I'm new here**first post

Hello all,
I found this website this morning. I'm a SAHM (stay at home mom) with two daughters, 7/30/99 & 10/13/91. I'm married to a wonderful guy who almost understands me. He tries to anyway! My biggest sadness as of late has been anticipating my youngest daughter starting kindergarten next month. I just start crying my eyes out, especially when I'm trying to fall asleep at night. I was making breakfast this morning and just bursted out crying. I'm going to be a mess when my husband and I drop her off at school. I didn't get this upset with my first child starting school. Perhaps it's due to not having any other children. DH and I feel two kids are enough and on most days I have to agree with him on that. I still keep the crib and stroller ohh and the high chair 'just because' My husband has a hard time with trying to figure out why I want to keep such things... <sigh> Anyhoo, I'm teaching myself to knit--really a lot of fun. Also I keep busy around the house, I hate to drive anymore. What is wrong with me. I just don't feel like myself at all anymore. We moved to a town 2 hours from where I'm originally from, needless to say my parents and other relatives are there, not here. We have no family here except ourselves. I don't have a babysitter so that means we don't go anywhere together (alone). I feel isolated most of the time. which is due to not making friends with co-workers (I don't work) outside my home. There is much more but right now I'm so sad (for me) and happy too for my daughter's new beginning at school. I feel better some days then it hits me all over again Today is my youngest daughter's birthday. What to do?? I know it helps to talk to others, perhaps others who are in the same boat. That is why I found this website/forum, I just .... I hate the way I feel. I need some feedback. Eeep!

Decogirl,
Welcome!! I am glad that you found this place and I hope that you find it helpful. I do not have children, but I can only imagine how hard it must be to see them grow up before your eyes. Maybe now that your youngest is starting school you could get a part time job or do some volunteering? It could give you something to do while your kids are at school and it would probably help with your sadness of having them away because you were helping others.
I suffer from depression and I know that when I keep busy I feel sooo much better. I was happy to see that you have started knitting. My mom does that and I could never figure it out (laugh).

Stay strong,
Jessica

<font color=blue>The worst is over now and we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away
There’s so much left to learn, and no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain</font color=blue>

Welcome!
My middle child is starting kindergarden, but I still have one to go.
I remember the sadness I felt when I didn't have to buy diapers any more. Silly, but sad.
They are growing aren't they?

gab

Oh you aren't losing them! Why not sign up for the PTA? I'm also sure the class rooms need parent helpers each week, you could sign up for a few of those... and the school needs help with the holiday acitivities right?

How about Scouting? They offer free training too, which will help in the future too... or can lead to administrative leads... is that redundant?

Ok yeah they grow... but each level of growth is a treasure. GET out your camera Momma, they are about to show you stuff!

<font color=blue> meditation is a true way to connect to the Source </font color=blue>

PS Welcome!
<div class="foot">(Edited by SkyBdark on 07/30/04 06:37 PM.)</div>

Thank you all for your kind, supportive words of wisdom! It helped to read all your replies, it really did!
The volunteering, pta and perhaps getting a part time job sound like the right path to take thus far.
I certainly do feel overwhelmed with the way the world is today. I feel very protective of my kids as do all good mothers.
One day at a time never made so much sense to me as it does right now.
I'm sooo glad to have found this website/message board.

Thank you for taking the time to reply,

Stephanie

Hi Stephanie,

I can feel your stress when I read your post, especially since I've been there. It is overwhelming not to have time to yourself, even though it is hard to let go. Getting a break sometimes is very important for SAHM's. Just some kind of change of pace. It sounds like you have some good strategies to try for that. You could also see if there are other moms in your area who would trade babysitting with you sometimes. You need to find some friends who are adults. Going to activities with other moms and kids is good too - if you don't know of any, think about starting something.

Hang in there!
Wendy

<font color=orange>"If a light beckons to you, follow it. If it leads you into the quagmire, you'll probably find your way out of it again; but if you don't follow it, you'll be plagued for the rest of your life by the thought that perhaps it was your star." Friedrich Hebbet</font color=orange>

Hi decogirl,

Welcome to the forums! I'm sorry to hear about your sadness over your daughter starting school. It's been a long time for me, but I can remember being a little sad when my kids started too. But it passed in time. Sky's idea about joining the PTA, or volunteering to help out in your daughter's class is an excellent one. That will keep you close to her and busy at the same time.

Well, I'm glad you found the forums, and I hope you get the same love and support that I've gotten here. It's a wonderful group here that keeps me in line

All my best,
Greg



"Beauty is truth, truth is beauty - that is all you know on earth, and all you need to know"