advertisement
Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
wordshaker
Member
 
wordshaker's Avatar
wordshaker “She took a step and didn't want to take anymore, but she did.”
 
Member Since: Jan 2018
Location: Northeast
Posts: 315
5 yr Member
245 hugs
given
Default Apr 14, 2022 at 08:35 PM
  #1
I'm in a lot of pain. My situation. I lost job, friends, money, health, self respect, and sanity. Overnight. Very hard to take. Hard to hide it from kids. It's so much more than the lost job the kids see. It's lost job and all that brings, coming to terms with having a mental illness, rare brain stem tumor, betrayal of a friend, all the same time. I'm jumping through hoops now like you can't believe for $94 food stamps, couple hundred fuel assistance, can't get unemployment due to apparent attempted fraud problem, can't get social security card cuz the sent to wrong address. I'm utterly humiliated, sitting around takin a number, terrified about the future, failing at being unemployed, failing at failing. All my former sociopath spouse’s words are coming back to haunt me. I'm in so much pain. Please give me any words of wisdom. It’s a dark night. I’m trying to hang on.

__________________
“I wanted to ask her how the same thing could be so ugly and so glorious, and its words and stories so damning and brilliant...I AM HAUNTED BY HUMANS.”
—The Book Thief
wordshaker is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Breaking Dawn, downandlonely, Fuzzybear, mote.of.soul

advertisement
wordshaker
Member
 
wordshaker's Avatar
wordshaker “She took a step and didn't want to take anymore, but she did.”
 
Member Since: Jan 2018
Location: Northeast
Posts: 315
5 yr Member
245 hugs
given
Default Apr 15, 2022 at 05:03 AM
  #2
“If we shadows have offended,
Think but this, and all is mended,
That you have but slumbered here
While these visions did appear.
And this weak and idle theme,
No more yielding but a dream,
Gentles, do not reprehend:
If you pardon, we will mend:
And, as I am an honest Puck,
If we have unearned luck
Now to 'scape the serpent's tongue,
We will make amends ere long;
Else the Puck a liar call;
So, good night unto you all.
Give me your hands, if we be friends,
And Robin shall restore amends.

― William Shakespeare

Peace and love 🕊

__________________
“I wanted to ask her how the same thing could be so ugly and so glorious, and its words and stories so damning and brilliant...I AM HAUNTED BY HUMANS.”
—The Book Thief
wordshaker is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Breaking Dawn, Fuzzybear, mote.of.soul
Fuzzybear
Wisest Elder Ever
 
Fuzzybear's Avatar
Fuzzybear has no updates.
 
Member Since: Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,301 (SuperPoster!)
20 yr Member
81.2k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 15, 2022 at 08:10 AM
  #3
I’m sending love

__________________
Fuzzybear is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Breaking Dawn, downandlonely, mote.of.soul, wordshaker
 
Thanks for this!
wordshaker
Breaking Dawn
Legendary
 
Breaking Dawn's Avatar
Breaking Dawn Thankful for my blessings.
 
Member Since: Sep 2019
Location: USA
Posts: 16,689 (SuperPoster!)
3 yr Member
42.2k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Heart Apr 15, 2022 at 01:46 PM
  #4
Dear wordshaker, I wish you good health & happiness & for all of your troubles to be taken away. Thank you for sharing with us your thoughts & heart & A Midsummer Night's Dream. Love to you, wordshaker!

__________________
"Every moment is a fresh beginning." (T. S. Eliot)

"Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines."(Robert H. Schiuller)

* * * * * *
Breaking Dawn is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Fuzzybear, mote.of.soul, wordshaker
 
Thanks for this!
wordshaker
downandlonely
Legendary
 
downandlonely's Avatar
downandlonely has no updates.
 
Member Since: Mar 2018
Location: United States
Posts: 10,760 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
10.6k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 15, 2022 at 04:41 PM
  #5
I'm so sorry for all you're going through. I can't even imagine it.
downandlonely is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Breaking Dawn, Fuzzybear, mote.of.soul, wordshaker
 
Thanks for this!
wordshaker
wordshaker
Member
 
wordshaker's Avatar
wordshaker “She took a step and didn't want to take anymore, but she did.”
 
Member Since: Jan 2018
Location: Northeast
Posts: 315
5 yr Member
245 hugs
given
Default Apr 15, 2022 at 05:07 PM
  #6
I’m so grateful for your uplifting words. Thank you for adding your love to the collective unconscious. I’m hoping for healing in my body and mind and heart and your kind words mean everything to me. Sending love back at you. May each of us continue to be a blessing and a force for good and healing in this world.

__________________
“I wanted to ask her how the same thing could be so ugly and so glorious, and its words and stories so damning and brilliant...I AM HAUNTED BY HUMANS.”
—The Book Thief
wordshaker is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Breaking Dawn, downandlonely, Fuzzybear, mote.of.soul, Werewoman
 
Thanks for this!
Breaking Dawn, Fuzzybear
Aviza
Magnate
 
Aviza's Avatar
Aviza Calm
 
Member Since: Jan 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 2,456
10 yr Member
86 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 18, 2022 at 06:00 PM
  #7
I've been there, pray ask God for help He listens to our cries. He helped me but I failed to listen to even Jesus. I was so stuck in my misery even when shown what to do I didn't.
Possible trigger:
IMO. But Pray than listen to the guidance given even if it goes against all other guidance.

