Home Menu

Menu



advertisement
Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
BlueMoon6
Magnate
 
BlueMoon6's Avatar
 
Member Since Jul 2009
Location: USA
Posts: 2,570
15
2 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Sep 13, 2009 at 02:41 PM
  #1
My washing machine broke so I had to go a laundromat with tons of laundry. I usually do a lot of laundry on a daily basis so I had to do this. It will be getting fixed on tuesday. I had 4 huge and I mean HUGE loads of laundy- clothes, towels, sheets, blankets etc....

I went back with my 10 yo son to pick up all this stuff from 2 big dryers. I was there literally under 2 minutes. As we were going to my car which was parked right out the door not more than 10 feet from the door a woman who had been in the laudromat came over to me and my son and began SCREAMING at me right in y face. "You parked in a handicapped spot and you dont have a handicap sticker- you should be ashamed of yourself what if someone handicapped wants to park there? "(the parking lot was deserted it was sunday morning- no one was there). She was saying what are you teaching your son and you go move your car right now! I was shocked and even another person in the laundromat said to her "what are you doing?" I said Im putting my laundry in the car and leaving. And you can mind your own business. With that, she ran out and wrote down my lisence number. Big deal. THEN she sees a policeman down the street and goes over to him and pulls him over to me and my car! The policeman also tells her to calm down. He said to me I have to check your license or she can comlain about me. So I said OK. The policeman was laughing but he said he had to give me a ticket. For $195.00! He said dont worry about it, plead not guilty and go to court, if I dont show up then they will throw it out. I said. "So, you arent going to show up, I say I didnt do it and they throw out the ticket?" He was very nice to me and said "Yeah" He said there was nothing he could do about it b/c the lady could cause him a problem if he didnt give me a ticket. And you know she would. She was real off.

I came home shaking. All I wanted to do was my freakin laundry!
I feel like some crazy stranger has discovered what a criminal and horrid person I am and has called the police. I deserve what I get. Tho I did park in the wrong spot- it was for under 2 minutes and the parking lot was absolutely deserted. And between my son and I it would have been difficult to take all the stuff farther to a different parking spot.

Deep breath........
BlueMoon6 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote

advertisement
Sannah
Legendary
 
Sannah's Avatar
 
Member Since Jul 2008
Posts: 19,179 (SuperPoster!)
16
1,773 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Sep 13, 2009 at 03:09 PM
  #2

__________________
Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........

I'm an ISFJ
Sannah is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
BlueMoon6
skeksi
Magnate
 
skeksi's Avatar
 
Member Since Apr 2008
Location: N/A
Posts: 2,489
16
1,145 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Sep 13, 2009 at 04:14 PM
  #3
Quote:
I feel like some crazy stranger has discovered what a criminal and horrid person I am and has called the police.
Ohh, you're not horrid or bad. I wish the police office had simply spoken to you and not written the ticket, though. That would feel a whole lot better, wouldn't it?

I think anybody who gets too much into other people's business (like where you park your car) have problems with themselves. Like the idea that we attack people about things we feel are our own problems. So maybe *she* feels she's bad and needs to follow the rules, so she notices when other people don't, too.

I'm sorry that happened to you!
skeksi is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
BlueMoon6
sunrise
Legendary
 
sunrise's Avatar
 
Member Since Jan 2007
Location: U.S.
Posts: 10,383
17
106 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Sep 13, 2009 at 05:11 PM
  #4
I'm sorry that happened to you. I think that lady could have handled it a lot better and not been rude and lost her temper. She sounds out of control. I have been sensitized to the handicapped parking issue from prior experiences, so I never park in one, even if for only a few minutes. I would rather double park.

As for the $195 ticket, it is my experience exactly like your officer said--that you have to show up in court in order for the ticket to be excused. But when you show up at court, I don't think you should lie to the judge and say you didn't do it. You did do it, and you will be under oath. Just explain the situation (Sunday morning, 2 minutes only, this rabid woman, etc.) to the judge. Be sure to act like you have learned something from the experience by saying that you will never do it again. If your police officer does not show up, then the ticket will most likely be excused. Read your citation carefully. Usually you have to send the citation back in with either payment or a box checked that says you are not paying and will be in court to contest the ticket. Be sure to send the citation back in on time, or you will owe more money.

