[HALLIEBETH87]

Only my dad could have the honor in saying that people from ALL walks of life attended his funeral. Being a KVE officer for 21 years, it was not surprising to see KVE officers at the funeral home, although I must say I didn’t expect to see 30 or 40 all at once! My dad befriended the Amish community of Henry County. In the beginning of the friendship, it was simply an Amish man by the name of Alvin (who take of our horse’s shoes). Later on, my dad who take the younger men fishing and the preacher’s son, August, would come to my dad’s house to ‘work’ (work being code for, my dad allowed him to drink beer and watch Westerns).

My dad died 2 days before his 13th wedding anniversary, was buried 10 days shy of his 46th birthday and left us 6 months before he was set to retire. But, he sure did get a send off! I do not think he ever fathomed his funeral being held with such high honor. The funeral procession was escorted by at least a dozen KVE cruisers, my dad’s being in front of the hurse which held him....he even got flashing lights the whole way.

Now the cemetery portion of the funeral has always been, for me, the most uncomfortable part. But, none have felt so strange as my father’s final goodbye. A KVE honor guard was at the grave site, and while I knew they would be doing the flag folding...I did not expect the whole sha-bang. All of the KVE attendees, stood at attention on the hillside. As they removed the American flag which was draped over my father’s casket, I felt..numb. They stood at a sorrowful attention, holding the outstretched flag as the firing squad proceeded to fire three shots.....all of which scared the living %#@&#! out of every individual present. They then began to fold the flag, after which a bugle player played Taps. How strange a day, indeed. And this was simply at the grave site!

I have a weeks’s worth of stories from these past four loooong days, but do not feel like sharing them at this time. Except...a few things my family and I took notice of about my step-mother during this experience.


-For a woman who has just lost a husband she "loved so much"....she did not shed a tear. Now, she held a tissue, wiped her face excessively, and made moaning noises, but they were never any genuine tears.

-Maggie’s family does not hate me. When I was outside the funeral home by myself, or gathering flowers after the service...there were many hugs and exchanges of caring notions. They just could not speak to me when Maggie was present.

-Maggie has no respect. She stood by the casket the entire evening. Towards the end, she was standing up there....drinking a can of coke RIGHT BESIDE my father’s casket. *****.

-Maggie is still selfish and stupid, basically. She spent most of the morning yesterday, standing beside the casket, feeling along the side (INSIDE the casket) for things someone may have out in there. haha Silly Maggie, I am smarter than you. The birthday card I bought him is in his casket beneath his feet. I win!

-At the grave site, after the service, I approached Maggie and spoke to her without fear. I simply stated that music was a large part of my father’s life, as it is mine. And, I inquired as to whether she would give allow me to have one of his instruments. She then got the same tone of voice I have heard so many times before, and she got the " I am going to kill you" look and said, "What do you want?" I told her, "One of my father’s instruments" and she walked away all pissed off. She thinks I am hurt because she walked away with no answer and an attitude...yes, it was rube, I win again. I knew she would not allow it, but the fact of the matter was....I just wanted to show her she holds no fear over me and I will not take anything from her.



I believe this is the longest post I have every composed, but its not even half as long as the whole ordeal has been.


Peas and Hominy,

Hal-Hal-e Bee

[Raynaadi]

(((( Hallie )))))

I didn't know you had just lost your dad. I wish I had comforting words....you seem to be holding up pretty well.

[Gem01]

Hi Haliie
Sorry about youre dad. I understand. I lost my mum 9 years ago in december.
I care. You be strong. Here for you and listening.
((((((Hugs))))))) to you hunnie.
Love Gem01 xxx

[lenjan]

((((((((Halliebeth))))))) I'm so sorry about your dad. I lost mine 8 years ago. He was career Navy and had a similar sort of ceremony as you described. It was tough, for sure.

I just wanted to say I read your post and I'm really, really proud of you. You have grown enormously since you first started coming to PC. I think the way you handled your stepmom is awesome, and it had to feel good and be very healing.

Much love and hugs to you. Your progress is inspiring.

Candy

[Islander]

Hallie -

I am really sorry to hear about you dad. It is almost a year for my mother. I understand the pain you are going through. I will keep you in my thoughts.

