[DocJohn]

I just need to clarify a policy issue as some members seem to be suggesting to teens that they shouldn't be in a general chat room.

ALL chat rooms, except the teen room, are open to all people of all ages, no matter what. It is NEVER appropriate to ask teens to go to the teen room.

The teen room's use is optional, encouraged, but not mandatory for teens. It was created because a lot of times teens have a different take on things where they find it easier to hang out with folks from their own age group.

If you're in a serious chat about an emotional or abuse issue or something of that nature, you should be in the "Support Room." Everyone should respect that room as a place for serious conversations only. If someone is acting inappropriately with others in the room when such a conversation is occurring, they need to report the member to a moderator or administrator and they will be warned.

Remember, too, that you can create a private room at any time for any topic you'd like and invite others into your private room. Your room can also be password protected to limit access if you feel like it.

Chat is one of the benefits of our community, and one I would like to see continued in a supportive, friendly environment. I understand chat often is seen as more social and light-hearted than some of the conversations that go on in the forums, but many, many fellow members use it for serious discussions as well. Please respect such discussions when they take place.

Thank you,
DocJohn

[(JD)]

Thanks DocJohn. I do hope that this will help everyone remember to respect the ongoing conversations! And, I hope it helps those who think it rude to make a private chat room, realize it's just being "good neighbors."

[DocJohn]

Yes, if you "walk" into a chat room and an existing conversation is taking place, you're welcomed to say "Hi" to your friends and such, but please respect the conversation taking place. It's the same common courtesy you'd have if you did so in real life and joined a group of people chatting at work, at a party or in a support group.

Sometimes such conversations may be really important to the members involved. Listen in for a few minutes, and then decide whether the conversation is one you're interested in or not; move on to another room if it's not.

Thanks for your support,
DocJohn

[(JD)]

OT WOW a new pic!

[GYPSYEYES]

Why is there a teen room, if its just an option, you tell us adults to make a private room, if we chose to, why not just get rid of the teen room, and they can make a private room as well. maybe what im trying to say, what is good for adults, should be good for the teens as well. maybe i feel why arent we worth to have 18 + room, like they have teens room.

just curious, hopefully you can enlighten me

[heyjoe]

Doc John, for just the reason you stated for teens that they have a different take on things and that its easier for them sometimes to hang out with other teens, is the reason there should be an over 18 room. People over 18 also have a different take on things obviously and also can only talk about some things amongst themselves. Many people, including myself for a long time, do not know how to find a private room and do not realize that people are talking in one with the present set up. I am curious why the resistance to an over 18 room when it would serve the members needs more adequately.

[selfy]

hmm i think i agree, that way some who are less able to find a private room or create one will find it easier. and i promise i will keep my nosey out

even though i have a tendancy to but it in where it is not needed.
anyway i think it is a good idea. though i dont know really wether it is a good idea to seperate ages at all... idk
hmm
i have seen adults in teen chat and do not have a problem to them being there, i dont want to be seperated from people i am friends with because i am not over 18, and i dont want people thinking i am unable to cope with certain things or give advice. hmm i think that if the conversation was getting to something that the others didnt want a child to hear i would remove myself from the conversation. anyway... i think i went on a ramble...
actually i think i am gonna change my opinion.coz if ppl move to over 18 chat without explanation i would feel as if i have done something wrong. yes this also would apply to teen chat i think, but i am not sure
tc all
self

[drummergrl]

Thank you Doc John! I will certainly respect the rights of others, and steer the teens to their room. They do see things in a different light, and they probably will get more understanding and compassion from their own kind and age group. However: what if they are looking for an opinion different from their parents and just want an older persons advice?
We don't want to make them feel unwanted or unwelcomed now do we?

Doc, one of the problems (questions) I have is, <u>how do I know</u> if I'm talking to a teen?
I agree it's a little condescending to ask "how old are you?", so that's not an answer.
But, really, I would have one type of conversation with someone my age that I wouldn't dream of having with a teen. I don't think it's possible to censor one's own conversation continuously as if teens are present.
Let's face it, an adult has a way of talking that is quite different from a 13 or 14 yr old in many areas.
It's a bit conflicting not knowing who is who, age wise.