Good luck with this, and try to put the woman's out of control tirade out of mind.

__________________
"Therapists are experts at developing therapeutic relationships."
sunrise is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
BlueMoon6, Catherine2
VickiesPath
Magnate
 
VickiesPath's Avatar
 
Member Since Jul 2009
Location: Phoenix, AZ, USA
Posts: 2,779
15
6 hugs
given
Default Sep 13, 2009 at 07:05 PM
  #5
Hi BlueMoon,

People really do get riled up about Handicapped Parking spaces. I don't really blame them but then again, sometimes they irritate me.

Five or six years ago, I had my own business. I am a certified PC technician. I have my A+ Certification. I also owned my own computer repair business. At that time, I hadn't had my one knee replaced and I had no ACL ligament in either knee. So I wore custom fitted braces on both legs. I had and still have a Handicapped Parking plackard.

One day, I drove to the computer parts warehouse and pulled into the handicapped parking area. I forgot to put my plackard up on the rearview mirror. I had magnetic signs on my minivan doors advertising my business with my business phone number on them.

When I got home, there was a very rude message on my business phone. It was from some man who had seen my van in the handicapped parking and told me one of my employees had parked there and he wanted me, the owner, to know it and he had already notified the police that there was someone who parked there illegally and he wanted me to reprimand my employee for doing that.

I called him back at the number he left. I told him that I was the one that parked there and I had merely forgot to put my plackard on my mirror. I also imformed him that I have two braces, one on each leg and I also told him that I think it would be a good idea if he found something better to do with his time than going around watching where people park and to mind his own business next time.

He didn't say much.

__________________
Horrid ExperienceVickie
VickiesPath is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
BlueMoon6
KathyM
Elder
 
Member Since Jun 2007
Location: Chicago, Illinois
Posts: 5,518
17
2,073 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Sep 13, 2009 at 07:30 PM
  #6
What is with people these days? It seems like so many feel empowered to invade the space of others and lay judgment. There were no disabled people waiting for that parking spot, and where you chose to park your car had no impact on this woman whatsoever. As a result, you now have to take time out of your day to attend court and LIE about where you parked or pay the price. Kinda silly, if you ask me.

Last spring my husband was in desperate need of a break, so we spent a couple of days fishing in Michigan. My husband is VERY close with our dog, so naturally she came along. On the first day, she stepped on a fish hook and cut her foot. It didn't occur to us the shoreline would be so littered with fish hooks. On the second day, we left her in our van and spent a couple of hours fishing before we headed home. It was a warm day, but not hot, and we placed a bowl of water with an ice block in case she got thirsty. Also, our dog absolutely LOVES the back seat of our van. When we took her camping, she refused to sleep outside - preferred the van. We we traveled to Arizona to visit our relatives, she insisted on sleeping in the van every night, lol.

I was SO AFRAID to come back to the van to find some "animal rights activist" breaking into our van to "rescue" our injured dog. I would have been FURIOUS. She was fine, btw, and her foot healed nicely.

I'm sorry to hear that woman couldn't mind her own business and was so quick to judge you.
KathyM is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
BlueMoon6, VickiesPath
Seabirdanne
Member
 
Seabirdanne's Avatar
 
Member Since Aug 2009
Posts: 263
15
Default Sep 13, 2009 at 07:56 PM
  #7
It is baffling. She simply used the issue of handicapped parking as an excuse to harass a stranger -- in front of a child, no less. Had she really cared about freeing up that space, she would have just helped you to get out of there quickly by holding doors, etc. She made it look like she had the moral high ground, but in reality, she was just an abusive person. I'm sorry it happened to you, but don't take it to heart.
Seabirdanne is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
BlueMoon6
NuckingFutz
Pet Lady of Psychcentral
 
NuckingFutz's Avatar
 
Member Since Sep 2005
Location: Las Vegas, NV
Posts: 4,564
19
71 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Sep 13, 2009 at 08:16 PM
  #8
I am so sorry you ran into an abusive person like that. But i would rather be in your position than have to actually be that bitter old woman! Again, not taking her side, these people make it hard as humans to be kind to one another. She would have expended less energy helping you than getting than yelling and get the police. Hugs for you!
NuckingFutz is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
BlueMoon6
Anonymous29412
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Sep 13, 2009 at 08:40 PM
  #9
((((((((((((((((moon)))))))))))))))))!!

