Bothered While Shopping

I know I live in a bad part of town. I do realize that. However, yesterday I went at high noon to the Dollar Store. There are always people out and about then and it should have been perfectly safe.

Instead this man who was rumpled, dirty, wild looking and had dried blood where he or someone else had scratched his face, tried to stop me. I managed to get into my car and lock the doors before he got to me, but he started pounding on the windows and shouting me, "Honey, I want to ask you something." I shouted for him to leave me alone and finally got my car started and jerked it in reverse and slammed down the gas pedal. I figured he'd move or I'd run over him. He moved.

I'm beginning to wonder if I have a neon sign over my head that I can't see that says something like, "Dangerous people apply here."

There was a time when I would have stopped and tried to talk to him, but after January, there is no way. He was at the Dollar Store so if he had needed help, he could have gone in there or any number of businesses on that street.

Jan

I know what you mean I think it's because you appear to be, and are, kind and so mean or dangerous people think they can get some of their needs met from you.... use you? abuse you? (maybe consciously or unconsciously)

Just some thoughts as I have had some experiences that remind me of that

(((((((((((((( Jan )))))))))))))))

No apologies for not engaging....... You do not have a sign on you. There are just soooo many more desperate people on the streets nowadays. One thing that might help on a couple levels: pump up your street vibes before you go out. Get your game face on, your Ninja soul on your sleeve.

I believe we telegraph vibes that are read by "interested parties". Might as well decide ahead of time the messege we want to send. See yourself as a street wise "mutha" and they will too. Actual appearances don't matter. I even went through periods of "looking for a fight" vibes, I was so angry from being scared....... anger worn like a shield. Ya know?
))))))))) )january ((((( (( ((( don't let the boogers get you down!

I am sorry this happened to you January. Pretty unnerving experience. One thing in life seems apparent though: generally people who are decent folk, kind and/or quiet seem to be the target of numerous heartaches - where some 'people' will have no qualms in using and abusing (and of course, the latter usually get away with it). Dunno why that is. Just reinforces the assumption that life is ridiculously unfair. I am loath to generalise but sadly life experiences tend to speak volumes..

I hope you are okay though? ((((January))))

i agree with hillbunny. you gotta have your street face on. and it's sad and i want to help but i can't help everyone. i became very scared one night this week when leaving a little convenience store. but i walked straight ahead, clicked door lock, light came on and there sat Fayeroe and i got in and locked doors. i think it helps me to have Fayeroe sitting there in the drivers seat looking threatening......but everyone can't have a big dog and we have to fall back on the street smarts.

i also look someone up and down so that i can identify them later if i have to. a cop told me to do that because a person is more reluctant to approach you if they think you had a good clear look at them. i don't purposefully have eye contact, just a good look at who they are.

jan, i'm sorry this happened to you. it's going to get worse before it gets better. people are hurting and they are having to become more bold. i can't drive through austin without a dozen people trying to wash my windshield or sell me water or a flower.

Jan, do you think it's possible that after what happened, you're just a bit jumpy??

I probably wouldn't have wanted to talk to him, either... but what if he wanted some help? Just something to think about...

{{{{{{{{{{{{Jan}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

PS LOL He probably wanted some money.

Sorry this happened, (((((((((((((Jan))))))))))))). I have been in similar situations. They never get any easier. I don't have any good advice that others haven't already given, but want to send hugs.

Love, Candy

(((((Jan))))) It sounds like he was creepy. I would have ignored him, also. You do get a bunch of scarey people in the bad parts of the city so no,it's not you with a sign over your head.
As far as I'm concerned, you cannot trust anybody you meet on the street and it doesn't matter if they look like he did or if they were in a nice suit, carrying a brief case. But his kind are a lot scarier looking and smelling.
You are right when you said he could have gone into one of the stores. He could have asked to use a phone to dial 911 if it were a case of needing any kind of real help.
I think you did the right thing.

(((((((((((((((((( Friends ))))))))))))))))))

Thank you each and every one for answering.

A friend of mine told me I look like "a nice person who would help anyone and that's why people keep bothering you." I've tried to learn to be street smart. I'm from the country where you automatically smile and wave at everyone who drives up or down the road. I try not to make eye contact and walk quickly.

Thank you for reminding me that attackers come in all shapes and forms; whether in shambles or a suit makes no difference.

I just don't know what else to think or say right now, but again, thank you so much.

Jan

(((Jan)))

Jan...were you at the West Side of Chas. Dollar Store by any chance? He sounds like my stalker!
Patty

Thank you, Be.

Hugs,

Jan

Oh Patty!!!!!! This is just too weird!!!!!!!!!!

There are two Dollar Stores on the west side. I was at the one closest to the Civic Center. Do you really think it was him????????????

I have chills all over me.

Jan

ladies, that would be too, too much. please tell me it wasn't him........love, pat

(((((January)))))

I'm sorry you had to experience this. It is natural to feel the way you do, and I would have felt uneasy, to say the least.

I had a similiar experience happen to me in the grocery store over the weekend, which continued into the parking lot. It made me very upset and a little afraid to even go back to this store, and this was in a nice neighborhood!

I can't give a reason as to why this could have happened to you, perhaps people just find you very approachable. That can be good in some instances, but it can be bad too.

Wishing you well,
Sujin

((((((((((((Jan))))))))))))))) Sometimes it seems that people just zero in on you if you just try and be civil. I am glad that you locked your doors and got away as it sounds like his intentions may have not been good. There were plenty of places for him to get help if he needed it. I always think they are going to ask for money and hesitate showing that I even have any with me.

Jan...it probably wasn't him, but my relatives told me that he had approached them panhandling down on Quarrier St. and they recognized him.
I guess, on the West Side, there are all sorts of characters who approach people, unfortunately. I've been to the Dollar Store there right on Wash. St., if that is the one you are referring to, and always felt a bit uncomfortable because of the proximity of the many bars, knowing the way desolute characters frequent the area.
In PM, I can tell you a description of my stalker
Patty