[BamaSurvivor]

Sometime at the first of the year, I plan on moving to Florida. The thing is, I'm having to do all this on my own and I'm really stressed over it and need all the help I can get. My mom doesn't want me moving so she's said she will not help and my dad is dad and he's always said he'd never help me move. I'm moving somewhere around the Destin/Niceville/Fort Walton Beach area.

With this, I'm only getting enough money each month to barely make it by. I draw a SSI check and it's hardly anything. So every penny I save is going towards moving and it's not that much money. I also need a roomate to help pay the bills or maybe even someone I can stay with temporarily until I get on my feet. I gotta rent a moving truck to move my stuff, which costs money. I have to find a PDOC and T for my check to continue in the area which isn't that easy when I'm in Alabama. Too many things to do and it's hard to do it all by myself. Can anyone help me at all?

Links to sites that may be of some sort of help?
Anyone needing a roomate?
Anyone able to let me stay temp. until I can get on my feet?
Anyone that can help me moving my stuff?
ANYTHING?

I hate asking for help, and I rarely ever do ask for it. But this is stressing me to the max. Thanks everyone in advance.

[(JD)]

go East to Ga and make a right turn.

Bama,

I just sent you some links via PM.

Petunia

[BamaSurvivor]

Sky, I know how to get there... I've been twice since May and have found my way around there somewhat easily. Thanks, though.

I got the links Petunia, thanks.

[CedarS]

Moving can be so huge, I myself go through lots of stress and feelings of dislocation. I've gotten somewhat better at it over the years though.

I don't have any help with the specifics, I do have faith it will all work out for you. Can you keep a journal going or at least lots of lists? Jot things down when you think of them, this helps as a visual reminder of what is on your mind, you can even look at it and tell yourself that you are getting organized and clear on the steps needed for your goals. Helps me lots.

I know DVR in some cases helps folks move, are you hooked up with DVR in any way?

Another suggestion, you can find out what newpapers are in those areas and look through what you can, info probably available online. Would give you an idea on room mate possibilities etc.

You are an inspiration, you made a choice and are working on making your move real, go you!


Sarah

[BamaSurvivor]

Thanks for the insightful advice, Sarah. I plan on doing the list thing either tonight or tomorrow when I wake up. I don't even know what DVR is? lol!

I'm a member on this site that is mostly local Florida members. Very few are out of state from Florida. I'll post in the classified ads there and see if I can get any feedback.

[CedarS]

DVR = Department of Vocational Rehabilitation, they sometimes help we disabled folks out, with education and job training, with related moving costs assisted. Depends though what help you can get if any according to federal budget and all that, last I heard, not much was available. But if you are eligible, I encourage all to go for it.

I am on SSI, my only income, DVR paid for me to move from a small town with only tourist industry to a small city with a decent college. I then got financial aid for school on my own through usual route.

Another idea, remember to reward yourself however you can after each step. You are faced with a lot, a big project, you can break it down into steps, and treat yourself really good when you achieve each one.

Post in the online classified ads and you get a cookie. Along those lines, this has also helped me immensely. Otherwise I feel overwhelmed and in a panic, and all my not-fun symptoms come roaring back. With some treats, some tenderness for myself, and some occasional distractions like a good book or a nice walk, I do better.

Sarah

[BamaSurvivor]

Hmm, I'll check on that DVR thing. Never heard of it until now but seems decent. Will look into it.

Yes, will definitely need some rewards after all this crap is done and delt with. Wouldnt be so hard if I was just moving up the road, but I'm moving 6 hours away so it's kinda difficult.

[(JD)]

sorry ((((hugs)))) I'm in too much pain lately to be of any good to anyone... why are you moving? I missed that. I can always ask my T, later, if he knows anyone up that way...

[Raynaadi]

((((bama)))) Congrats on your idea for Florida! Sounds like a good move to me. And the advantage here is you have time to plan. Sounds like the suggestions here so far have been really good! And you've got a few months to get things straightened out ahead of time! Don't know how much help I'd be all the way down in Arizona, but I'll help if I can!!!

~Rayna

[BamaSurvivor]

Sky, I've planned on moving for over 2 years but couldn't start putting it to action until recently. Me and my dad have never gotten along (he calls me names and is mentally abusive) and I live in the same house/have the same bedroom I was raped in for years by my cousin and because of that, I usually stay pretty depressed in this house. I have flash backs a lot when I look at certain things in my room and that really bothers me. I also am a recovering addict and because there's still so many active addicts around here that I see and because my sister, who's in active addiction, is living with us, I want to get out of Alabama as soon as I can. It's not healthy for me to be here.