Ugh, I'm sorry that happened. I had something similar happen the first time I went out with my first child - he was 6 days old, it was snowing, and someone didn't like where I parked at the post office and went out of their way to come in and find me and yell at me in front of everyone I had no idea what to do, and I still think about it from time to time.

Sunny had good advice about how to handle the ticket. Feel better

  Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
BlueMoon6
emilyjeanne
Veteran Member
 
emilyjeanne's Avatar
 
Member Since Jul 2008
Location: The big apple
Posts: 419
16
Default Sep 13, 2009 at 08:46 PM
  #10
Quote:
Originally Posted by NuckingFutz View Post
I am so sorry you ran into an abusive person like that. But i would rather be in your position than have to actually be that bitter old woman! Again, not taking her side, these people make it hard as humans to be kind to one another. She would have expended less energy helping you than getting than yelling and get the police. Hugs for you!
I understand that you are shaken up by this experience. But I have to disagree with everyone here.

I had extensive surgery on my foot in April. I was given a temporary handicap parking permit. I didn't see the importance of not parking in the handicap parking until I tried to find parking. Everytime I tried to park there were people parked in the spots who were not handicapped. Once I went to Walmart and all the spots were taken. One SUV was parked with the driver sitting in the car while they were waiting for someone. They received a ticket and continued to park there because "they had already paid for the spot." I was not able to park that day. Even though the person knew I was waiting and I was handicapped.

So now that I have had the experience from the other side. I will say something to people who are NOT handicapped but are parking for their convenience.

__________________
EJ
emilyjeanne is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
BlueMoon6, Catherine2
deliquesce
Grand Magnate
 
deliquesce's Avatar
 
Member Since Dec 2008
Location: Australia
Posts: 3,124
15
PC PoohBah!
Default Sep 13, 2009 at 09:03 PM
  #11
what a nightmare!!

i know i shouldn't but i'm a bit LOL - i'm too shocked to know what else to do, sorry. i'm amazed that someone could be like that. and actually get a cop, oh my.

i'd be seriously upset too, but at least the cop said he won't push the fine properly, so yeah.

oh my. i'm baffled.
deliquesce is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Seabirdanne
Member
 
Seabirdanne's Avatar
 
Member Since Aug 2009
Posts: 263
15
Default Sep 13, 2009 at 09:16 PM
  #12
But, Emilyjean, surely you would be polite when you said something.

I don't think anyone here condoned the use of handicapped spaces by the non-handicapped, and BlueMoon admitted she shouldn't have parked there. But she didn't leave the vehicle parked and go to a movie for two hours -- she ran into a laundromat for two minutes. No one lost a parking space; no one was waiting for a parking space.

Even if that had been the case, the woman in the laundromat had no right to be abusive. Common courtesy allows anyone to get their message across without causing someone to go home and shake and question their self-worth all day.

Who among us hasn't bent a rule? People can correct other people without being abusive.
Seabirdanne is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
BlueMoon6
Magnate
 
BlueMoon6's Avatar
 
Member Since Jul 2009
Location: USA
Posts: 2,570
15
2 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Sep 13, 2009 at 09:17 PM
  #13
Thanks everyone for your kind responses. If I had thought of it,I think a good response would have been to ask her to help me to my car if she is so concerned that someone might want to park there. It was a completely deserted strip mall with 5 stores all closed except for the laundromat. With 4 handicapped spaces! All empty! I was in only 1 of them. So, I wasnt depriving any person of their space. It is just what I should say in court. I sent in the ticket and circled not guilty. I'll take it one step at a time. I will explain what I just did here. What else can I do? Best case scenario is they throw it out- next best is the ticket is reduced. Last best is that I ever run into this crazy person in my neighborhood again.......Im hoping to catch her littering......'

