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Veteran Member
Member Since Aug 2020
Location: LA
Posts: 528
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#1
I have struggled with my eating all my life, but never felt I had an eating disorder.
Last night after dinner I was dying for some candy. So much so I almost went out and purchased some. The only thing that stopped me was potential embarrassment of my neighbors seeing that I went out to get candy. And of course, if I went all the way out to purchase something, no way was it just going to be a 200 calorie bar, it would be a bag -- that I probably would eat in an hour. So I looked for a book on Binging... and I found "Brain over Binge" - I downloaded the audio book. I was surprised to find that this woman was pretty much me. I have never thrown up (which she did) but I have binged my entire life like her AND it seems like it is somewhat a reaction to dieting. It all started as a teenager. Probably in direct response to my mother. She had kept me on a diet most of my life and never allowed me too many treats. At the same time she fed my brother like crazy. Often making him 5 or 6 hamburgers. Some part of me was annoyed by that. Of course he had a big metabolism but to me it was favorite treatment. I remember sneaking food all the time. If he got a Pizza and didn't eat it all, I would steal a slice. But I remained thin due to my mother's rules. Exactly like the author of the book I decided to diet in my junior year not because I was fat, but because everyone else was doing it. This kicked off an endless cycle of dieting -- binging and gaining weight easily. Once I got the keys to freedom in my senior year, there was no turning back. I gained mass amounts of weight in college and every year since it is a diet, followed by gaining it back (due to binging) I never really felt I was binging. I just felt that I was more hungry than my metabolism would allow for. So I felt I was eating normally. I realized a part of my weight gain after a loss is that I probably do binge. But to me it never seemed like that.. it just seemed like I was returning to normal eating.. but.. it isn't normal.. in fact it is probably a reason that I gain it all back. But reading this book I see this author has and had exactly the feelings that I do... like I am always hungry. And further, always hungry for sweets. This hunger never goes away.. I am, in fact, on an appetite suppressant pill right now, Phentermine.. and yet, I am still hungry after dinner?? !! Can it really be hunger? No it is an urge. I couldn't finish the book last night but I am excited that maybe now that I can address this for what it is... I can get it under control. |
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abigrand, Anonymous32451, Anonymous41462, unaluna, Yaowen
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jan 2020
Location: USA
Posts: 3,619
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#2
Dear NatalieJastrow,
How wonderful that you found that book that is helping you. I have also been lucky in crossing paths with life changing books. Thanks so much for sharing what you wrote! Sincerely yours, Yao Wen |
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Anonymous41462, NatalieJastrow
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#3
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I am glad you have that book. you know: it may be worth me reading it too, it sounds like it has really helped you and I can eat a bag of candy in an hour plus more.. |
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Anonymous41462
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