disorder...