[cclm]

Hey guys, I’m new here; literally just signed up- I didn’t know where else to go and I was hoping one of you could help me. I’m thinking maybe I have some sort of anxiety disorder but I’m really not sure, could you help me identify what you think this is, if anything at all? Some info:
-I am a CHRONIC procrastinator. I’ve struggled with this for like 3 years now, tried a bunch of strategies, but it’s only getting worse.
-I’m definitely a perfectionist. I’m very hard on myself.
-I’ve cut; a couple of times.
-Last year I thought I had an eating disorder; I would obsessively count calories then skip breakfast, have maybe a tiny lunch, and dinner, and I would run 3 times a week and exercise late at night. I would also look up pro-ana tips and follow some of them.
-I’ve had 2 complete breakdowns in the last year where I’m just sobbing, tearing at my hair, wishing I wasn’t here- not dead, but… not here.
- The only thing relatively panic attack-ish I’ve experienced is when I get extremely stressed and that combines with misophonia, my throat tightens and my heart starts to beat faster and my muscles tense up. It doesn’t happen very often.
-I get extremely stressed about grades; I’m an honors student singlehandedly running 2 clubs and I’m a member of 2 others; I have 3 different jobs this summer. I put a lot of pressure on myself, yet I still worry about whether I’m good enough.
-I tend to try to distract myself with technology when I’m stressed.
-There was a short period where I didn’t feel anything- my grandma had a serious fall, went to the hospital, and I was just numb.
-I have a hard time starting to do anything-I’m usually okay once I start, but it’s super hard for me to get motivated to start things.
This is the most honest I’ve been with anyone in a long time; I’m petrified of telling my family any of this (they don’t know) because…. I don’t know why. I can’t imagine myself ever telling anyone in real life. I think maybe a therapist would help, even if I don’t have a specific problem, but again…. Back to the whole telling people thing. Maybe I’m just overreacting (yeah, another thing… I tend to downplay myself) but maybe I’m not… any help in helping me identify a diagnosis or a next step would be GREATLY appreciated, you have no idea…. You’re the only people I trust and I have no idea what to do next. Thank you.

[gayleggg]

I would get a therapist. Build trust so that you can confide in the therapist and maybe get some answers. There is nothing like one on one with a therapist to help with difficult situations.

assemble a mental healthcare team. Start with your family doctor. He/she can get the ball rolling and refer you to a psychiatrist and ultimately a therapist. I am fond of CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) but not a lot of therapists are trained in it. Still, there are some great books out there. The key though is not to go through the workbook all at once. Most are designed to take about 12wks to complete.

[BLUEDOVE]

I read it is a fear of death,i.e.you cant very well die,
if you have all that stuff you're putting off to do?
Because,if you did it,it would be a question of : "right,
that's done,now,what do I do?"

[Lost_in_the_woods]

First off sorry im late responding.. i see this is your first post! So Hello and to PC!
Being your first post, this is a giant step forward! I greatly admire your bravery and honesty. This is a wonderful caring support community. Please keep writing and explore different areas of the site and u hope you find wisdom comfort and understanding. The indiviuals on this site have lots to offer and give. I highly suggest either reposting this or at least posting a short introduction in The New Members Forum. There more people will see your post and have a chance to offer advice and get to know you. ....unfortunately the one thing we can not give you is a diagnosis. Only a trained professional can make a diagnosis after meeting and evaluationing your symptoms and concerns in person. Im glad you found this site if you have any questions about the site or any concerns at all please know that you are welcome to PM myself or any of the other wonderfully knowledgeable Community Liasons and Moderators. We are more than happy to help and will do our best to answer your questions and direct you to the brst suited information and forums.

[CANDC]

Hi CCLM. Welcome to Psych Central. I am sorry you have felt so badly so much lately. It is not always easy to know what it is. Sometimes it can be physical, sometimes psychological.

It is difficult for professionals to diagnose accurately after 3 or more 45 minute sessions face to face, so self diagnosis or online diagnosis is prone to error. So none of us here can really tell you for sure what is the matter.

Best thing to do is see a therapist and a psych doc and try to get meds and talk therapy to help keep you feeling stable. You can also ask the volunteer therapist here:
Ask the Therapist

Sleep is one of the most important ways to deal with challenges. I used to come home from school and take a nap I was so stressed after school. Sleeping can make a big difference. But sleeping too much can be a sign of depression. How are you sleeping?

Many people here at PC find they can share these feelings and what they are going through with the confidence that people go through similar things and can empathize. So many forums are offered as well as Chatrooms (after you have 5 posts or comments on others posts). Depression chat meets on Thursday night at 9pm EDT and Anxiety Friday at 8PM EDT.

In the meantime, lifestyle changes can give a little boost. Here are some of the things that help me. I have to watch what I eat because foods I eat can stabilize my moods or exaggerate them. A high protein low carb diet with snacks or meals every 3-4 hours will over time reduce my swings. I also avoid alcohol and recreational drugs because those can really increase depression.

Other lifestyle changes that help me are doing yoga, exercises, mindfulness, calm music, and being active on Psych Central.

[seesaw]

[sandworm]

May i make an offer. do not ask me who i got this from; it is my own creation.

The 24 Happy discoveries:

The insight about rules: When you follow a rule and sometimes it does not give the results you want, do not switch the good rule out, but rather seek to polish and improve the rule so that it works more frequently. Don’t seek to make a rule to work near-perfect or at a 100 %, for life is unpredictable by nature. Accept the approximations rules work in.

The rule of all rules to obey, even if you choose to ignore all rules but only ~this~ one.
Wherever you go, make it the place to be. Whatever you do, make it the thing to be doing. Be in Joy and be cool everywhere and with everyone.

===.
1. Don’t take it all so damn seriously. GET Over yourself.
2. Avoid divisive views.
3. Avoid two-Valued thinking traps; because very few decisions are choices between right and wrong or good and bad.
4. Avoid using any judgmental-ism.
5. Avoid having expectations.
6. Don’t make assumptions.
7. Don’t take it personally.
8. Mistakes are life; regrets are life. Learn from those or let them go.
9. Don’t lose the Bubble due to life’s ups and downs. The Bubble is the mind frame and attitude of being up and in the game.
10. Let go of wanting to be in control.
11. Don’t worry, be happy.
=====.
[ 1. Be fearless.
[ 2. Get curious; Get inspired.
[ 3. Be grateful for All
[ 4. Be fun.
[ 5. Just get it done. Stop dragging your feet.
[ 6. Be positive in all relations.
[ 7. Let go of wanting to know the future.
[ 8. Get and Stay bemused.
[ 9. Learn to know and feel when enough is enough.
[ 10. ENJOY, make it play(ful).
[ 11. Love what is.
Now go love life fully.