I am absolutely livid

I have midterms today, and this class is one of the most important classes--and the hardest class-- I've ever taken, and my four month old kitten cried nonstop all night long, then when I finally let him out he jumped on me over and over. He had food and water, he played and cuddled with me for hours last night. This was the first night he ever cried all night long. And I am absolutely livid because I am so exhausted from absolutely NO SLEEP on a day I need to be absolutely alert and refreshed and focused. I'm so absolutely frustrated and exhausted. I just needed to rant.

Rant away.

This has been a very emotional few weeks for me.

My brother came for a week and now two weeks later my grandparents have been here since Monday and it's been very high stress because I've been working so hard to stay up on studies (spending up to three hours every single day 7 days a week), work FT, care for a kitten, stay up on household/laundry/bill/food duties, and still make time to spend with my loved ones. I haven't seen my brother since the wedding last year, and I haven't seen my grandparents in three years and it's been a very emotional time for me. There's never enough time. Two days ago I had an emotional outburst/anxiety attack while with my family and left crying and it upset everyone and I felt terrible, and last night we had a scare with my dad. We thought he was having a stroke, but it was an anxiety attack. We've all had an emotional time lately and a lot of changes and excitement and stress.

So my kitten can't help being what he is, he has no idea what a big deal my midterms are...in fact, I don't know if my family realizes how big of a deal this class is. I'm taking medical terminology and I need the highest grade because it'll open so many doors for me. This is like the most functional/hardest/important class I've ever taken. I want a career in geriatrics, and I've gotten two job offers the past two days where excelling in this class will put me above everyone else for a lifelong career in a field I love. And it's not imaginary pressure I'm putting on myself, this class truly is the most important (and hardest) class I could ever take out of all the classes I've taken. Right now I'm at an A, but I'm so nervous about this midterm because it's not open book, and I've read maybe 10-12 chapters that are all in this midterm. I'm hoping, hoping, hoping I slow down and do well, not rush or guess but really sit and think about the questions. Please say a prayer or send good vibes my way.

Sending you prayers.

Updates...

Midterm was BS. Out of 100 questions, maybe 20 questions were on what we learned (which I studied so hard for) and the rest of the questions were on spelling and pronunciation...which was BS because there was hardly any questions on that, no auditory tests or homework and every word sounds differently in my head then it does with proper medical pronunciation. I got 76% and I'm still a high A.

I had a terrific relaxing day. Got to spend quality time with my loved ones. I talked it over with my Mom and Mamma and tonight will be the first night Elwood sleeps with me IN BED. They don't think he's too little and we all think he's accustomed enough to the house and to my routine where he shouldn't get into too much mischief--in fact, he's never gotten into mischief, he's not a cat that likes to snoop or get into trouble...he's always wanted to cuddle and have my full attention and he just loves being with me. So I am going to try that tonight and see if he'll be good. I am exhausted. No sleep last night, big midterm, lots of excitement today. I'm praying this will be a good thing.

I let Elwood sleep with me last night...I'd turn over cuz he'd stick his face in my face and then I'd roll over and he'd hop to the other side and stick his face in my face...all night...I haven't slept in two days, can't take time off of work, and I'm absolutely exhausted.

Elwood is just a baby. Kittens are wildly active and need lots of "mom."

I finally had good sleep!!! I went to bed at 9:30 and woke up at 8 feeling so refreshed. Elwood did great. He slept in the crook of my arm against my chest so peacefully. He never made a fuss until *I* was ready to get up, then he played footsie with me. I'm so happy because he did so well and I slept so good. Yay!!!