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  #1  
Old Aug 14, 2011, 12:25 AM
SpearOfTheLance SpearOfTheLance is offline
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I've always wondered about this so wanted to get some opinions from the user base out here.

I've sort of had a dual personality when it comes to 'work me' and 'life me'.

When I am at work, I'm very serious, no nonsense kind of guy. I hardly show any emotion and just work and do my job and go home type of guy. I do talk to people of course, but it's more all business than say I was out w/ my wife or buddies. I've heard people say I'm a boring guy at work, or too serious, or one of those old fashioned nose to the grind type of workers.

At home, I am much more looser and very easy going and as others describe 'more fun'. If I run into someone at work on the weekend, they are always surprised at my 'non work' personality and like 100 percent of the time they say 'I never knew you had this side to you' or 'How come you're not like this at work'. And I make it a note to them that I DONT talk about work outside of work.

I know where I get this from, it was the way I was raised. My dad basically told me at work it's all business and no goofing off, and once you get home, do whatever you want.

That's why my response to the 'I never knew you had this side to you' is always, well this is 'THE REAL ME', not the 'WORK ME'.

Does anyone else do this? Sort of be a different person at work vs home? Is this normal behavior?

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  #2  
Old Aug 14, 2011, 12:47 AM
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I am the same way. I like to keep my private life and my professional life separate. I have got together with coworkers a few times but not often.
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  #3  
Old Aug 14, 2011, 03:33 AM
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lol. it is a necessity often i think. The funny thing is often everybody acts all proper and cold in work.. and after work they all engage in sins and guilty pleasures... but they don't tell... as they believe others may judge them
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  #4  
Old Aug 14, 2011, 04:11 AM
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Thank you for sharing, i am also the same way. It is hard for me to joke at work. I have to always stay busy.
  #5  
Old Aug 14, 2011, 07:37 AM
TheByzantine
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Hello, SpearOfTheLance. My thought is your focus is different at work but you are always the real you.
  #6  
Old Aug 15, 2011, 12:32 AM
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This isn't excatly the same but I do the same thing. At school I am always focused, very involved (not always speaking wise but activity wise), and if I am with people I am comfortable with sometimes silly but still reserved. When I am by myself or at home I am super quiet but always moving around and doing very unproductive things. I'm not doing a good job at explaining this...but I do the same thing, and I think it is normal I see a lot of people do this, they are different depending on where they are and who they are with.
  #7  
Old Aug 15, 2011, 01:06 AM
SpearOfTheLance SpearOfTheLance is offline
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Thanks everyone for your reply.

I sort of thought it was normal, but recently the ditzy people in the office were sort of making a issue of it for some reason. I usually don't care about what others think of me, but it was getting annoying. Try hearing this the last two weeks :

'uh.......like.........uh........like you don't really decorate your office, that's like boring'.

or

'Dude..come on.... tell a joke or something, lighten up, why are you so serious'

I'll stay the way I am at work.

Also I stay out of the bs political games at work.
  #8  
Old Aug 15, 2011, 11:16 AM
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I'm fairly serious at work, but out of professional necessity rather than choice. My belief is that our lives shouldn't be so compartmentalized. I have been described as humorous at some past workplaces. I'm also serious at home out of necessity because the person I live with doesn't get my humor, and takes everything literally, so I don't bother.
  #9  
Old Aug 15, 2011, 04:54 PM
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I largely keep my work / personal life separate, out of necessity. I mean it's not like I want to share the details of my latest AA meeting or meeting with my pdoc with co-workers. That could be seriously career limiting.

But I do let my personality come out at work, when i'm working. I'm pretty friendly, and I do like to put up humorous things in my workspace. I mean I'm serious about getting my job done, and lets face it when you're an accountant you're kind of expected to be serious, but I do like to socialize a little bit with co-workers.

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Work/NonWork Personality, is this normal?
  #10  
Old Aug 16, 2011, 10:45 PM
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Wow, Spear, I don't think it's very common behavior. I do think it is what every employer is dreaming of getting when they hire someone. Sounds to me like it is working for you to compartmentalize the way you are doing. I'ld stick to it.
  #11  
Old Aug 18, 2011, 10:05 AM
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Exactly, I go to work for the money, that's it. I wouldn't be there for any other reason. Everyone here knows everyone's home business and everything and when I was out with "the smokers" they were like, "you're turn to share." I'm like, um, for one, I'm sure you don't want to hear about what goes on in my life, TWO, I'm at work, you can use anything I say against me. So, I'll bring up a topic, and let everyone else ramble on about themselves and still keep MYSELF out of it.
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  #12  
Old Aug 19, 2011, 08:41 PM
SpearOfTheLance SpearOfTheLance is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by emptybee15 View Post
Exactly, I go to work for the money, that's it. I wouldn't be there for any other reason. Everyone here knows everyone's home business and everything and when I was out with "the smokers" they were like, "you're turn to share." I'm like, um, for one, I'm sure you don't want to hear about what goes on in my life, TWO, I'm at work, you can use anything I say against me. So, I'll bring up a topic, and let everyone else ramble on about themselves and still keep MYSELF out of it.
Hahaha that's great!
  #13  
Old Aug 20, 2011, 12:35 PM
IceCreamKid IceCreamKid is offline
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The way you are acting at work is the real you, too. I would have no problem working alongside someone who is civil and all business on the job. I work with some delightful people. And I also work with some dishonest, unkind, cruel jerks who I can tell think they are totally justified in what they are doing.
  #14  
Old Aug 23, 2011, 09:42 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SpearOfTheLance View Post
I've always wondered about this so wanted to get some opinions from the user base out here.

I've sort of had a dual personality when it comes to 'work me' and 'life me'.

When I am at work, I'm very serious, no nonsense kind of guy. I hardly show any emotion and just work and do my job and go home type of guy. I do talk to people of course, but it's more all business than say I was out w/ my wife or buddies. I've heard people say I'm a boring guy at work, or too serious, or one of those old fashioned nose to the grind type of workers.

At home, I am much more looser and very easy going and as others describe 'more fun'. If I run into someone at work on the weekend, they are always surprised at my 'non work' personality and like 100 percent of the time they say 'I never knew you had this side to you' or 'How come you're not like this at work'. And I make it a note to them that I DONT talk about work outside of work.

I know where I get this from, it was the way I was raised. My dad basically told me at work it's all business and no goofing off, and once you get home, do whatever you want.

That's why my response to the 'I never knew you had this side to you' is always, well this is 'THE REAL ME', not the 'WORK ME'.

Does anyone else do this? Sort of be a different person at work vs home? Is this normal behavior?

Spear, I'm pretty much a "what you see is what you get" kind of person. I am who I am where ever I am. At the same time I have the same kind of different behavior you have between work and personal life. By virtue of what I do (work with teens at risk of becoming involved in the juvenile justice system) I keep my personal and professional lives totally seperate.

Every time I've taken one of those tests to see if a person is Type A or Type B I come out sitting right in the middle. One day I analyzed the questions. When I seperated the work vs personal life questions I am solidly Type A at work and completely Type B in my personal life. I don't see it as being two different people. I see it as letting different aspects of my personalit come out in different situations.

For me the bottom line is that if what you're doing works for you and doesn't hurt anyone else - go for it!
  #15  
Old Aug 24, 2011, 07:43 PM
SpearOfTheLance SpearOfTheLance is offline
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Thanks all again for your replies, it's really helped me feel better
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