[splitimage]

We were having a departmental team meeting last Fri. and one of the team building games we were playing was you'd pull questions out of a bag and get to ask them of anyone around the table. So I got asked the question, "What award would you like to win and why?" I didn't think - I just said the first thing that popped into my head and answered honestly. So I said I'd like to win the Centre for addiction and Mental Health's Courage to come back Award. On of the manager's asked what's that, and I said it's an award given out annually to people who have overcome addiction and or mental illness and have rebuilt their lives, which I've done.

Really awkward silence time. Finally one of the managers said, I've been to those awards when I worked at CAMH. That was it, end of discusssion, and very hurridly passing on to the next question.

But at the end of the day, one of the younger members of the team, came up to me and said "You know that thing you were talking about earlier, I think that's really great." So euphamisms aside I got a positive response from at least one person.

So for better or for worse, I'm now out to my entire department.

--splitimage

[Leed]

That too a LOT of courage! Good for you! I'm sure more people would have said something, but they probably just didn't know what to say. LOL I too "came out" to my employer & co-workers when I got sober -- and I got lots of kudos. But I wasn't working in a large company either.

It's difficult knowing what to do -- will they respect you or will they look at you with disgust? I struggled with that, but my gut feeling was that I had to tell them. Besides, I was in AA and I felt I needed to make some amends.

I'm sure you feel better about telling them. We're only as sick as our secrets. God bless and I still say GOOD FOR YOU! Hugs, Lee

[lavieenrose]

I also think that it took a lot of courage, and I applaud you for your honesty. It's such a culture of not looking at problems, sweeping everything under the rug and pretending everything's great. People don't know how to respond to truth. I think you "done good".

[summer_rain]

Congrats for the courage to be open and honest. Glad you got some positive feedback.

Just wondering...the lines you quote from your "favorite hymn"...what is the name of the hymn?

[wing]

What a fantastic way to call attention to the great strides you have made! Not only have you lightened your load of cares by publicly acknowledging how far you've come, you have made it possible for others in your workplace to seek you out with their questions. You may find yourself some friends that you didn't know you had.
So many families are touched by addiction and/or MI, you having the courage to speak openly can help others to share their own problems and gain hope by your victories.
I can't tell you how much respect I have for you. May you be blessed with continued good health and the freedom that comes from living without fear.

[splitimage]

summer rain. The quote in my signature is from "Lord of the Dance", but it's also sometimes known by it's original tune which is an older hymn called "Simple Gifts".

[sanityseeker]

That's awesome!! You planted a seed for others at your job who themselves may be struggling with addition. Plus you honoured yourself, your story and your overcoming.

[Beholden]

Great way to "plant the seeds" for others. And 'fertilize" your own plant!

[Can't Stop Crying]

I don't want to be the negative poster here and I applaud your courage...for all others who are considering sharing MH info., be prepared for the backlash. I shared with my supervisor very briefly about some of my struggles because I felt like it was impacting my work, next thing you know I'm in a meeting with him and HR and he is complaining that I had no right to tell him that I see a therapist (the original reason for the first conversation was because he marked me down on my review for "unprofessionalism" for a crying episode and my review was so centered around one incident that I felt it necessary to share that I was working on it and getting help).

I wish the world was more open minded, I wish there was not so much stigma attached to MH...until then I've learned that many things are better kept to myself.

[sugahorse1]

Wow - awesome... I'm proud of you - that took a LOT of courage!

[Melbadaze]

I've found my need to expose my past has gone. My reasons for doing it changed as I progressed. when I first got into AA I believed "we" were the only ones that had struggles, that the rest of the world didnt have emotional problems, disorders, I learnt that this isn't true, just not everyone goes around wearing like a badge. I left AA and entered the "real" world and understand that there are a lot of people out there struggling but dont have labels for it, they just struggle on. AA in some ways hinders progress, it keeps one feeling stuck, feeling that only those in hospital in meetings are the ill ones, lifes full of unwell people, they don't run around declaring themselves this or that.

[splitimage]

I have to agree with can't stop crying being selective is definitely the way to go. I'm still on probation at work and this week my boss expressed his concern to me that "I wasn't a good fit" for 60% of the job. Being totally honest I did screw up one report that negatively impacted on our relationship with one of the clinical departments, but it's just one report. Since "fit" is one of those wonderfully nebulous things you can't really define, I can't help but wonder if it was really my performance or my disclosure that was the issue. At any rate, I'm now feeling under massive pressure to perform above expectations just to make it through the probation period.

[IceCreamKid]

Originally Posted by Melbadaze

I've found my need to expose my past has gone. My reasons for doing it changed as I progressed. when I first got into AA I believed "we" were the only ones that had struggles, that the rest of the world didnt have emotional problems, disorders, I learnt that this isn't true, just not everyone goes around wearing like a badge. I left AA and entered the "real" world and understand that there are a lot of people out there struggling but dont have labels for it, they just struggle on. AA in some ways hinders progress, it keeps one feeling stuck, feeling that only those in hospital in meetings are the ill ones, lifes full of unwell people, they don't run around declaring themselves this or that.

I've found all the comments to this thread interesting, but I think my reply might fit best to what you wrote. I agree with you that there are plenty of unwell people and I add that plenty of them are employed. I'd like to also add that regardless of whether someone announces it or not, one's mental health and state of addiction is often obvious and on full display. I've worked with alcoholics, drug addicts, and people with profound mental illnesses. Most employers wouldn't allow someone to wave a loaded gun around at work, but have no problem looking the other way when decisions that affect others are made by impaired people. When I see some of my coworkers straggering around, obviously under the influence, the thought crosses my mind that more than likely many of them drove to work. I guess I felt the need to post the flip side to disclosure and that is: hiding impairment in plain sight, which is such a pain in the neck to have to deal with on the job. And I can't help but think that there is a connection between not being able to speak comfortably and freely about recovery and denying there is any need for anyone to seek rehab; I write this because this is what I see where I am employed.

[whoswho]

I was open about my MH to my school's nurse practitioner. Next thing I know I'm locked out of my dorm and am being escorted by security to a psychiatrist's office for no reason other than the nurses practitioner's stigma against MH.

What I learned: Discretion is key.

[lonegael]

I just had a conversation today with a possible employer whom, if I was hired by her, I would never disclose to, and I generally have a very open policy. She had a way of immediately trying to put others in the wrong from the start, although it was not what the conversation was about (she had been unable to contact my references because of my former bosses' busy schedules and sick children) and I could tell that if this was the pattern, this was not a person to trust with such information (or ammunition, as the case may be). even if you are in theory open about you illness, and I think you were probably feeling the vibes before you spoke, Splitimage, we always have to have our antenae out. It can be a dangerous world out there for us. HUGGGSSS all!

[lastyearisblank]

I would love to work in a place where this was even possible! My relationship with my coworkers is hostile and one-upmanny, even on a good day. Maybe I should think about finding a different job eh?