[ozzie]

I have found in the past year that being around certain people will cause me to have some depression after the encounter. Two of these people are sisters of mine.

Sunday my husband and I attended a birthday party for my great neice who turned one year old. One of these two problem sisters of mine is the toddlers grandmother and was helping to host the party. This sister is very cool towards me and for the rest of the day and evening I was depressed. I'm still depressed today! It won't last much longer but it sure has slowed me down today.

Does anyone else have "problem" people in there lives? People who stir up feelings that you thought you had dealt with sufficiently but apparently haven't? It was nearly six years ago when my sister and I had our initial "falling out". Surely that's enough time to recover from the hurt and anger.

I'll discuss my other problem sister later.

[Fuzzybear]

Yes I do too, and some of them are family members, I've felt suicidal after visiting some of them, when I wasn't before

It depends how deep the hurt and anger is, I'm sorry you're struggling ..... grrrrrrrrr at them

((((((((((((((( Susan )))))))))))))))

[(JD)]

Family dynamics are always in play, even when you're not around Clear it out asap...(((hugs))) Part of the sadness I think involves wishing it were different? Fill those "sister" roles with ppl who aren't beset with your family dynamics

I'm sorry you have this reaction, but good for you in recognizing what they cuase you to feel! TC

[Perna]

I don't think one "gets over" sisters, especially if they're still around. It is kind of like a divorce. Did you read this article on happiness http://psychcentral.com/news/2007/03...-on-happiness/ it says that not all events are created equal, some one doesn't "get over."

I'm glad your feelings don't last a day; that reminds me of some of my old dreams where I'd wake and be depressed because of them? I think it's probably inevitable when you're with these sisters that you're going to be "reminded" of whatever it is that upset you in the first place? Even just being around the niece and great niece without the grandmother would probably remind you of your sister? I don't think there's anything wrong with feeling sad things aren't or weren't different? I would actually feel badly if you didn't "care." It's hurts. It could get better with time but I don't think it has to necessarily; there's still hope.

for me susan...just the thought of some people depresses me.....mainly my 2 half sisters who i have not talked to in years......i think we also hope for that wonderful sister to sister relationship.......

[50guy]

I moved 1160 miles away from my family in Philadelphia.
I talk to my Mother on a regular basis and sometimes my youngest brother. Other than that, I haven't had a real relationship with my other 3 siblings. I really left home at 17 when i joined the Marines and never looked back.

Oh dear-- you have problem sisters too??!!

BTW-- HI Ozzie!! Good to see you around!

I have a half sister and a sister that I feel similar to what you described when I'm around them. It's like I'm 8 years old again and defective. ... it hurts so much.

Ozzie sorry you are having a difficult time--

mandy

[Maven]

Oh, yeah, I think almost everyone has people they prefer to avoid, because they'll be in a depressed, angry, sour or otherwise bad mood afterwards. There are people who leave me feeling exhausted and drained. Some people blow my mind with the things they say. I haven't even met him (and don't want to), but my boyfriend has told me about a racist co-worker who has outrageous theories that amaze the both of us. You have to wonder how some people come up with the things they do. He also has another co-worker who helped us move from our last apartment, and he pissed me off when my boyfriend told me something he'd said that I hadn't heard. I was sitting on the steps outside our apartment, and he said, "Why don't you get off your fat *** and help?" to himself. I happened to look his way, apparently, and he thought I'd heard, but I hadn't. He told my boyfriend what had happened, then my boyfriend told me. I couldn't lift the furniture, and my OCD is a major issue, but I'd done a hell of a lot of things that were hard as hell for me because of my OCD in terms of cleaning and carrying what I could, so I don't appreciate his comment. My boyfriend is still friends with him, and he tells me stuff about him, but I want to yell, "I don't care!" He recently told me the guy was giving him his opinions as to what we should look for in a house (as my bf said previously, why is he so invested in and excited about our house search?), and I wanted to scream, "I don't [BLEEP!]ing give a [BLEEP!] what [the guy's name] thinks!" but I just held my tongue.

[Crystal88]

My brother. he is always looking at the down side of life and that brings me even farther down if I am having a bad day.

Hi Ozzie,
I go through the same exact thing with my family. I would be fine and happy, living my life until we'd cross paths and then I'd get all depressed and sad. I've intentionally stopped seeing them altogether and I do feel much better but now I don't see my "family" anymore and sometimes I do miss being able to see them. But what good is a family if they only make me feel terrible about myself?
I cannot change how they are-although I can change how I react to them BUT I cannot change how they make me feel and how it stay with me for days after the fact.
(((((((((Ozzie))))))))))))

[ozzie]

Thank you everyone for your replies. I have been gone from the site for several weeks and have just gotten the chance to read all of them.

I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels these things around their relatives.