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Default May 19, 2022 at 12:40 AM
  #1
Does anyone else struggle with leaving your place (house/apartment)? This could be your choice or not. I choose to not leave my apartment. I don't even like to leave my room. I feel most comfortable and safe and happy when I don't leave my apartment. When I do have to leave I get very anxious and worried about stuff; I'll get intrusive thoughts and obsess about things. It is extremely stressful to go out and I would rather not go out ever! I don't feel like I am doing anything wrong. It is not affecting anyone and it makes me happy. I understand that this could be a symptom of any disorder, such as anxiety, or agoraphobia, or PTSD, or a personality disorder. I am in treatment, I take meds and am in therapy. I must say my treatment is going the best it can possibly can. I am in the best position I have been in years. So all I want to know is if anyone can relate? Does anyone else not leave their place, whether it is your choice or not, or whether it makes you feel good or bad?
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Default May 19, 2022 at 04:33 AM
  #2
I have started to have anxiety about leaving the house. Part of the reason is it's just too painful to leave. I recently had a total knee replacement and am having some complications. Basiclly I just stay in the recliner in my bedroom and that's where I feel safe. Yesterday I was supposed to go to the doctors, I got so overwhelmed and anxiety ridden I canceled my appointment and rescheduled.

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Trig May 19, 2022 at 04:20 PM
  #3
I don't leave home any more than is necessary. And when I do it is typically with my wife. About the only thing I leave home alone for is to occasionally walk to a nearby pharmacy to pick up my prescription or to go for a short walk with my wife for exercise. (Personally I could do without it. But she likes it.) I get quite anxious when I'm out. Plus there are triggers everywhere.

We live in an urban area. And the traffic scares me to death (even though my wife does the driving.) Yesterday we were driving on one of the major city streets in our area. We came to a stop in the left-turn lane at a stoplight. But an SUV that was going straight blew through that red light at full speed! If any of the cross traffic had entered the intersection someone would have died, no doubt about it. And that's not something that's unusual to see where we live nowadays.

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Default May 19, 2022 at 06:45 PM
  #4
I didn't leave the apartment much for a year (March 2020 - April 2021) before I was vaccinated for Covid. I find that I like socializing on Zoom groups so that I don't have to drive.

If you're home all the time, do you ever feel lonely?
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Default May 19, 2022 at 06:55 PM
  #5
I seldom leave my apartment. I like being with my cats. Of course, covid really kept me in - just like everyone else. Sometimes I think I'm fine with staying in as much as I do...other times I think I'm fooling myself. It's hard to know. I think I wish more people would visit me, but I don't know who. I used to travel so much, all over the world. I look back and wonder how it could have been so easy for me then.

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Default May 19, 2022 at 07:35 PM
  #6
I’ve been fortunate enough to be in situation where I haven’t had to leave the house except for groceries and small errands, so you bet I never leave the house. If I could spend my whole life this way, I would. It’s not healthy I know but it’s a coping mechanism that I can’t shake. Tbh I usually don’t feel that bad unless I ruminate on it too long
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Default May 19, 2022 at 10:21 PM
  #7
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Originally Posted by downandlonely View Post
I didn't leave the apartment much for a year (March 2020 - April 2021) before I was vaccinated for Covid. I find that I like socializing on Zoom groups so that I don't have to drive.

If you're home all the time, do you ever feel lonely?
I might feel lonely about 10 percent of the time or less.
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Default May 20, 2022 at 10:01 PM
  #8
I live alone on the farm I own in a rural area. I go out for errands. Owning animals I do more shopping for them than myself. Also I get outside & mow my fields. I socialize but only things I like to do...love trail horseback riding but hate the bar scene that some of my friends like. Enjoy being at home & relax surrounded by nature. Had the perfect job during foaling season at the farm 1/4 mile down the road. Foal watch alone in a barn of 20 horses (pregnant mares) from 8pm to 4am. Nice & quiet except for snoring or groaning mares..lol....it was peaceful until a mare went into labor then the delivery crew arrived & the foal was born.

Some of my friends are like hyper when it comes to socializing....I am selective. I actually love the balance finally in my life.

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Default May 21, 2022 at 10:10 AM
  #9
I prefer to stay home now. I have been traumatized so much that I actually need peace and quiet.
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Default May 21, 2022 at 02:49 PM
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I prefer to stay home now. I have been traumatized so much that I actually need peace and quiet.
When I first moved here I was on the go constantly cause I ended up having many different groups of friends. I would be running out of the house telling my dogs they would get food when I got home cause I was always running late. Now it feels good to have settled down with local groups of friends & they have kinda melded together & getting my own priorities done first. Much more relaxing & peaceful & I am getting so much more done around my own farm. A large group of us from our horse group are going to see the new Downton Abby Movie next week & dinner after. For me that will be a nice change of pace

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Default May 21, 2022 at 07:45 PM
  #11
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Originally Posted by Capac View Post
I might feel lonely about 10 percent of the time or less.
I guess if you don't feel lonely it's not really a problem.
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Default May 24, 2022 at 01:43 PM
  #12
I've been agoraphobic. Like couldn't even walk down the short driveway to the mailbox. Maybe once you are, you're always somewhere on the spectrum?

That was more than a decade ago,, and after A LOT of CBT, I now consider myself a homebody.

I prefer to be home nowadays, but if I need to or want to go out, I don't think much about it. Back then, it was a struggle to get myself out of the house, even when I worked outside the house. There was a lot of mental preparedness beforehand.

