[Row Jimmy]

It was a chain of normal, familiar events that ended badly, but I feel responsible. This afternoon, I took our dog for a ride, she got sick in the car, and then I brought her back home to give her a break and to clean up the car. She was mopey but nothing unusual - she was always embarrassed when she had an accident. I just laid her down in her bed and put some water next to her, figuring she might be dehydrated.

I left to pick up my kids at school and when I came back, she was gone. The vet said she had a heart attack due to low blood pressure. I feel responsible because I should have seen the signs but I was carrying her all the way from the car to the bed, so I missed it. My wife and kids are crushed. I'm sad and angry because I screwed up. I should have caught something, some sign, anything. But, of course, I was in a rush so I bolted back out the door to get my kids. I was on my way to get my kids when she got sick so I was late because I doubled back home. The vet says there was nothing I could have done and the clinic couldn't have even saved her but that doesn't make it any easier. The house just seems empty now. She was always the calming influence in an often chaotic environment.

Cripes why does life always get in the way? If I didn't take her for a ride, she'd still be here. If I wasn't in a rush, maybe I would have noticed something. My daughter said "now she has unlimited treats". Goodbye Phoebie, we will always love you.

[Marla500]

It's not your fault. I'm so sorry for your loss

[Row Jimmy]

Not three days ago, I posted in the BP forum how much I loved my dog. She was the biggest mooch on the planet. She'd sit next to me on the floor and look up at me during dinner, patiently waiting for me to finish so I could give her whatever was left - potatoes, chicken, pasta, rice, asparagus, you name it, she'd eat it.

I will miss her dearly.

[Sabrina]

I'm sorry about Phoebie Row Jimmy. I completely understand your pain. My baby, and extension of me, Amy, died last Monday. We knew she was ill but it was still unexpected. I find myself doing a lot of "what ifs". It's a hurt that will never go away. I'm really sorry.

[Artchic528]

Jimmy, going over "What ifs" in your head won't do you any good. I know you feel guilty, and even ashamed. I felt the same way when my Chihuahua was taken from me during a dog attack. I went over the "what ifs" in my head at least a few dozen times thinking "if only I had done this, she might still be alive". However, no matter what I thought "What if.." it wouldn't make any difference to the situation. She was gone, taken from me by the teeth of another dog, and mulling over the events in my head only served to make me more and more depressed.

I'm sure you were as loving and good an owner as you could be, and that she passed on knowing that you loved her. Isn't that all we could really want of our pets? Maybe, in time, you can let another dog into your life and heart, but for the time being, some healing is in order.

Take care.

[Quarter life]

I'm so very sorry for your dog Phoebie RowJimmy…hard times.

The loss of a beloved cherished pet can be heart wrenching. When I lost my dear little Jack Russell, the Rainbow Bridge Support site really helped. Its a tribute site for all pets that bought us so much joy. http://www.google.com.au/url?<br /> ...2OA2jRtQmVDFZw

Be kind to yourself JimmyRow

[Sabrina]

Originally Posted by Quarter life

I'm so very sorry for your dog Phoebie RowJimmy…hard times.

The loss of a beloved cherished pet can be heart wrenching. When I lost my dear little Jack Russell, the Rainbow Bridge Support site really helped. Its a tribute site for all pets that bought us so much joy. http://www.google.com.au/url?
q=http://www.rainbowbridge.com/&sa=U&ved=0ahUKEwjAvaSw1LrLAhVX22MKHevmDHcQFgguMAc&usg=AFQjCNFdAlpCrJHMN_cI2OA2jRtQmVDFZw

Be kind to yourself JimmyRow

I just thought I'd visit that tribute site Quarter Life - but for me it is an invalid link

[Artchic528]

Sabrina, I think this is the site Quarter Life was trying to link to.

Rainbow Bridge - A PetLoss Grief Support Community. Pet Bereavement and Memorial support for coping with the death of a loving fur baby.

What she did, I think, was copy a Google search result, rather than the actual site URL.

