[clandestinelament]

First of all, I wasn't really sure in which section to leave this thread, but thought since it's still like 'new member curiosities' about this forum and not directly related to any of the other mental health conditions, maybe post it here.

I am still not really sure how to go about writing about my issues. It's going to be weird and some getting used to, seeing my thoughts typed out on a screen. I am still really self-concious of all that I type (I am not great with computers), probably because of the fact that it's vulnerable and out there for everyone to see (even though I realize everyone starts of being anonymous and most remain to be that) and potentially to be criticized (which are my habitual thoughts as I realize that criticism is not something which is encouraged on this forum) which frightens me a lot. It likely requires me some getting used to and to develop some trust which comes with positive experiences, I reckon.

I wonder, this is going to be my question, as I am trying to see myself as well, how using typing on a forum/the internet for sharing and talking about much personal stuff, that you would or might normally not share with so many or anyone at all in life, is different from the real, non-anonymous life? Again, I am really sorry if this is a very obvious matter to everyone, but my understanding of computers (and many other modern technologies...) is very limited, which is the current reality.

[-jimi-]

For me, sharing is easy because I don't know you guys. If I start to know you, you cannot judge me for being mentally weird, because we met on PC... Some people are as shy sharing online as they are offline. It depends. I'm not particularly shy sharing offline either, if it is a person I don't meet much..... I noticed the more important someone becomes, like my BFF, the less I share....

The other part is possible hurt. To me words hurt the same said and through the screen. So for me in that case, there is no difference.

Hi Cland, sharing here is anonymous if you wish it to be you can say you're 44 year old man living in your moms basement when in reality you could be a 21 year old college girl. The possibilities are endless for not "putting yourself out there" but I like to be open and don't want to hide behind guises. In short, this is a safe zone. Hope this helped

[marmaduke]

When I first started use the forum I was terrified of criticism, vunerable and semi scared to read any replies, yet disapionted if I didnt get any.
Most posters are nice, helpful and supportive.
Be brave!

[jaynedough]

Hi Clandestinelament. It can be daunting, opening up here. I rarely posted anything the first 4-1/2 years. The past few months I've opened up a little. Its scary for me b/c I don't like to tell others how bad I'm doing. Usually, I only tell my T. I tend to drop bits and pieces in different forums, that way it feels like maybe I won't overwhelm people with my issues. One thing that's really helped is the realization that people here all have issues, too. (I say this is my tribe.) I have schizoaffective d/o and sometimes say things that people may find strange. Once I realized that this is my tribe, I realized that this is the perfect place to say things without fear of being judged. I don't really socialize in real life (IRL). I've made friends here. You can share as much or as little as you want. Once I found the Games Forum, I really started posting. I play a lot of games and that helps me survive the bad times. Maybe if you start out with something like that, you can build your comfort level. Also, reading what others have written can help, too. At any rate, welcome to PC!

[kim_johnson]

I find writing helps a lot. The process of writing. Then reading what I'd said... Thinking 'that isn't quite it' or 'that part isn't so clear' etc. It encourages me to think more deeply about things as I go through the process of articulating it and revising it. I find the activity of writing to be a useful process of working through. I find that... A very powerful form of therapy, indeed. It helps me see what is going on for me a little more objectively, so I am in a better position to advise myself.

Sharing it also helps. It really helped me through a point in my life where I was full of shame and self loathing. I wasn't able to be as kind to myself as other people were and the feedback that I got from them (mostly positive, but the odd negative thing showed me that I was actually a whole heap stronger than I thought)... Helped me get better at accepting myself. Helped me feel less alone to learn that other people had struggled through similar things.

It is very hard to find therapists IRL who are capable of... shutting their pie-hole. They all seem to think they need to offer concrete suggestions from simplistic lists (no! I never would have thought of that!)... Interrupting me in order to share their thoughts... For their own egos...

WELCOME clandestinelament !!!! I loved the way Jimi put it...."For me, sharing is easy because I don't know you guys." No one knows me here. I can be me.

When I need to write, I write. If I am looking for suggestions, ideas, or support that writing may end up here in the form of a post. Since I've been coming here, my Therapist has noticed that I am more open with her and my family. Sometimes I copy what I write here and share it with her or my husband. I do find that helpful at times.

As far as knowing about technology type stuff, I know very little and do okay here. There are always people willing to help if I have a question.

again, welcome and stick around, you are not alone

[magical loser]

there are things i cant talk to people irl about because

- i dont want them to know, it would make them change there opinon of me, or at least make it worse, because nobody really likes me anyway

- nobody understand. people who dont have mental issues dont understand them so you end up getting the "snap out of it" crap which is really unhelpful. other people on here are in the same boat so should understand more, esp if they have the same problems

[OneLove92]

I have that same issue. I am having a hard time opening up here and allowing myself to be vulnerable and open to judgement. But I also know that everyone on here is here for a reason ad we all have our own deep dark secrets and demons that are on our inside and for us all to get better we all need somewhere and someone safe to talk to no matter how crazy or dark it is.

[clandestinelament]

These are all really great comments. Sorry, don't really know how else to reply. For the first time in my life I feel I get a chance to talk. What's been said probably weighs much more highly than what I could reply to it...

[avlady]

i think people who post replies and other posts are mostly all in the same boat, we worry about critisism. most posts and replies are God sends. i've learned that replying to others posts is also fun and educating. i learn something new every day. i would like to think everyone likes me here, and i can help them too. i am not great at computers either but its enough to get by here.

Originally Posted by clandestinelament

These are all really great comments. Sorry, don't really know how else to reply. For the first time in my life I feel I get a chance to talk. What's been said probably weighs much more highly than what I could reply to it...

It is great to see that you are still here. This site can be fun too. http://forums.psychcentral.com/gener...-your-own.html sometimes I come here just to vent/talk. I've noticed I am not alone in that. It helps me feel better sometimes.

i hope that you can share

i agree with 1 of the statements made... people don't know each other, so not only do you have their support, but if you saw them on another forum (under a diffrent username or something), they arn't going to say- oh look, their's such and such with such and such a problem, as they simply don't know who you are

also all of us here have some issue or another. so to judge would be wrong, and if anyone did it they either don't fit in here, or they are self centred (which can happen too)