[LeeLaLe]

Hello,

I know this was posted before, but I have an additional question. I often feel like a failure. (I would use the word "constant," but I now at least lessened it.) I know cognitively that I am not. I know that I have worked hard, done achievements, and grown over my life so far. I also know that all this cognitive knowledge disappears in the mornings, afternoons, and/or evenings- sometimes for a day, sometimes for a week, and if I am not careful, sometimes for up to a month.

I have been told before to lower the "bar" I have set for myself. Yet, each time, the other part of me taunts "cope-out" and "weakling." (I do not see myself as weak.) I can get it half-way down, and then it is back up within a few days. I know I hold unrealistic standards often. Yet, escaping them is the problem, which helps fuel the "failure" mentality.

Ironically, I am already highly spiritual, so philosophies similar to those found in "The Secret" I believed in before it was printed. I, at times, can use this aspect to help, and at times, it is no help.

Any help would be appreciated.

I have a virtual audiotape in my head, and the tape has some negative comments on it. Whenever the tape says "you will never amount to anything" sometimes I believe it. That leads to me erasing positive comments with negative comments.

The good news for me is that the audiotape can be re-recorded. I try to rewind the tape to the beginning and start over, and if I like what the tape says, I let it be. When the tape says something negative, I press stop. I reality check what it says, rewind it a little, and tape over it with a positive comment. Then I press play.

My audiotape is not playing Kum-Buy-Ya (I don't know how to spell that), but it's playing a pretty nice song. I'm a work-in-progress. And I'm OK with that.

[mountain human]

Originally Posted by LeeLaLe

Hello,

I know this was posted before, but I have an additional question. I often feel like a failure. (I would use the word "constant," but I now at least lessened it.) I know cognitively that I am not. I know that I have worked hard, done achievements, and grown over my life so far. I also know that all this cognitive knowledge disappears in the mornings, afternoons, and/or evenings- sometimes for a day, sometimes for a week, and if I am not careful, sometimes for up to a month.

I have been told before to lower the "bar" I have set for myself. Yet, each time, the other part of me taunts "cope-out" and "weakling." (I do not see myself as weak.) I can get it half-way down, and then it is back up within a few days. I know I hold unrealistic standards often. Yet, escaping them is the problem, which helps fuel the "failure" mentality.

Ironically, I am already highly spiritual, so philosophies similar to those found in "The Secret" I believed in before it was printed. I, at times, can use this aspect to help, and at times, it is no help.

Any help would be appreciated.

Have you ever tried Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) or Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), you sound like an excellent candidate. Tons of books on the subjects.

[Fuzzybear]