You could not have known. Forgive yourself.

[Fresia]

I am so sorry for your loss. Sending the kindest and gentlest of hugs.

It is really hard to read the signs of some illnesses and disease in our critters. The vets remind me too when mine have passed and it isn't until I am gone that I lose them, if even for a moment to leave for whatever reason....they say that they hang on for us, and in natural circumstances they would go off from the pack to pass. She may have been hanging on and waiting until you were gone just so as not to not upset you by passing with you or the kids present. This would be natural thing for them to do and nothing on your part that you could have done other than to keep her suffering on one hand, if that were the case. She is at peace now. Please forgive yourself, you could not have known.

Again, I am so sorry and in knowing how close I am and have been to mine, my heart breaks for you and is with you and your family.

[barbella]

I am so very sorry for your loss.

[Row Jimmy]

Thank you all for your thoughts - I woke up this AM in tears knowing she wasn't here. I'm not over the way it all went down, that's what makes it so difficult. I haven't cried like that since my grandfather died when I was 13 years old. I wasn't a "pet guy" growing up. My mom hated pets (among many other things) so we never had a pet in the house. We got Phoebie when I was around 40 - I was away on business and my wife surprised me one day and told me she had adopted a dog in this hardscrabble town about 120 miles away from where we live. She drove out to get her. We got a laugh out of it. When I came home, I was taken immediately and the fun lasted for 12 years. I am thankful for that but I will miss her. Part of me takes things for granted - maybe this is her lesson to me. I don't know..........I wish she was still here.

[lizardlady]

Jimmy, I'm sorry about Phoebie. It's so hard to lose our fur kids.

I'm going to repeat what some others have said. It's not your fault. Even the vet said they could not have saved her. As others said, she might have waited for you to leave before she let go.

I'm so sorry for your loss

[EnglishDave]

Row Jimmy,

I am so sorry you have lost Phoebie in difficult circumstances, but as your Vet and others have said you are entirely blameless. That you chose for your companion to accompany you in the car was natural, the outcome a tragic one in a million event.

Phoebie was clearly a special part of your life, I have a Granddog who is a mooch, too. It's the eyes which get you every time.

Take time to grieve with your family now, but do not feel guilt. Phoebie is now running free and chasing bunnies, or mooching sirloin steak.

Dave.

[kindachaotic]

Am so very sorry for your loss.

[MrD500]

Sorry for your loss.

[Chyialee]

I am so sorry for the loss of your FurBlessing. We lost ours in 2013; and before that I had lost 2 dogs in 2011 and 1999, respectively. All 3 were Siberian Huskies, females. I still cannot talk about them without choking up like a baby.

Please be kind to yourself. You were being a good Daddy -- to your kids, and to your FurKid. And there is perhaps something to the idea that she waited for you to go before she left you.

It will be hard, no gonna kid about that. But please know that you were very blessed in your moochie girl -- and are, still.

Best,
Chyia

[gayleggg]

I'm sorry for your loss.

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[beagleheart]

I'm so very sorry for your pain. I have been through a similar experience and I truly feEl for you.

[cakeladie]

Jimmy I am so sorry but just in mind that the vet was right there was nothing you could have done. If it's their time to go it's their time. We had a friend who was a 34 year old healthy guy guy that had a heart attack and was dead before he hit the floor. There was nothing hat could be done.

Just know your fur baby died in the comfort of her home.

But I am very sorry for your loss

[Takeshi]

Hello, Row Jimmy, I hope you've been coping alright with the grieving. I'm so sorry for the loss, I'll make sure that I get to read the said post that you mentioned earlier, it sounds like a great post already, I also hope that you get through the grief with the loved ones, talk about the fond memories when you're ready, to celebrate life.

She was with you, for you, I'd like to think that she can continue to help you grow as a person, as a family man.

[emgreen]

I know how difficult the loss of a dog is. Please take care of yourself. Crying is a good thing when in grief...