[MyIntenseSecret]

My question/situation is this: I have created a fake reality in my head. I am a different person, and there are people who I've never met, just made up. Like in my head entirely, I'll pretend I have a boyfriend, or someone's interested in me, or that everyone finds me interesting. Sometimes, when I situation in real life doesn't go the way I want it to go with people, I re-create the situation in my head, completely. I do it mostly to make people jealous. Like when I worked at the mall, there was this cheerleader I worked with. I'm sort of awkward, though I have friends and all, so I completely imagined that for some reason the whole store had to watch a cheer routine with me in it. These realities aren't just split second things, I do it everyday, all day. It's like I'm constantly daydreaming of what i am or would like to be. I talk to myself all day, as myself, and the voices of others. I can't really put it into words. I can be in a room alone, completely silent all day and just have these fantasies. But i'm aware that I'm doing them, and I'm aware that it's not normal. But I just..always do it. Everyday. My obsession changes ever couple of weeks or so when I get bored. Now, my fake reality is that I'm on a student news thing at my school. I detail everything, and everyone. I work with like 5 other people and they all have different personalities. I don't know whats wrong with me, but I know this isn't normal. I talk to myself in my head all day, whats wrong with me? Do I have a problem even though i recognize that this isn't normal? Thanks.

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by MyIntenseSecret

My question/situation is this: I have created a fake reality in my head. I am a different person, and there are people who I've never met, just made up. Like in my head entirely, I'll pretend I have a boyfriend, or someone's interested in me, or that everyone finds me interesting. Sometimes, when I situation in real life doesn't go the way I want it to go with people, I re-create the situation in my head, completely. I do it mostly to make people jealous. Like when I worked at the mall, there was this cheerleader I worked with. I'm sort of awkward, though I have friends and all, so I completely imagined that for some reason the whole store had to watch a cheer routine with me in it. These realities aren't just split second things, I do it everyday, all day. It's like I'm constantly daydreaming of what i am or would like to be. I talk to myself all day, as myself, and the voices of others. I can't really put it into words. I can be in a room alone, completely silent all day and just have these fantasies. But i'm aware that I'm doing them, and I'm aware that it's not normal. But I just..always do it. Everyday. My obsession changes ever couple of weeks or so when I get bored. Now, my fake reality is that I'm on a student news thing at my school. I detail everything, and everyone. I work with like 5 other people and they all have different personalities. I don't know whats wrong with me, but I know this isn't normal. I talk to myself in my head all day, whats wrong with me? Do I have a problem even though i recognize that this isn't normal? Thanks.

Im sorry we cant tell you if this is normal or not.. we cant make diagnosis of other members lives and problems here.

what I can tell you is that for some people it is a normal thing for them to do this and for others it isnt. sometimes its called all kinds of mental disorders sometimes it isnt..

the only way to find out if this is not normal for you or is a problem for you is by you contacting a treatment provider your medical doctor, your therapist, your psychaitrist or locating one of them and going to see them, near you.

[advena]

I just want to let you know I understand because I do the same thing. I have detailed fantasies I have thought about for years. I think the fantasies provide something I am not getting from 'real' life and I think that's where it can become a problem. Instead of accepting who I am and making real connections I live in my head.

[Switch]

I do the same thing. It's part of why I watch so much TV: I put myself in those situations, and then "make believe" them with myself, and it's essentially creating a second, fake, reality where nothing's the same. I do get where you're coming from.

I use it as an escape too, but I also try and keep a firm grasp on reality (even though I don't like it). I also find that it's not a bad thing because I know it's not real (again, I know what's reality) and I try not to isolate myself. That's the hardest part for me is finding time to walk away from those daydreams (they feel like more than daydreams) and making myself do things for real. I tend to isolate myself, but if you can make yourself say yes to going out with friends, that's a good thing. If you find yourself choosing to stay inside instead of going out with friends because you want to keep dreaming then that's when it becomes an issue (in my opinion) and you need to make a serious effort to combat that.

