...who decided I was a mess?... like they arrived first!

it's way too easy to misdirect...to mis-represent!

to feel better about yourself!...at the expense of myself

and just call it paranoia!

IDIOTS!

so while I hide from myself I see you hiding from me too....cos you never considered the hidden or even the need to hide!

..and now I'm suffering for all of us at my own expense...

hiding in the middle of all this crap is insane impossible

I am mentally ill!

[shezbut]

((dubblemonkey))

I am sorry. It sounds like you're battling some frustration with yourself and with others...as though you feel that other people are avoiding you. Is that an accurate summary of this post? I become pretty confused by this style of post, and I don't want to come across as a complete dummy ~ but I also don't want you to think that nobody cares about you.

I have had quite a few T's over the years, and most have said that when people make remarks about being insane that's a good sign of sanity. For instance, when I had panic disorder, I was convinced that I was insane. That thought always made my panic attacks even worse though. My T explained that my experience wasn't uncommon and that it was actually a good sign that I was sane. If I were to have these intense experiences, convinced that I was being completely sane and "with it", then my problems would be a lot more difficult to manage.

While these experiences SUCK, there is a silver lining in that cloud you find yourself living under. Very best wishes to you...