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#1
Dec 21, 2009, 04:15 PM
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And no.
I cannot. Maybe in a month or so. I will miss his first real christmas. I am in extremely bad shape which is why i put this in general even though its kid related I need love. |
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#2
Dec 21, 2009, 04:34 PM
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I'm sorry to hear that, I truly am. I hope the New Year brings some better news for you both. Keep your chin up
 
__________________
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#3
Dec 21, 2009, 04:43 PM
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I'm so sorry. Could you see him on Christmas? Come over really early and stay all day?
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#4
Dec 21, 2009, 04:57 PM
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That SUCKS Bowzz
I hated those times when I was unavailable for important times in my son's life. I remember feeling resentment because my son's babysitter saw him take his first steps before I could get home from work to see it myself later that day. He knows now, (cuz I told him, lol) but he didn't know back then I wasn't there to see him take his first steps. He also knows it was because I was busy working my butt off to provide for him and keep us together. I know you need his love now, but if he's in good hands I'm sure he'll find a way to enjoy himself that day. It's a shame you're going to be left alone and childless on Christmas Day, with nothing to do and no where to go.  (Psssst, Ms. Lampshade....have you taken a look at all the "kids" around here, young and old, who could use some motherly love on Christmas Day?)  I hope you'll be able to find comfort here on Christmas Day - lots of hugs, fun and cookie crumbs. Keep your chin up - it's just a day.
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#5
Dec 21, 2009, 05:01 PM
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 (((((((((((((( Rainbowzz )))))))))))))))))
__________________
 Vickie
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#6
Dec 21, 2009, 06:47 PM
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 awww Rainbowz, I'm soooo sorry. Hugs and kisses from me.
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#7
Dec 21, 2009, 07:06 PM
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My christmas is ruined. I hate myself. Not that I didnt hate myself before. I am useless an horrible. What is the point.
^^thoughts... dont worry, i am not in danger just unbeleivably upset. |
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#8
Dec 21, 2009, 07:16 PM
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You hate yourself? Oh I know that feeling all too well. Try to think, though, if this were someone else on here, would you hate them? No, because it wouldn't be your pain, I know. I know you feel the pain so deep and nothing we can say can take it away. Just know that while you are going through your moments of self-hate, you are still loved and respected here. It's times like this, when we hate ourselves, that we need to take the hand of others and hold on. Hating yourself, as you know, will not do any bit of good. Take this hug and apply as needed.
__________________
____________________________________ "We can't talk at the same time! It doesn't work like that! I talk, you talk, I talk, you talk!!" ~ Peanut 
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#9
Dec 21, 2009, 07:24 PM
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Sending you lots of hugs Rainbowzz...hang in there
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#10
Dec 21, 2009, 07:53 PM
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(((((((((Rainbowzz))))))))))
You will get your son back I think in the years where he will remember, and he will never remember this time, too young.......
__________________
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#11
Dec 21, 2009, 08:53 PM
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((((((Rainbowzz))))))
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#12
Dec 24, 2009, 06:34 PM
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__________________
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#13
Dec 24, 2009, 07:07 PM
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((((((((((BOWZZ)))))))))
__________________
Dx: PTSD, Panic Disorder, Obsessive Personality Disorder. A Do Da Quantkeeah A-da-nv-do |
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#14
Dec 24, 2009, 10:04 PM
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HOpe you are feeling alright and that you aren't alone for the night. Big hugs to you.
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#15
Dec 25, 2009, 11:31 AM
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(((((Rainbowzz))))),
I am so sorry this has happened with the situation you are in. Unfortunately, they must have good reasons for their decision on this. It would only be a concern for Jeremy & I am sure you have the same concern yourself if you really think about it. Ok, no self hate. Take the energy you are putting into that & use it for some positive energy to get yourself out of the situation you are in so you can get Jeremy back & you both can have the life you want & need to have together. There is nothing to hate honestly. We may not like some of the choices we have made that.....but that is also a positive thing because if we didn't dislike them, we wouldn't bother changing those things either. So the thing to focus on is making a list of all the things that have to change & fix so that you can get Jer back & enjoy more Christmas's with him. Take that angry feeling you are feeling & apply it to the things that will really make a difference in your life. We are here to walk with you on this path & hopefully CPS can give you some guidance also to let you know what you need to make the necessary changes to get Jer back. Look at the blessings you do have this Christmas....you have a son who loves you......that is something that doesn't change. Take your frustrations to God in prayer. You know that God will guide you into what is best for Jer also. With his best interest on your mind may not really be what you wish it to be right now, you will understand their thinking......but don't get mad, get positive in getting those changes in place. I know that sometimes we feel trapped without a key out of the jail we feel we are in.....but I know that God has that key for you.....& will make sure you get it.....sometimes we just have to ask & we will receive. Look at the real meaning of Christmas to get your joy from the day.....because it was that child born so long ago that gives us the only hope that we really can hang onto in life. Praying that you will find blessings in the trials, Wishing you Christmas blessings, Debbie
__________________
 Leo's favorite place was in the passenger seat of my truck. We went everywhere together like this. Leo my soulmate will live in my heart FOREVER Nov 1, 2002 - Dec 16, 2018 |
 fearfulfrog, Junerain, katheryn, lynn P.
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#16
Dec 26, 2009, 12:03 PM
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 (((((((((((((((((( Rainbowzz ))))))))))))))))))
__________________
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#17
Dec 26, 2009, 12:35 PM
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Rainbowzz- I feel your pain! I was also told I couldn't see my son on Christmas. I haven't spent Christmas with him since he was 3 (he's 7 now). I was really down on Christmas morning, came here for a chat and it helped me feel better. I am doing all I can to get him back for good- I just hate the slow process!
As for beating yourself up over it- my t tells me that does no good, I have to focus on putting one foot in front of the other (Christmas special anyone??- abomnible snowman). I have to choose (sometimes minute by minute) to do what I know to be the best choice for me to get better.
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| Junerain
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#18
Dec 26, 2009, 02:15 PM
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hope that with some of the hate you have you will turn it around and use it like others have said to put right whats gone wrong i dont know the full story and i am sorry you are in this situation, just remember to lavish him love when you do see him as thats what he will remember at his young age, you can spend lots of special days with him once things are fixed and he is home with you,
(((((((((((((((rainbowzz))))))))))))))))))))
__________________
 No kind action ever stops with itself. One kind action leads to another. Good example is followed. A single act of kindness throws out roots in all directions, and the roots spring up and make new trees. The greatest work that kindness does to others is that it makes them kind themselves.
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| fearfulfrog
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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