Islander

[lonelygirl22]

(((((((((((((((((Hugs)))))))))))))))))

[sabby]

(((((((((((((((((((((( Halliebeth )))))))))))))))))))))))

I send you comforting thoughts and prayers. I'm sure the past week has been very difficult for you. I'm sorry for the loss of your beloved father. I'm sure he is watching over you and sending his love to help you through your grief.

*Gentle Hugs*
sabby

[eskielover]

(((((((((((((Halliebeth))))))))))))),

I am sorry for the loss of your Dad. I know how hard it is to loose parents. My Dad died almost 17 years ago, but my Mom died just 2 1/2 years ago. I think it's wonderful for your Father to have had such a special, respectful funeral service. Is is a great way to honor his life & for you to keep as the final memory of him. I am not familiar as to who the KVE are. But to have them all there as the honor guard had to be an awsome send off for your Father.

I am sorry that his wife is such a horid step Mother. She should understand the pain that you all are going through & treat you all with as much respect as she would expect to be treated herself. She does sound like an insensitive person. The problem with the lack of tears may be that she is still in shock.....I know that the state I was in for my Mothers funeral made it so that I don't remember much about the day.

I just currently purchased a farm in Kentucky....Harrodsburg, Mercer County to be exact....which is in the southern part of Central Kentucky.....it that anywhere close to where you are located? I am a native Californian for 54 years, so Kentucky is a huge move & there are a lot of wonderful people I have met while there working on my house. I know we have a small amish community close to my farm in McAfee Kentucky....on the 127. They are very kind people, so I can understand how your father could become close with them. They truely show their love for people who are kind.....so your Father had to be a very special person.

My prayers are with you....that you stay strong & able to keep the relationship with your step Mother at a place where you are in control (as it seems you are at this point). I know this is a very hard time & difficult to loose your Father.

Hugz,
Debbie

[January]

(((((((((( HallieBeth ))))))))))))

I'm so sorry for the loss of your beloved father. It sounds like you have grown a lot in these last few days. I'm glad you're not afraid of your stepmother now. I'm so glad you were able to put his birthday card in the casket.

Hugs,

Jan

[(JD)]

[bebop]

I am really sorry for your loss. words are never enough in times like this. (((hugs)))

[HALLIEBETH87]

thank u for the responses. KVE= kentucky vehicle enforcement...cops in gold cruisers who give u tickets! haha mercer co is a little bit away from me...i am in henry county which is an hour from louisville and an hour from frankfort. i happen to love ky, hope u will too.

[eskielover]

Hallie,

I looked up the KVE....sounds like it is mostly for commercial vehichles, or anything unsafe on the highways. It looks like Henry County is North-east from Louisville on the map. Frankfort is between Harrodsburg & Louisville, about 1/2 hour + from where I live.....so now I know where you are located in relationship to Harrodsburg.

I am so in love with Kentucky.....I have seen beauty all over the US & Canada with the rocky mountains & glaciers, the Pacific Ocean & cliffs, the baren deserts with Joshua trees & tumble weeds, to the priaries in Kansas & Nebraska. I have to say that the rolling green hills & woods in Kentucky are gorgeous & peaceful. I never thought I would own land that is like owning a park....miricles are never ending in my life. Looking out the windows of my house to the beauty right outside is beyond what I ever imagined could be.

You are lucky to have grown up in such a beautiful country side with your family. Your father was in a very wonderful profession....to look out after the safety of the people on the highways there. It is wonderful that you were able to see how many people loved & cared for him. I'm sure that adds to how proud you already were of him.

My prayers for you,
Debbie

[Soidhonia]

(((HALLIEBETH))). I am sorry for the loss of your father. Take care of yourself. PM anytime Hallie. Soidhonia

[alyssa_angel]

im glad he had such a good send off, my thoughts are with you, i really hope your ok

*love and hugs*

[wickedwings]

lol. you're a smart girl, hallie, putting his birthday card beneath his feet. (((((hugs))))) you did great handling your stepmom.

[EJ711]

Hallie,

I'm so sorry for the loss of your dear father. It sounds like he was a very beloved man, who loved all people. How wonderful that he was honored in such a magnificent manner.

(((((((Hallie)))))))

EJ