[okiedokie]

I don't know that there is a way to police or enforce an age limit in either regard.

I've actually had more difficulty with finding folks giving/receiving serious support in the social room.

Thanks,
Okie

[tranquility]

Yes - Sky when I saw Doc John's photo I thought it was an imposter Doc - you playing tricks on us?

[Soidhonia]

Hello everyone and Doc John. I sincerely feel and AGREE with Doc John. If the chat room is being used in an inappropriate purpose for conversations that are not appropriate for others, then somone should go to a private room for their own conversation since Sex and other topics are Triggers for most people with more severe mental health issues. I feel that this is just respect for others feeling and emotional well being. For the most part I feel that the SUPPORT ROOM is not being used when needed or deemed appropriate, and others in chat feel triggered and left out when the person needing support chooses to stay in Social Chat or the MAIN ROOM while actually needing to be in the SUPPORT ROOM having a converstaion with a concerned party who can give rational and guarded Support. Perhaps the issue is not having people choose the particular room in which to chat but is chat being used in the manner for the most safety for others in chat. I frankly like chat because there are many people that others like myself have helped others into the SUPPORT ROOM when deemed necessary to spare everyone elses safety from the issues someone may be having that the person did not feel necessary to share with others in the chat room. There are many responsible people in chat, but perhaps things are going overlooked when someone is in need and the people in need of the SUPPORT ROOM are just choosing to stay in the wrong Room, or feel that there will be no Support in the SUPPORT ROOM since everyone is in theie Private room, MAIN ROOM, or SOCIAL ROOM they have no choice but to be in the rooms other people are in ( I am mainly Speaking of the new People).since the OLDIES but GOODIES know to send people in need of immediate support to the Support Room and go with them when needed. I really feel that everyone can get along if they just have respect and move to another room if the conversation is not aggreable for all people especially if SEXUAL ISSUES or other issues are involved that may harm another person. This is a MENTAL HEALTH chat room and we must care about others welfare as well as our own since people are very sensitive concerning CERTAIN issues. Whatever they may be, if you feel the conversation can not be heard by everyone then obviously as ADULTS it is time to make the right decision and start a PRIVATE room for everyones protection especially the minors or more sensitive individuals in chat. Take care and good day to everyone. I hope to see you all in CHAT soon when MY LIFE calms down a bit to talk to you all again soon. Until then take care and good day. Soidhonia

[ally88]

thanks, Doc John, as i have had this happen to me before.

I totally respect any person who has a problem and requires support talk to help get through it. I have needed it myself. However...support needed is sometimes laughter. Have we forgotten that famous line "Laughter is the best medicine"? If tehre is something serious and we all need a moment to talk about it, many times, some people try to use a bit of humour to pick up a person's morale. They are not laughing or lessening the other person's problem. I doubt that anybody in the chat rooms are disrespectful. I have never witnessed disrespect. We must remember as a person in need, we do not get the advantage of viewing a respondent's facial expression when they make a statement or ask a question. It is easy to misinterpret a statement.

Life is serious enough and humour is not meant to demean or disrespect another person's problem. So please stop condemning a bit of humour and lighthearted chat in the support room. Sometimes, smiles and laughter do not solve the problem, but they can help to make the road to recovery alot more pleasant.

Private chats are an option. If people expect to be left alone to converse about a private matter....do they sit in an open area that invites others into the chat and then ask then to stay out of the conversation? If an problem is existing and I log into an open chat room, I log into it to get perspectives and viewpoints and objectives. If I want a private chat, I will go to a private room. If the person wants a private chat but does not know the process, I know that everybody who chats online will be happy to help that person find a private area. So please stop condemning these good people in chat. They have a good heart and sometimes it needs to be light and cheerful.

If there are many people in the room at the time one enters it for a serious topic, expect various participants with varying degrees of understanding and personalities. That is how we grow in life.