Tree and Vickie- those stories are terrible. That people feel it is OK to hurt and inconvenience others b/c of what goes on in their minds. It seems to me to be the ultimate in selfish. No one is getting hurt, they have no idea what another person's reasons may be, why do they believe they have been designated public watchdogs. I went to the store later on in the day with my daughter and I felt so suspicious of strangers! As if I was going to get slammed for the slightest misstep. I guess it doesnt take much to get me on edge.
BlueMoon6 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
BlueMoon6
Magnate
 
BlueMoon6's Avatar
 
Member Since Jul 2009
Location: USA
Posts: 2,570
15
2 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Sep 13, 2009 at 09:22 PM
  #14
Thank you seabirdanne. That was what happened. There wasnt anyone at all around. Thankfully that policeman was there- I thought this woman was going to hurt me! She was followong me screaming. YIPES!
BlueMoon6 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
AAAAA
Elder
 
AAAAA's Avatar
 
Member Since Oct 2007
Location: Midwest
Posts: 5,042
17
1 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Sep 13, 2009 at 09:44 PM
  #15
There was certainly a better way of handling it. Since we don't know her life experience it's rather harsh to pass judgement. I had to chuckle about Vickie's experience with the thing that hangs from the mirror. When I was taking care of my grandmother or nephew it was a pain, it's illegal to drive with it hanging from the mirror and illegal to park without it.

But I have to agree with Emily, when you are dealing with a handicap or transporting someone with a handicap those spaces are a godsend. It's so difficult dealing with a wheelchair when there is another car parked RIGHT next to your car.

My opinion is if you did the crime, pay the fine. It doesn't matter if it's two minutes or two hours. I think we can all agree that there was a reason to make these laws and $195 really isn't bad. Here it's posted if you park without the decal it's $500. In any case I certainly wouldn't lie under oath. Odds are that the cop won't appear, but if you blatantly lie to the judge or magistrate you will not have the "mercy" of the court. A police officer wouldn't write the ticket unless you were there, he/she won't believe you anyway.

__________________
I've been married for 24 years and have four wonderful children.
AAAAA is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
VickiesPath
Magnate
 
VickiesPath's Avatar
 
Member Since Jul 2009
Location: Phoenix, AZ, USA
Posts: 2,779
15
6 hugs
given
Default Sep 14, 2009 at 07:41 AM
  #16
Quote:
Originally Posted by emilyjeanne View Post
I understand that you are shaken up by this experience. But I have to disagree with everyone here.

I had extensive surgery on my foot in April. I was given a temporary handicap parking permit. I didn't see the importance of not parking in the handicap parking until I tried to find parking. Everytime I tried to park there were people parked in the spots who were not handicapped. Once I went to Walmart and all the spots were taken. One SUV was parked with the driver sitting in the car while they were waiting for someone. They received a ticket and continued to park there because "they had already paid for the spot." I was not able to park that day. Even though the person knew I was waiting and I was handicapped.

So now that I have had the experience from the other side. I will say something to people who are NOT handicapped but are parking for their convenience.
I wasn't necessarily disagreeing that people shouldn't park in handicapped parking spaces unless they have a permit. I do have a permit. What I was illustrating was an incident whereby someone felt it his privilege to be annoying and intrusive when policing who did or didn't have permission to park in a handicapped space. As an individual who routinely parks in handicapped spaces due to physical disabilities, I often find all the spaces at places like WalMart or the grocery store are already taken and I end up taking another spot. This happens quite often in Phoenix. But I don't go down the row of handicapped parking spaces (in some parking lots, there are dozens of them) and make sure every car has permission to be there.

I am not on a personal mission to detect and destroy. I am not bothered by anyone who kindly points out any error I make which may be against the law or cause a hardship to someone. But if they get in my face and are rude about it, then look out!

__________________
Horrid ExperienceVickie
VickiesPath is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
emilyjeanne
Veteran Member
 
emilyjeanne's Avatar
 
Member Since Jul 2008
Location: The big apple
Posts: 419
16
Default Sep 14, 2009 at 09:04 AM
  #17
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vickie in Phoenix View Post
I wasn't necessarily disagreeing that people shouldn't park in handicapped parking spaces unless they have a permit. I do have a permit. What I was illustrating was an incident whereby someone felt it his privilege to be annoying and intrusive when policing who did or didn't have permission to park in a handicapped space. As an individual who routinely parks in handicapped spaces due to physical disabilities, I often find all the spaces at places like WalMart or the grocery store are already taken and I end up taking another spot. This happens quite often in Phoenix. But I don't go down the row of handicapped parking spaces (in some parking lots, there are dozens of them) and make sure every car has permission to be there.

