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Q&A Leader
Member Since Jan 2006
Location: Here
Posts: 94,092
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#1
What's with all the flipping leaving posts??? I have said before that members find it triggering when people threaten to leave. What's the matter? Aren't we good enough for you?? __________________ Pegasus Got a quick question related to mental health or a treatment? Ask it here General Q&A Forum “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by it's ability to climb a tree, it will live it's whole life believing that it is stupid.” - Albert Einstein |
Wise Elder
Member Since Jul 2004
Location: PA USA
Posts: 7,878
20 14 hugs
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#2
perhaps they have found other ways for support
as for me I'm staying, like the old saying goes " When the going gets tough , the tough get going " I'm staying for the much needed support and to help others when I can xoxoxoxo Angie __________________ A good day is when the crap hits the fan and I have time to duck. |
Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2005
Location: a small locked room in my head
Posts: 7,954
19 235 hugs
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#3
im staying...... like the old saying.. "never burn your bridges" .
but i too am thinking , what the hell is up with everyone leaving __________________ lifes a game, i no longer wish to play |
Account Suspended
Member Since Mar 2003
Location: Rocky Mtn High, love all :)
Posts: 12,724
21 |
#4
ditto?
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Legendary
Member Since Oct 2005
Location: cornwall/united kingdom
Posts: 11,157
19 112 hugs
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#5
yes whats up here if its something to do with pc it needs to be sorted lots have left or are not posting anymore
__________________ No kind action ever stops with itself. One kind action leads to another. Good example is followed. A single act of kindness throws out roots in all directions, and the roots spring up and make new trees. The greatest work that kindness does to others is that it makes them kind themselves. |
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#6
I am sorry that people are triggered truly I am....maybe I should just have gone quietly like I was going to ... but then people would think I was heartless just leaving when you all have been so good to me ... there is nothing wrong, I just need to leave to look after ME which is what my T wants me to do ....
sometimes I am triggered here too, I have left my e.mail for people to contact me, I dont want to just leave and forget everyone ..... please understand this ... whichever way I chose to leave it wouldn't have pleased everyone ..... I would love to hear from my friends and everyone who has helped me so much... please also know I dont want to leave with bad feeling ... because that would hurt so much .... I just need to heal in my own way and maybe pc is just not that way right now .... this is MY PROBLEM noone elses, but I find replies were getting less and less and that is a trigger ... to ME ... this is not a reflection on anyone else ..... I know people struggle at this time of year.... If anyone needs to talk, you have my e.mail I am not abandoning anyone.... that sound conceited it's not meant that way.... grrrr just know I care and always will and I'm sorry Jinny |
Most Legendary Elder
Member Since Jul 2003
Location: CA
Posts: 22,211
(SuperPoster!)
21 397 hugs
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#7
{{{{{{{{{{{{{Peg}}}}}}}}}}}}}} I don't know. I don't read them because I've found that most of the people that say they are leaving... don't.
People coming in and out of our lives isn't anything unusual. It happens all the time both in 3D and here. It's a good think that if some people don't like what PC is all about, that they find a place that does suit them. Don't worry, Sweety. PC will still be here for a very loooooooooong time! There's no place like it anywhere else on the web! __________________ Psalm 119:105 Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path. |
Magnate
Member Since Sep 2007
Location: Sch of hard knocks.
Posts: 2,179
17 |
#8
Yeah it feels a bit disturbing KEEP reading the leaving posts, there feels like an uncurrent of tension.
__________________ Here is the test to find whether your mission on earth is finished. If you're alive, it isn't. ~Richard Bach |
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#9
</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
therealme said: im staying...... like the old saying.. "never burn your bridges" . but i too am thinking , what the hell is up with everyone leaving </div></font></blockquote><font class="post"> ditto as nowhereto run said |
Guest
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#10
Well, I think that sometimes we need to move on from types of support too. Like if you were in a therapy group that you found just wasn't working for you(wasn't necessarily bad, just not working for you) you would choose to move on to other things. I don't think its mostly ever meant as a slag against other members or the site. And if there is a problem with another member or the site, I would hope that the member would feel strong enough to message admin and try to work it out. Sometimes we just have to do what we have to do though.
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Grand Magnate
Member Since May 2004
Posts: 4,415
20 |
#11
Maybe we should all keep being as loving and supportive as we know how. That is not in begging people to stay but in accepting that if they need to be gone for a bit, or forever, we support that. No judgement, just friendship.
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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#12
I wish ow I had gone quietly,I am doing this for reasons of my own .... I never once said PC was not the right place for me and I resent the remark ..... I love pc and all the suport I have received from many ......
If I have caused any pain then I appologise ... pc is a great place and a lot of people have had fantastic support and will continue to do so ..... thankyou for understanding Rainbowz...... Jinny |
Guest
Posts: n/a
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#13
((((((wisewoman)))))
I can see why you chose the name .... you ARE very wise and right too .... hugs, Jinny |
Grand Poohbah
Member Since Feb 2007
Location: The place where X marks the spot.
