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Monster on the Hill
Member Since Sep 2020
Location: by the river
Posts: 5,451
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#1
I mean, I want to, but I just can't?
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Grand Member
Member Since Aug 2023
Location: Netherlands
Posts: 753
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#2
What would you say the benefits of giving a ***** are versus not GAS? Seems like the more we care the more we get hurt?
The book The Art of Not Giving a ***** was very popular, lots of ppl must wish they cared less etc? |
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Monster on the Hill
Member Since Sep 2020
Location: by the river
Posts: 5,451
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#3
I mean, I don't care about getting arrested, getting injured, dying, losing relationships, or anything really and I feel like these are things that should matter to a person. Not that I particularly want these things to happen to me, I just don't avoid doing things that lead to those things.
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Grand Member
Member Since Aug 2023
Location: Netherlands
Posts: 753
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#4
That does seem like a reckless existence, not to consciously avoid things that would lead to suffering. I think ppl reading The Art of Not Giving a F probably just wanted to stop being sensitive, crying at work and catching feelings after a casual hookup, haha.
Maybe CBT and mindfulness can rewire the brain to think through actions & consequences. It's interesting so I hope someone here can shed some light. |
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Junior Member
Member Since Sep 2023
Location: In a Schoolie
Posts: 11
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#5
There’s a book called “the power of now by Eckhart Tolle“. It came to mind when I read your post. I don’t know if you read much but it’s not long and I’d recommend it.
__________________ I am not afraid. I was born to do this. ~ Jehanne D’Arc
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MuddyBoots
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Wood Ape
Member Since Jan 2018
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 13,580
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#6
Greetings MuddyBoots.
Giving a hoot, I believe, can be learned just in the same way a person can learn a new skill. And I'd offer as as an incentive that in learning it, your life should (and probably will) improve. Now when you said "Not that I particularly want these things to happen to me, I just don't avoid doing things that lead to those things" I actually take that as a yes you do give a shyt. It is time to take action😉 __________________ "A flower falls, even though we love it; and a weed grows, even though we do not love it."- Dōgen
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MuddyBoots
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Monster on the Hill
Member Since Sep 2020
Location: by the river
Posts: 5,451
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4 6,368 hugs
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#7
What would an improved life even look like? I've been home 3 days now and it's pretty much been wake up, crave drugs/alcohol, use/drink around appointments (had one Monday and one Tuesday), and listen to music while sporadically coming on here. I mean, I'm in a relationship and the other girl is all "I love you I love you I've been thinking about you all day and all night I love you let's have phone sex," and I'm down for the phone sex, but my "love you too" that she forces out of me ("do you love me too? you do still love me right?") has no meaning because I couldn't give a shyt about her.
Literally all my non abusive relationships are like this. I actually prefer the abusive ones to this. __________________ [Insert thought-provoking and comedic quote here] |
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mote.of.soul
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Monster on the Hill
Member Since Sep 2020
Location: by the river
Posts: 5,451
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#8
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Wood Ape
Member Since Jan 2018
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 13,580
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#9
Oh I can totally totally relate to not at all being able to visualise what life might be like after projected "improvement" @MuddyBoots. Absolutely. Because leading up to my decision to take that step into going to rehab (that was the start of my particular journey of change back in '98 when I was 29) I sat down and really thought hard about it. But just like you I couldn't imagine what an improved life could look like -, and I'd say a lot of people have that same experience. Anyway, but I reasoned to myself that in my case, whatever my life would look like it must surely be better than what I was living at the time. And I knew a lot of rock stars had embarked on that particular journey too (rehab, that is) and so I said to myself it must be worth taking that step. And in the event, almost immediately, things began to change for the better in ways I hadn't even considered MuddyBoots. It was amazing, that's all I can say, and I'm telling you the truth. And things continued to change. I don't want to mess with your head further but I'm not even the same person anymore. So that is what I'd like to share with you at this point.🙏
__________________ "A flower falls, even though we love it; and a weed grows, even though we do not love it."- Dōgen
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Wood Ape
Member Since Jan 2018
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 13,580
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#10
Continued:
It's been an up and down roller-coaster ride, I will say that, but what I said (above) is true. __________________ "A flower falls, even though we love it; and a weed grows, even though we do not love it."- Dōgen
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Monster on the Hill
Member Since Sep 2020
Location: by the river
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#11
I just got out of rehab and things were better... for 2 weeks, and then life took over.
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mote.of.soul
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Wood Ape
Member Since Jan 2018
Location: New Zealand
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#12
Well it doesn't have to be rehab specifically, your thread is about trying to improve your life in general right? So that's what I'm talking about. But in terms of rehab you could keep trying if you want to change. One shouldn't quit so readily otherwise this thread of yours is kinda pointless. I have to say it that way.
__________________ "A flower falls, even though we love it; and a weed grows, even though we do not love it."- Dōgen
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Wood Ape
Member Since Jan 2018
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 13,580
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#13
@MuddyBoots, all I'm saying is the only way to really know what your life will look like on the path of self improvement is to find out when you get there. It's the only way. Unless you have a crystal ball 🙏
__________________ "A flower falls, even though we love it; and a weed grows, even though we do not love it."- Dōgen
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Monster on the Hill
Member Since Sep 2020
Location: by the river
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#14
your right this ****ing thread is ****ing pointless. just. like. everything. else.
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Wood Ape
Member Since Jan 2018
Location: New Zealand
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#15
I'm sorry MuddyBoots. It's not pointless, I'm wrong about that. You're reaching out and that's a good thing. Keep posting please.
__________________ "A flower falls, even though we love it; and a weed grows, even though we do not love it."- Dōgen
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Monster on the Hill
Member Since Sep 2020
Location: by the river
Posts: 5,451
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#16
"In the end, it doesn't even matter."
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Wood Ape
Member Since Jan 2018
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 13,580
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#17
Chester🙏
__________________ "A flower falls, even though we love it; and a weed grows, even though we do not love it."- Dōgen
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2004
Location: Kentucky, USA
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#18
Not really learned. It is more about your heart & mind getting fed up with where you are & willing to make the positive changes needed to improve your life. It must be obvious to you that what you are currently doing isn't achieving what you want or you wouldn't have asked the question
__________________ Leo's favorite place was in the passenger seat of my truck. We went everywhere together like this. Leo my soulmate will live in my heart FOREVER Nov 1, 2002 - Dec 16, 2018 |
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Monster on the Hill
Member Since Sep 2020
Location: by the river
Posts: 5,451
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4 6,368 hugs
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#19
I want other people to stop saying "be safe," and "be careful."
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