I am not on a personal mission to detect and destroy. I am not bothered by anyone who kindly points out any error I make which may be against the law or cause a hardship to someone. But if they get in my face and are rude about it, then look out!
I wasn't making my comment towards you. I was making a comment towards people who don't have a handicap and still park in the space.

__________________
EJ
emilyjeanne is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
VickiesPath
Magnate
 
VickiesPath's Avatar
 
Member Since Jul 2009
Location: Phoenix, AZ, USA
Posts: 2,779
15
6 hugs
given
Default Sep 14, 2009 at 10:39 AM
  #18
Quote:
Originally Posted by emilyjeanne View Post
I wasn't making my comment towards you. I was making a comment towards people who don't have a handicap and still park in the space.

Point taken and I certainly understand.

__________________
Horrid ExperienceVickie
VickiesPath is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Shangrala
Poohbah
 
Shangrala's Avatar
 
Member Since Sep 2008
Location: SanFrancisco BayArea, California
Posts: 1,404
16
PC PoohBah!
Default Sep 14, 2009 at 03:09 PM
  #19
You know....
Because of the fact that the cop was under her watchful eye, and was forced to ticket you, (otherwise be reported himself), he could have very easily written you up a mere warning, instead of an actual fine, since the hag couldn't actually see exactly what was written.

Granted, he's only doing his job, especially while under that sort of pressure, but still, he could have very easily gotten around that to simplify the entire scenario for the both of you. Yet, he fines you to get his brownie pointed quota in. Blah!

Now, as a result, you must go to court on the appointed day and plea not guilty? With hopes that he is not there? Ummmm.....Don't count on it. Though, miracles do happen...lol.
If he is there, you will have to pay fine. However, you just may have luck in the matter by his absence, which will immediately dismiss it. A time well spent to visit that courthouse, I'd say.

I recently got a "speeding" ticket here in a remote hick town in Nevada. I suppose my out of state plates attracted his attention. And being from California, I'm told that these small town cops think we're all made of money.
He says he clocked me going 65 in a 35. LOL. I was slowing from 40 to 35 when he passed me. 65 was miles ago.
I made the mistake of disagreeing with him about it as I KNEW how fast I was going. Never try to tell a redneck cop his job....lmao.
Get this, he not only fines me for "excessive" speeding...lol....but for obstructing justice on top of it. OMG!
I began to argue that one, as well...but soon shut the hell up, as he forewarned me that I'm facing jail. Wow.

So, for the fine of speaking my mind was $625 bucks and the "excessive" speeding was "only" $80 bucks.

Justice?....Roflmao....Dontcha just love it?

Shangrala

__________________
Horrid Experience

IU!
Shangrala is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
jerrymichele
Poohbah
 
jerrymichele's Avatar
 
Member Since Apr 2009
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 1,177
15
PC PoohBah!
Default Sep 14, 2009 at 08:25 PM
  #20
I have had tickets before, so they give you 3 choices to plead, 1)guilty 2)not quilty, and 3) no contest. So if your anything like me, I would say not guilty. You won't be charged with lying under oath. I tend to believe that if you go in there and admit your guilt than the judged will probably make you pay without the cop there. If the cop told you to plead not quilty, then that is what I would do. Cops are really forward, and they don't tell you something that they don't mean. The worst that will happen is that you will be made to pay the fine, and if you can't pay it then, the courts will either set another court date, set up a payment arrangement scheduel or what the cop told you they will just dismiss it. Now if you are forced to pay it then pay it, because they can suspend your driving privilages over it, and that is another pain in the butt that can cost a lot of money.
Now I don't think that people should be parking in the handicap spot, but I do think that was overboard. If Bluemoon would have took the space if the parking lot was full then I could see the upset. She didn't hurt anyone. Personally I'm glad that you shared because if I ever get tempted to park where I'm not suppost to, I will remember your story. Just don't stress to much about it.

__________________
Live in the moment. Right now is the only thing we really have.

jerrymichele is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
Seabirdanne
Reply
attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 02:42 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.



 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.