[bill77bman]

i wish i could be normal and not worry about everything.always waiting for something bad to happen always worried i dissappoint people always feel like i am a bother feel like family would be happier and better if i wasnt around them.afraid of the outside world always stay in house cause afraid of people and people looking or talking bout me thats how i think when i leave my house

[Open Eyes]

You can work through that. Yes, it can be a challenge, but you have to learn to realize that everyone has that part of them that fears failure. You are just focusing on it more than most and have to learn that people are not constantly "judging you" but thinking about how "they themselves measure up or fit in". It is normal for people to look at other people and scan them, it doesn't mean they are even judging, they often do it with an empty mind and not truely thinking anything really other than we all tend to just look at other people as they come into our view or surroundings.

Perhaps just spend time reading the many different threads that express the anxieties of others here and you will realize that others worry too, and are concerned about "themselves" and "how they measure up and what others think of them etc". You need to know that you are not alone and that most people look to others not to judge but to gage themselves and how "they" fit in. With this in mind you need to learn to slowly step outside the boundaries "you have set in fear" slowly with a new sense that you can do so with "sympathy" for others instead of "constant fear" of others, that you are more part of than you realize.

(((Hugs))))
Open Eyes

[bill77bman]

thank you that made me feel really good i do need to slow down that is one of my problems

[bill77bman]

thank you

[Trembling Voice]

I can relate to all of this .. you almost described my life .. i hope things get better for you bill77bman .

I always think of the worst possible things myself. Stay strong - I know it's difficult to just go by that, but if you really think about it, we've all got some barriers in our lives. They may be hard to deal with, but each and every one of us is going to make it through alright. I hope that helps a little bit. I'm not the best on advice-giving, but I can relate to what you're going through.