[dottie]

Hi.

I think the sooner you are out of that house.. the better for YOU!

~Dottie

[BamaSurvivor]

Yes, I think so too dottie. When I was in Florida this last time, I stayed 10 days. It was the most peaceful, best 10 days of my life. I didn't have my dad calling me names and telling me I wouldn't make it on my own. Didn't have my mom constantly under me wanting every second of my attention, didn't have to deal with my sister pushing dope in front of my face. Didn't have to deal with staying in this bedroom having nightmares or flash backs due to the abuse I took in this room. It was so amazing. Would go to the beach as the sun would start going down and would just reflect on things. It was so nice. I know this move will be tough for me to handle all by myself, but it'll be worth it to live a "normal" life for once.

[darkeyes]

((((((((((( bama ))))))))))))
Hearing this, tells me that moving is a terrific and much needed, idea. I feel being away from that element and house of horrors, you will be happier, plus new surroundings and new things to see.
Being nervous and stressed before, and during a move is very common, "making a list", which I think several people or a person suggested is an excellent idea.
When I have had to move, as well as other people, lists of things needed to be done is practically or is a must.
A few times that I moved before, finding docs. of all kinds (vets,pediatricians,pdoc, and gps) was stressful, after being an established patient with your docs. for years or less.
If you have present docs you are satisfied with, maybe they can give you referrals, they do have a personal doctor directory for all the states. If not, ask for the name of medical centers in the area you'll be living in, from there you can get referrals or even a patient doctor directory of the docs and kinds that are from that particular center.
Oh man, I know it is a job, but sounds like you need to move, and start anew.
I'm cheering you like others here.
Warm wishes for you, peace of mind,luck and love.
Take care now,
DE


((((((((((( bama ))))))))))))))))

[BamaSurvivor]

(((((((((( DE ))))))))))

Didn't know doctors could give referrals from another state, awesome! I'll get right on it and check it out. I see my pdoc next week (I think) and will check in with her about it. See my regular doc in two weeks to get my blood work results back. Will talk to him about it too.

I've already started my list, writing down everything I need to do and what I need to bring, etc, etc... It's overwhelming.

[darkeyes]

Now, don't be dissappointed if they both can't find any in their area, but they can help, I gave my former ones the county and neighboring ones that I was moving to and they found several that I had to pick from. And pdoc wise, the former pdoc and therapist did the "research" and referral for me, being that I was "new" with DX and treatment.
I just had to sign a release for my former pdoc to be allowed to talk to the pdoc in this group from our medical center, the follow up or "meet the pdoc", appt. was scheduled in advance so it worked out that actually the week after my move I started with the new pdoc.
Again, this can be quite overwhelming, it was for me when I first moved, but I got sort of use to it now that I know some of the procedures. I have faith you'll be fine, and once you move and get settled in you'll be able to say, "whew, I did it", yay! Plus be proud of yourself, okay?
Take care now,
DE

[BamaSurvivor]

Thanks darkeyes... You've been very helpful. (((((DE)))))

[BamaSurvivor]

Just an update:

I talked with my friend Michelle, who lives in Niceville Florida. One of the areas of I was thinking of moving to. She said I could stay with her until I get on my feet and start drawing my check down there. Then i'll get a place (with a roomate) that is based on income. So that part is out of the way now. Now to deal with the moving stuff, changing doctors, etc, etc.

[darkeyes]

Hi there,
If you think you'll be with her when you first go to FL, you may want to ask her where the closest medical center/hospital is, if you get the name and county, your present docs may be able to look in their directory and help point out who and where you can follow up with in your new location. Or maybe she can forward you an extra phone book? Just an idea, I'm sure you have enough keeping you busy, but maybe working on this now will help cut some stress out before you get closer to all that last minute extra stress producers. Oh well, I am glad to hear you have been given that offer from your friend, that is so special to have such a good friend. "Niceville", eh? Maybe there is more to it than just a name.
Take care,
DE

[BamaSurvivor]

Good idea, DE... I'll ask her if she can foward a phone book. If not, I'll ask her the other about the doctors and such.

When I visted Florida in May and last week, I stayed in Niceville. It's a great area. Low crime rate, beautiful beaches, not too crowded. It's really nice.

[(JD)]

We're all here for you bama... lots of good suggestions from so many members coming to you! May I be the first to welcome you (futuristically) to FL! (I'm a native, I can do this )

[BamaSurvivor]

Why thank you, Sky! (((((Sky))))) I know I'm going to love it.