Looking back, the biggest issue was that the agoraphobia was secondary to an anxiety disorder, so even at home, I wasn't always on a good place mentally. Now when I'm at home, I'm just at home, not usually too much anxiety.

So, in my opinion, I guess it depends. If you feel good and it's not holding you back from something else, then what does it matter?
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Default May 24, 2022 at 02:35 PM
  #13
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Originally Posted by Capac View Post
Does anyone else struggle with leaving your place (house/apartment)? This could be your choice or not. I choose to not leave my apartment. I don't even like to leave my room. I feel most comfortable and safe and happy when I don't leave my apartment. When I do have to leave I get very anxious and worried about stuff; I'll get intrusive thoughts and obsess about things. It is extremely stressful to go out and I would rather not go out ever! I don't feel like I am doing anything wrong. It is not affecting anyone and it makes me happy. I understand that this could be a symptom of any disorder, such as anxiety, or agoraphobia, or PTSD, or a personality disorder. I am in treatment, I take meds and am in therapy. I must say my treatment is going the best it can possibly can. I am in the best position I have been in years. So all I want to know is if anyone can relate? Does anyone else not leave their place, whether it is your choice or not, or whether it makes you feel good or bad?
I feel like this all the time. I stay in my bedroom all the time.

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Default Jun 08, 2022 at 01:56 PM
  #14
I can cope with taking my dog out when very few people are about luckily I live rurally so early morning walks I can go without seeing or passing another person or maybe an occasional cyclist/jogger or other dog walker. I also use a mobility scooter so I can move quicker and go a different way or get over the road quickly if someone is coming on my side of the path ..particularly if they have a dog too as my dog is quite reactive with other big dogs.


It's crowds and people that cause my anxiety and unpredictability. I can't take a taxi to town. I can't cope with the thought of appointments or having to go to work daily and 'deal with people' I can't go anywhere where I can't predict how many people will be at the other end.


Going to my brothers for a BBQ or tea is fine but I haven't been to a pub or a shopping centre for years or even the GP surgery in person.


I don't even go in my garden if too many neighbours are in theirs! ..and don't have any real life friends anymore to go anywhere with anyway.
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Default Jun 08, 2022 at 02:02 PM
  #15
I don't like people so I stay inside. Going to the store is a big chore. People around here are uneducated and don't take care of themselves. Freaks me out.

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Default Jun 08, 2022 at 02:19 PM
  #16
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Originally Posted by ArmorPlate108 View Post
I've been agoraphobic. Like couldn't even walk down the short driveway to the mailbox. Maybe once you are, you're always somewhere on the spectrum?

That was more than a decade ago,, and after A LOT of CBT, I now consider myself a homebody.

I prefer to be home nowadays, but if I need to or want to go out, I don't think much about it. Back then, it was a struggle to get myself out of the house, even when I worked outside the house. There was a lot of mental preparedness beforehand.

Looking back, the biggest issue was that the agoraphobia was secondary to an anxiety disorder, so even at home, I wasn't always on a good place mentally. Now when I'm at home, I'm just at home, not usually too much anxiety.

So, in my opinion, I guess it depends. If you feel good and it's not holding you back from something else, then what does it matter?
This is exactly how I am it's so similar I swear I wrote this haha. I've never been diagnosed with agoraphobia but I know I suffer from it by the shear terror I experience leaving my house. Like you said, even trips to the mailbox is hard. Hang in there. Glad to know I'm not alone in this though. No one understands so I'm happy someone out there does.
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Default Jun 11, 2022 at 12:24 PM
  #17
Would rather stay at home. I only leave the house when I need groceries.
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Default Oct 25, 2022 at 12:16 PM
  #18
I wouldn't say I like to leave the house either. I feel comfortable at home; I feel safe. I work remotely at a marketing agency, so I don't have to commute to work. In the last few years, delivery services have developed, so there is no need to go out for groceries.
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Default Oct 31, 2022 at 02:16 PM
  #19
My social anxiety was bad for years. I could not leave the house, and could barely drive myself anywhere. I only went shopping very late in the day, as much as possible. It's so hard to believe this could happen to me---driving used to be a joy before I was ill, and going to new places was a much-anticipated adventure.

A CBT course (it was a group course, run by our local MH initiative) taught me an awful lot about battling and conquering negative thought processes. I am always glad I took that course. I still utilize the techniques it taught me. It started right away to give me back some feeling of control, and a more normal perspective on just about everything. I believe it helped the most with my social anxiety.

Now, I'm just like everyone else---I WANT to start getting out & about again after Covid has mostly wrapped-up---but I don't hear a lot of assurances coming from the Science People about it. (I am all vaxxed and boosted, but I'm over 60, and a respiratory disease of that magnitude could kill me.) So, I'm hesitant.

I figure, I've gotten through the last 15 years without going here, there, and everywhere---I can wait one more year before I arrange a world tour!
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Default Oct 31, 2022 at 05:31 PM
  #20
Pre-covid and when I was working, I used to go out every day and never thought anything of it. Those first few weeks after covid hit, I was virtually climbing the walls, having been used to driving every day, being in all the time was a real challenge.
I couldn't imagine a time where I wasn't always driving and having to be somewhere.

Now I can't imagine going back to that life again. I can go for weeks without leaving the house. It feels safer (mental health wise) to stay indoors, but it's having a detrimental effect on my health generally.

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