[Sevranyunei]

My wife has been wearing different nightwear lately... usually what she wears doesn't affect me like this, but recently it has been... I think it's scaring me because my processing disorders are making it difficult to process the new clothing and recognize that it's her... And I think that's happening because of this game that really damaged me (Doki Doki Literature Club)... ever since the experience, my wife and I have been comforting and cuddling with eachother as much as possible. I told my wife that I don't know what I would do if I ever lost her... and I know she feels the same way about me. I think the difficulty processing that's controlling me is terrifying me for that reason. I want so badly to be able to process that she's right here with me but my mind isn't letting me... I feel so much fear right now. My wife is doing everything she can think of... And it's helping me to not shake as much, but I want to do whatever I can to feel better...

Every day my wife and I cuddle with eachother, telling eachother how much we love eachother, she can sense the unhappy memories of that game still haunting me, but knowing that she's here with me, hugging me and comforting me, knowing that she and I are married and always will be, that we'll always love eachother more than anything in existence... it makes me so happy, it warms me heart

So... the uncertainty that it's her here with me, it's scaring me. Deep down I knows it's her, but these processing disorders are making it so hard for me to process it... at least I think thats whats causing it... my mind keeps asking "is it really her?" "Am I sure its not somebody posing as her?" and stuff like that. It's terrifying me. I don't know what to do

[MickeyCheeky]

Do you see a therapist?

[Sevranyunei]

Originally Posted by MickeyCheeky

Do you see a therapist?

I try to, but finding the opportunity to schedule any appointments is difficult. Especially since right now I am temporarily unemployed due to my workplace being closed for renovations.

[Loose Screw x 2]

I don't know if it is aloud in this area to say this but, I just said a prayer for you. I want you to have a cup of warm milk or decaf coffee and some cake or other comfort food and try to get ahold of yourself. Do you think that you can do that? Just close your eyes and take deep breaths and try to think comforting thoughts. Just focus on relaxing. Try listening to some soft music or have your wife light a candle, turn off all of the lights or the two of you go into a dark room and set the candle somewhere safe and sit in silence as you watch the shadows dance on the wall. As long as you aren't afraid of the dark this should help to calm your nerves. Think about your muscles relaxing and turning to jelly or jello if that helps and just let go.