How long have you suffered from mental health symptoms?

I'm pretty sure I had an anxiety disorder even as a child.


Re the original question, I'm hesitant to use the word "suffered" with my own mental health stuff. It just sounds so negative.

I was pretty stable for most of high school too, albeit, quite a negative thinker.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitto Wow, I actually think about this somewhat regularly. I remember disassociating as far back as three years old. I started group therapy when I was in first or second grade and had an outside counsellor from middle school through graduation. My first trip to the hospital was when I was nineteen. Between middle school and 19 I had at least two sudo diagnoses, as you cannot properly diagnose a child. My first two were passive aggressive and antisocial. I got a diagnosis of severe depression when in hospital for first time. I am hoping that I have broken the cycle of abuse and trauma. I also know that the boundaries I have put in place have been extremely helpful in reducing my stress levels; therefore reducing depression and anxiety, as well as any potentially more severe symptoms like delusions or hallucinations.

For far too long and something has to give. I am glad that I have gotten busy living but maybe it is not quite enough.

This (what *I* bolded) is interesting and I can see how saying "you can get better" can add to stigma of mental illness.

At the same time, I am working on my own recovery. I've been working on it diligently for years and I feel I am only finally getting the hang of it. Which I'm grateful for. I can see how I may have a privilege in a sense, in that...I have access to good therapy, and my meds are working well for me.

Every thing was fine in my life. Got my degrees, had my computer engineering career for 15 years. My career defined who I was. When aerospace industry crashed & I couldn't get a job when I was 42, I had a breakdown that got worse rather than better with a PDOC & therapy. I didn't understand what all was going on but was diagnosed with major depression & major anxiety & ended up on disability after I have no idea how many suicide attempts. The most miserable 13 years of my life, topped off by a trauma & several bouts with anorexia where I ended up in the medical hospital.

Fast forward to leaving my marriage after 33 years & moving across the country to start a new life on a little farm I bought in the country when I was 54. I settled in & all the depression & anxiety pretty much went away. I found a wonderful therapist I did an intensive 2 years of group DBT & had her as my private T also. Learned skills that made me even more functional but that also pointed out that I had grown up with dysfunctional parents & some of my coping skills didn't work around functional people I had made good friends with after moving. It also pointed out how totally dysfunctional my husband was & still is even now divorced. It was hard to learn that I didn't have to fight to survive in my life any more & I could actually have a peaceful life.

In my case what I had experienced was situational depression & anxiety that no one recognized or helped me recognize when I was living in it. Meds only caused horrible reactions in my body & the therapy was useless there. Only leaving the situation/marriage & not having the mental health issues actually follow me but could be finally worked through & understood proved it was a situational condition. Life is now even better than it ever was & I am much more functional at 68 than I ever was before because I have learned new ways of dealing with issues & reinforced those that had been working. I also don't have the dysfunctional people pounding at me on a daily basis so when I run into issues I have quiet recovery time to analyze what I experience & what I need to do to resolve issues. I am seriously more functional at my age than ever before in my life & so thankful for the wonderful T I have had & all the wonderful people now in my life & finally feel free

Formally speaking, I believe my anxiety symptoms started in my 30's, after a whirlwind of really bad personal tragedies knocked me down repeatedly. I did not recognize it as anxiety, per se. I put it down to early menopause, as my late mother had developed some of the same kinds of problems around the time she started menopause. It was the classic stuff---trouble sleeping (when I had never experience that before in my life), suddenly feeling very agitated and perspiring heavily for almost no reason, the jitters and trouble gathering my thoughts, & making myself understood. There was something else, also completely new to me: a touch of burgeoning social anxiety.

It was about 7 years after that, I wad diagnosed with major depressive disorder, as well. It crept up on me like a stealthy burglar. Due to the fact that I had no one in my life who could give me wise advice, and also because I had come to Canada from the States, and wasn't set-up with my own GP yet, it took me almost two years to get concerned enough to make an appointment for a doctor. I was newly-married, and the symptoms were not too awful, yet.

My depression had gotten very very bad because I delayed seeing someone about it. I was terrified, and paralyzed, at the thought of the inevitable rounds of medication-taking, and struggling through all of that 'til I found one that worked for me. In truth, I probably should have been hospitalized for a bit, in those early days.

It's been an almost 25 year journey of discovery and education for me, all told. I'm doing much better in the last year or so, and am no longer on an antidepressant. I am still equipped with anti-anxiety meds for the odd situation, which still happens occasionally.

Bless you for wanting to help with the eradication of stigma around MI's. At least we live in a time where these things are finally being discussed!