Now if only I could take my own advice... ((((MIS)))) Good luck.

[Xambgii]

I do this all the time.
I try to keep it from reality, but sometimes it doesn't work. And I isolate myself, picturing scenario after scenario. It actually sometimes gives me comfort....

[Perna]

You may not have a problem now but I believe you are making it worse for yourself later. I was exactly like that; went to a boarding school in England (which was in an old monastery), had a boyfriend (red-haired, blue eyed) named Michael, a horse named Thomas Aquinas who was so smart he could come when I called ("Toe-Mas!") and a girlfriend, Kathy, who was my side-kick. Everyone loved me and I was head student of the school, known for my wisdom. Meanwhile, I was actually in public high school in Maryland, getting C's and D's, had only two part-time friends and no social life; was lonelier than a penguin in the Arctic (penguins are in Antartica/the Southern Hemisphere only) and "shy" doesn't begin to cover my underwhelming social attributes.

When I was 20, I realized that I was going to be graduating from college in a year and probably needed to learn a few real-world skills so I could get a job and wander off into my "real" life? Had a "breakdown" instead; when I tried to "kill off" my fantasy friends and life, it was too upsetting! I knew that crying inconsolably about the death of imaginary people was probably not healthy (never mind getting rid of them by killing them? :-) and, thus, not being able to get rid of them. . . I started therapy.

I don't fantasize that way anymore (I'm only 61 now :-) and stopped, because of therapy (I believe) when I was only about 52-53. You might want to work on your anxiety about the "real" world and how you fit into it? You might want to get out in the "real" world and interact with real people instead of those in your head. Yes, it is very hard, scary, confusing. You are building a habit of interacting with imaginary people in your head and getting use to it instead of learning how to interact with the people around you (which, you have to learn eventually as you don't literally live in your fantasy world?) and getting experience with that. The longer you fantasize, the hard it is to get rid of the fantasizing and the further "behind" you are learning about "real" people and experiencing real life situations.

Do you know about the "animal" children; children "raised" by animals? Humans can only learn to speak for a certain window of time as infants/children and when that goes away, they can't learn to anymore: http://faculty.washington.edu/chudler/moviesfc.html

Not to scare you, but accenting your imagination makes learning to live in reality that much harder; it's like if you break an arm or leg, that arm/leg in a cast gets all white, thin, loses muscle while the one you are still using is tan, full, well-muscled/strong.

If you can't talk to your parents, maybe you have an aunt, teacher, someone else you trust who might have ideas how to help you? Personally, I think if I were you I'd make friends with a librarian and see if she could help me come up with a plan using bibliotherapy. I once wrote a story where the character would "invent" a day and then go out and live it (i.e., they'd go to a park and have to talk to 3 people or they'd ask their mother to do a chore with them (cooking, cleaning) and talk about their mother's life and problems when they were their own age, etc.). Make a list of real challenges for yourself that have you interacting with real people (force yourself to go talk to that cheer leader or to ask someone for help with a homework assignment or to study together for a test, etc.).

[roads]

Originally Posted by Perna

If you can't talk to your parents, maybe you have an aunt, teacher, someone else you trust who might have ideas how to help you? Personally, I think if I were you I'd make friends with a librarian and see if she could help me come up with a plan using bibliotherapy. I once wrote a story where the character would "invent" a day and then go out and live it (i.e., they'd go to a park and have to talk to 3 people or they'd ask their mother to do a chore with them (cooking, cleaning) and talk about their mother's life and problems when they were their own age, etc.). Make a list of real challenges for yourself that have you interacting with real people (force yourself to go talk to that cheer leader or to ask someone for help with a homework assignment or to study together for a test, etc.).

This sounds like a wonderful plan of attack! How creative of you to come up with it, Perna. Thanks.

What do you think, MyIntenseSecret? Worth a try?

[girlinafakeworld]

I completely understand what is happening. Because I also created a copletely diferent world in my head. And I guess it's kind of an escape for me, but then at the sam time I know that it's not just that because I use it when something good happens aswell.