__________________
Son: 14, 12/15/2009 R.I.P.
Daughter: 20
Diagnosis: Bipolar with Psychosis. Latuda 100 mgs.

Last edited by downandlonely; Apr 19, 2022 at 01:14 PM.. Reason: Added trigger warning
Aviza is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Breaking Dawn, downandlonely, Fuzzybear, mote.of.soul, wordshaker
 
Thanks for this!
Breaking Dawn, wordshaker
wordshaker
Member
 
wordshaker's Avatar
wordshaker “She took a step and didn't want to take anymore, but she did.”
 
Member Since: Jan 2018
Location: Northeast
Posts: 315
5 yr Member
245 hugs
given
Default Apr 19, 2022 at 09:35 AM
  #8
Thank you for the uplifting reminder, I will add my prayers of peace and comfort and that your son be embraced in the healing love of the universe. He lives still.

__________________
“I wanted to ask her how the same thing could be so ugly and so glorious, and its words and stories so damning and brilliant...I AM HAUNTED BY HUMANS.”
—The Book Thief
wordshaker is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Breaking Dawn, Fuzzybear, mote.of.soul
downandlonely
Legendary
 
downandlonely's Avatar
downandlonely has no updates.
 
Member Since: Mar 2018
Location: United States
Posts: 10,760 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
10.6k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 19, 2022 at 01:15 PM
  #9
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aviza View Post
I've been there, pray ask God for help He listens to our cries. He helped me but I failed to listen to even Jesus. I was so stuck in my misery even when shown what to do I didn't.
Possible trigger:
IMO. But Pray than listen to the guidance given even if it goes against all other guidance.
I hope you are not blaming yourself for what your son did.
downandlonely is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Breaking Dawn, Fuzzybear, mote.of.soul, wordshaker
 
Thanks for this!
wordshaker
Aviza
Magnate
 
Aviza's Avatar
Aviza Calm
 
Member Since: Jan 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 2,456
10 yr Member
86 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 22, 2022 at 07:37 AM
  #10
I am responsible for him feeling unloved, forgotten, or whatever else he was feeling that caused him to end his life.

__________________
Son: 14, 12/15/2009 R.I.P.
Daughter: 20
Diagnosis: Bipolar with Psychosis. Latuda 100 mgs.
Aviza is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Breaking Dawn, downandlonely, wordshaker
wordshaker
Member
 
wordshaker's Avatar
wordshaker “She took a step and didn't want to take anymore, but she did.”
 
Member Since: Jan 2018
Location: Northeast
Posts: 315
5 yr Member
245 hugs
given
Default Apr 30, 2022 at 11:31 AM
  #11
@Aviza, I’m so sorry you feel this way. We all make mistakes, so easy to see in retrospect. We are blessed to be our children’s keepers for a time, but they are born their own being, with aspects of theirselves always beyond our reach. We can only do the best we can with what we’ve been given in the moment. Sending love.

__________________
“I wanted to ask her how the same thing could be so ugly and so glorious, and its words and stories so damning and brilliant...I AM HAUNTED BY HUMANS.”
—The Book Thief
wordshaker is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Breaking Dawn
downandlonely
Legendary
 
downandlonely's Avatar
downandlonely has no updates.
 
Member Since: Mar 2018
Location: United States
Posts: 10,760 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
10.6k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 30, 2022 at 02:11 PM
  #12
@Aviza you could not have known what he was going to do. I'm sure if you had known, you would have done all in your power to save him.
downandlonely is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Breaking Dawn, wordshaker
Breaking Dawn
Legendary
 
Breaking Dawn's Avatar
Breaking Dawn Thankful for my blessings.
 
Member Since: Sep 2019
Location: USA
Posts: 16,689 (SuperPoster!)
3 yr Member
42.2k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Heart Apr 30, 2022 at 05:05 PM
  #13
Dear wordshaker & Aviza, I was wondering how you feel about the song, "I Believe"? I don't know how to post links, but I know the words by heart. I love the piano music that I've heard behind singers, too. If you don't mind me saying the words here?, or consider this a trigger warning?

I believe for every drop of rain that falls, a flower grows.
I believe that somewhere in the darkest night, a candle glows.
I believe for everyone who goes astray, someme will come to show the way.
I believe. I believe.

I believe above the storm, the smallest prayer will still be heard.
I believe that someone in that great somewhere hears every word.

Every time I hear a newborn baby cry, or touch a leaf, or see the sky,
Then I know why
I believe.

If you are still reading, I hope you can youtube the song & get a good recording of it, if you want to hear it.
God bless you both!

__________________
"Every moment is a fresh beginning." (T. S. Eliot)

"Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines."(Robert H. Schiuller)

* * * * * *
Breaking Dawn is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
wordshaker
 
Thanks for this!
downandlonely
All times are GMT -5. The time now is 02:24 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.



 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.