[_skylin_]

i shared wtth you all recnttly about our 22yr old son, wth PTSD. and the ripple efect on our 4 othr teens. a bit mor inffo.....
we got him out of the psych ward this summr, caus he cut himsslf(i shared he uses SI, rite?) badly. ok it reely swallowed alot of enerjjy, time, bless his hart. ok. our 2nd oldest son is starting colleg now. we have 2 senrs in higgh scool, a boy and a girl and a sophmor. a girl. we find out our 2 girls who are joind at the hip all tthe time hav bben lying tto us yet agen about wher thay hav ben going whn thay are going out. what is bad abbout that, is a few times thay hav 'spent tthe nite' at a frend's howse....but thay wernt ther. so wher did thay spend the nite?? whn we fownd out, and talkkd tto them, it wwas 'wel, you let him get away wth this and that...blah blah blah' whcch i no is soooo typiccl its laffabl. but geez-la-weez

its not evn the problm. we havnt talkd to our son about a few rules as sugestd (like de-trashing the room jus a bit, and mabbe NOT spenddng 10 hrs at a time on the viddeo games) beccaus i'm afrad of the 'fall-out'. how bout that. its true. i'v put it off, and he's hapy as a lark, walkng arownd pokin at evrybody til thay are a nervus wrreck and gettng away wtth it. i NEED to put a stop to it. and if anybody ses one thng to him, he blows up, screems its my faullt and ses its the PTSD. then he disapeers to his room for a long time, and we wondrr if he's cuttng. and we wory. then wwhn he DOS come out, he's hatefful for awhile, and gos bak to tthe videogame computr downdsstares. and it starts all ovr.

i have vissited the PTSD bord, the DID bord and the SI bord, tho i dont post on tthem. i'm conserned of triggring sombody. i just dont no wwhat to ask.

i'm sory tthis is so long, and that i didnt use the spellcheker, but i'm tired, i'v ben up ffor 3 nites strate. and i'm a zombie. you all hav bbeen so grate. how do i actuly DO it? and how do i deal wtth the aftr afects?
he finly has a SSDI appt. this friday. my husbnd insistd. he wants to put a 1-yr time limit on him, to get mor independdent and to get out on his own. this is my husbnd's plan for all 5 of the kids. our son has indicatd that he has absolutly no plans doing tthis at all. i ffeel like i'm losing my mind.
did you no afftr 3 nites of no sleep the rooms in yor howse have no cornrs? lol
hugs to all wwho wood like one.......i shur cood use one. thinkin of you all.
sara

[Rhapsody]

(((( HUGS )))) - Hang in there and stick to the rules that you and your husband have come up with - it will work in time. Please make sure that your son follows up with his T and that he takes any and all medicine that has been Rx for him.

LoVe,
Rhapsody -

[_skylin_]

this is gettng rediculus. i cant beleev how hard this is! i dont undrsstand my swetty hands and my hyprventalating evry singl freeking time i start to bring up the convrsatn with our eldest. geez! i'm 37yrs old! i fot cancer and won! i hav delt with othr tuff stuff bbfor! i hav handled fragil young peepl bfor, in my youtth direcctr job! i'm not an idiot! why in the world am i sooooo intimidated by this?!?



i rmembr the thngs he screemd at me last time, and i'm not redy to heer that agen. i'm a 37yr old cowward who is sposed to be rasing theese 5 young peeple and the things he sed showd me that i'm inadeqquat and to blame for evrythng, and i gess i jus took it all. and i dont no what to do now. the shaking got so bad i droppd a glass.

i HAVE to get past tthis, to set these groundrules ddown. he had peepl calling the house at 3am lasnite caus his cell 'lost receptn'. my husbnd went crazy. we thot it was bad news bout his dad, we hav a rule wth all the kids....NOBODY uses the fone aftr midnite. DUH! lol then we wer upset caus of him smarting off bout it, and coodnt get bak to sleep, and my husbnd had to go to wrrk tday upset......

he DOS need to get bak to therpy. he has an appt. ths friday for SSDI, and for meds chek. he IS taking the ones he has now. i just dont think thay are wrrking rite.

geez.......

sara

[alisandria]

(((sara))) one step at a time....and the girls, shame on them, they know better and you can tell them that...their actions will not be tolerated, they are pushing you & your husband's buttons....your son, I'd wait it out before I say anything or start pushing deadlines on moving out, that can backfire and undermine progress right now...just get him into the therapy, and you & your husband keep the sites of what you want in your minds, and the goals, and navigate him that way. Could you and your husband seek counseling as well? Even just a few visits to help you guys figure out how to deal with this. Whether you need tough love? or another alternative? That way whatever you do, you know you are on track and can know somewhat what to expect. The whole cutting thing, that's hard to deal with on an outpatient basis. Anyone I have known of that has had that condition has always done well with inpatient care, but generally it was of a voluntary basis.

I feel so much for you, cause I can tell how much you love your kids and family...how much both you and your husband do, and how hard this is on the two of you!!! Just know you can come hear and chat or post-you need support for you too ya know!!!! Don't try to go it alone, or bottle it...there is always someone here to listen, lend a hand.

Positive healing thoughts being sent your way. Hugs, Lisa.

[_skylin_]

thanks alissandria. ttruth. it rreely IS a releef jus to no i can come heer wth peeple who undrstand. and whn i'm not compleetly exhostd, i use the spellchecker. and whn i dont you all dont seem to mind. thankss for that too.

i'm printting all thees responsses out, to show my husbnd. so we can talk. we need help.
to ttop it all off, i testd positiv for mono AND strep the othr day. grate. lol

hugs to evrybody struggling heer. i do read alot. and i'm wwith ya all. i'l ttry to bbe mor activ.

sara