Posts: 1,848
17 |
#14
<blockquote>
It's worth considering that this forum is designed to be a therapeutic community. People leave therapeutic relationships for one of two reasons: 1: They need a different kind of therapy. 2: They no longer need therapy. To me, both reasons are positive. If a person realizes that they need a different kind of therapy, that means they've moved into the kind of space where they can recognize whether or not their chosen therapy is helping them. And that's good. Alternatively, if a person has moved into the space where they no longer need therapy, that's also good. It means they recognize they're now capable of standing on their own two feet, none of which is to say they'll ever forget the people they leaned on along the way. Quite often, those people are not the ones who were walking ahead of them but rather, the ones who were walking alongside or pushing from behind. Compassion or the sense of shared humanity, of our kinship with each other, this is what heals. -- Pema Chodron I have some people in my own life who know how important they are to me. When there was no one else, those people were there for me. I remain grateful for the strength they allowed me to borrow on but I also know that they're pleased that I'm capable of moving on in my own life by my self now, because of them. It's to be expected that there might be a bit of sadness over such moments. But also happiness for the other who is moving on either because they're ready to do so or because they recognize that they need something different. Each of us must be true to our own path. Music of the Hour: __________________ ~ Kindness is cheap. It's unkindness that always demands the highest price. |
Wise Elder
Member Since Jan 2006
Location: Florida
Posts: 9,946
18 1 hugs
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#15
Some people find it threatening to their survival when they are dealing with mental illness and they come here seeking support and yet find the very opposite.......
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2003
Location: Coram Deo
Posts: 35,474
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#16
There are those also who just can't fit into a site like this (not referring to anyone specifically.) We need to always remember that some ppl can't hear what others say, or at least not correctly, some are not ready for support like this. It is a different venue, to say the least.
I doubt that any member who is truly "finding the opposite" of support has gone unnoticed by the Community Team, unless they only visit the chat rooms and no one has said anything to admin. Still, there are avenues to take to stop any non-supportive behavior by other members. Unfortunately, it does happen. It's because everyone is at a different level of healing, and most are suffering with some type of disorder to begin with. IMO, if someone feels unsupported, and other members know first hand of this, it's those member's responsibility to gird up the one member and also help admin and community team realize what's happening. Sometimes those other members, also because of their disorder and level of healing, can make the situation worse. It's always unfortunate imo when someone leaves because they feel unsupported, for that is truly unnecessary. I don't think there is any way to let the membership at large, the daily renewing membership, to know that there will be times they might feel like leaving, and that often it's just a phase (so to speak) and that there's no reason to leave or tell everyone that, as you can always come back to PC and read, and send a PM to a new friend etc.... and that many ppl who do announce they are leaving, do end up back here for support and then have (imo unnecessary) embarrassment for returning. __________________ |
Elder
Member Since Oct 2007
Location: Midwest
Posts: 5,042
17 1 hugs
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#17
The amount of exit posts surprised me too. I'm not speaking to anyone directly, I just wondering, why the post? Why close the account?
Jinny I understand what you're saying about not wanting people to think that you just blew them off, and I only mention you by name because you've replied to the thread. This is going to sound childish and petty, and I really don't mean it that way, I just can't think of another way to word it. But why wouldn't you post something like "Hey, going to be busy for a while, I don't want to lose touch, here's my email address?" Instead of a grand exit? Maybe I'm reading too much into it, projecting my own issues onto the situation. If you don't mind answering, again I ask you because you've responded to the thread, why are you closing your account? I really did not mean to offend, I just could not resist the opportunity to ask a question that has been bothering me since I started reading the forums. Thank you for responding, and if you do not, I respect your wishes not to. __________________ I've been married for 24 years and have four wonderful children. |
Veteran Member
Member Since Jun 2007
Posts: 498
17 |
#18
..personally i will say that for me....sometimes i plan on more than leaving..and just want to say goodbye..and thanks..stuff like that. im sorry if my "closest-thing-to-a-suicide-note-PC-will-allow" is unwelcome. but i thought this site was to support one another.. im not downplaying people's trigger's here but i am saying that unfortunately things pop up and people do things which they feel they need to for themselves and are unaware that it is affecting others. i dont think that entirely calls for a new post solely against those who need that specific support? maybe i should just shut up and go next time. "simplify the funeral" as they say. __________________ |
Account Suspended
Member Since Mar 2003
Location: Rocky Mtn High, love all :)
Posts: 12,724
21 |
#19
((((((blah_x))))))
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2003
Location: Coram Deo
Posts: 35,474
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20 1,651 hugs
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#20
</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
personally i will say that for me....sometimes i plan on more than leaving..and just want to say goodbye..and thanks..stuff like that. im sorry if my "closest-thing-to-a-suicide-note-PC-will-allow" is unwelcome. but i thought this site was to support one another.. </div></font></blockquote><font class="post"> how can we give anyone support when they are closed to options? Are you saying you post goodbye when you need support instead? __________________ |
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